Warning: discussed abuse and mental illness
~
It was nearly half past ten by the time Lyra arrived home that night. Her father was passed out on the couch, snoring loudly, and she cautiously snuck past down the hallway and towards her mother's office. Knocking three times, she waited for an answer, which came immediately.
"Hullo?"
"It's me, Mom," Lyra announced. "I'm home."
"C'mon in, sweetie," Connie answered.
Lyra twisted the doorknob and pushed the door open, revealing her mother sitting at her computer with her fingers flying across the keyboard. The room's lights had been dimmed, causing Connie's face to be illuminated by the computer screen. She was doing some work for her summer job.
"How was work?" Connie asked, not looking away from the computer.
Lyra paused for a moment. How could she tell her that the man who had assaulted her had shown up? She couldn't. That would only worry her.
"Meh, the usual," Lyra said at last with a shrug.
With that, Lyra approached Connie and wrapped her arms around her shoulders from behind as though to hug her. She kissed the side of her head.
"Aw," Connie exclaimed fondly. She affectionately rested her head against her daughter's.
Lyra took a deep breath, trying to relieve her stress from earlier. Coming home to her mother after a long evening shift always made her feel at least a little better. Connie was the only one at home who made her feel comforted. It was hard to get affection in this house.
"Well, I'm almost done here," Connie said as she continued typing. "Want me to make you some tea when I'm done?"
"Mom, I'm not nine anymore," Lyra quipped, almost chuckling. "I'm twenty-one - I can make it myself."
"I know," Connie sighed. "You and your brother grow up too fast, Ly-Ly."
"Besides," Lyra continued, "the snack I packed was enough, and I got something at Anderson's, anyway."
That was a lie, as Lyra's stomach was grumbling for sustenance. But she didn't want any of the food in the house to go to waste: Connie and Toby needed to eat more than she did.
"Is Toby asleep?" Lyra asked.
"He was passed out last time I checked," Connie answered. "Don't worry, they didn't get hurt tonight."
That's when Lyra noticed the bruises on her mother's neck, as if she had been choked. Worry crashed into her like a tidal wave.
"Mom, you're hurt - "
"Baby, it's okay," Connie reassured her, waving away her concerns. "I put some cream on it."
Lyra's blood began to boil. She tightened her arms around her mother, and her jaw clenched. She was going to tear her father apart one day.
"What the hell happened?" Lyra demanded, her voice dangerously low.
Connie gulped. She didn't want to admit it, but sometimes, she could see Frank's short fuse in their daughter's own temper.
"Your father got annoyed at Toby's tics again," she answered at last, her voice nothing more than a mumble. "Toby's swearing tic offended him and set him off."
Lyra growled under her breath. It infuriated her that Frank was always getting mad at Toby for something he couldn't control.
Before Lyra knew it, she had stood up straight. She began to stomp towards the door, her intentions being to grab her baseball bat and give Frank a taste of his own medicine. Knowing what her daughter was thinking, Connie jumped out of her chair and grabbed her wrist.
"Lyra, please, it's too late for a fight," she begged.
"That bastard fucking choked you, and not in a good way!" Lyra shot back. "I'm sick of him pushing you around like he does anything to support the family!"
Connie put a finger to her lips, signaling for Lyra to keep her voice down. Lyra simply rolled her eyes.
"C'mon, y'know I can take him in a fight!" Lyra went on.
"I don't want you getting hurt," Connie argued.
"You calling me weak!?" Lyra demanded, almost angrily. "You fucking calling me weak!?"
Connie's face filled with fear as she saw the sudden rage swirling in her daughter's eyes. Nevertheless, she took Lyra's hand in both of hers. She couldn't be afraid of one of her own treasured children. She wouldn't allow it.
But she worried about Lyra. Her blood had always run cold when she had caught her playing with dead animals and getting into violent fights with someone who had angered her, and she felt uncomfortable when Lyra casually talked about arson and murder. And it had only gotten worse after the disappearance and assumed death of Lyra's best friend Liu. Of course, Connie herself was not perfectly stable, but she wanted only the best for her little girl.
"We're all tired, baby," Connie coaxed her. "And I know how strong you are, but you're not invincible. Besides, you must be exhausted after work."
Silence fell between the two women. At last, Lyra sighed.
"Where's the badass you used to be?" she scoffed, pulling her hand away.
That question seemed to hurt Connie, but Lyra didn't care. She could still remember the days when she still had a warm household full of love, when her mother had been a strong woman who didn't take orders from anyone, despite Frank not approving of it. What happened to the Connie who cussed like a sailor, argued with authorities, and dressed how she wanted wherever she went? What happened to the Connie who taught her children to fight back with fists if they had to, not to keep their heads high and walk away? She was still a good mother, and she protected her children from Frank as best she could. But, for the past few years, she had been simply taking the abuse directed at her.
Connie eventually regained her composure, standing up straight.
"Passed on to you," she answered at last.
Lyra felt a lump in her throat. She truly was her mother's daughter, as Connie was fond of telling her.
"G'night, Mom," she said at last. As she left the room, she could hear Connie reply, "Sleep tight, sweetheart."
Before Lyra went to her room to get ready for bed, she went to check on her brother, like she did every night. Entering Toby's room as silently as she could, she tip-toed towards his bed and gently carressed their hair, whispering a goodnight. But as she was leaving, she heard Toby speak to her:
"I r-really hate it when y-you t-take the evening sh-ifts," he said, their voice slurred from grogginess. "You're a t-t-terrible sister, y'know that?"
For a moment, Lyra froze in her tracks. If Toby wanted her around, how come they never showed her that? Nevertheless, Lyra felt awful. Was she not doing enough?
"You're t-turning into Dad," said Toby.
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