Mystery of Love

5

When a person stares into blank space with widened eyes, they might not always be daydreaming. It may be difficult to tell apart, but it is that of a troubled mind.

Theo was experiencing that exact feeling. His mind was racing with dozens of thoughts per second.

It was 2am in the morning where most people would be sleeping. Theo sat in his bed as he couldn't seem to fall asleep.

His mind was so confused. He absolutely hated feeling this conflicted. It was like experiencing some sort of emotion or feeling that he could not describe. The worst part is the inability to pinpoint the root cause of that feeling.

Actually, he knew. He knew when he usually felt that way. It occurs when his brain cannot process a significant event that happened to him.

Recalling the events that happened that day, he buried his face into the pillow. 𝘋𝘪𝘥 𝘩𝘦 𝘧𝘪𝘯𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 𝘨𝘪𝘷𝘦 𝘶𝘱 𝘵𝘳𝘺𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘰 𝘶𝘯𝘥𝘦𝘳𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘸𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘩𝘦 𝘸𝘢𝘴 𝘧𝘦𝘦𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘨? 𝘔𝘢𝘺𝘣𝘦.

"Don't over-analyse every situation. Some things are meant to be felt rather than rationalized." His inner conscience seemed to advise him.

And indeed his inner conscience might be right. If it was true that he was falling in love, there was nothing he could do to prevent it from happening. He was aware that he knew nothing about love, 𝘴𝘰 𝘸𝘩𝘺 𝘵𝘳𝘺 𝘵𝘰 𝘶𝘯𝘥𝘦𝘳𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘪𝘵 𝘯𝘰𝘸?

No matter how many romance films or shows he watched, none of it could have prepared him for the real-life scenario.

It took almost an hour before he finally felt his muscles relaxing and his conscious mind drifting into a distant place.

The following day was Saturday, which meant slacking on the couch watching Netflix. He had schoolwork to complete, but decided to procrastinate because it was a quiet afternoon where neither his parents nor his brothers were home. His brothers would usually snatch the TV to watch their awful shows.

"Ozark or Stranger Things?" Theo was torn between watching a serious and dark show or something more light-hearted.

Eventually, he spent the afternoon watching a couple of episodes from both shows.

Standing up after hours spent on the couch, blood flowed through his entire body again, causing a sudden blurry vision which quickly faded.

He took the house keys and went to the nearby park for a walk. He enjoyed the serenity and fresh air from a nice stroll in the park, though some might think that that is an activity more suitable for the middle-aged.

From the corner of his eyes, Theo noticed a wild cat resting under a bench in the "loaf" position. Its legs and tail were neatly tucked under its body to conserve heat. He approached the cat and patted its head to which it responded with a soft purr.

Theo loved cats. He planned on adopting a pug and a himalayan cat when he lives alone in the future. Those were the ideal breeds though other kinds were lovable as well.

He found it difficult to imagine getting married to another man and living with him for the rest of his life. Besides, same-sex marriage was illegal in his state.

Returning home, he saw the sign-up form lying on his desk. As part of the school's programme to promote a healthy lifestyle, every student in his level had to pick a sport of their choice.

His parents had strongly encouraged him to go with swimming as they thought it was a necessary life skill. He checked the relevant box and cramped the paper into his schoolbag.

On the day of submitting the form, Theo found out that Jovan picked swimming as his option too.

Jovan was simply walking by when he noticed the form lying on Theo's desk.

"Hey I picked swimming too. You know how to swim?"

"Nope. But I'm going to learn." Theo replied.

"Same. Are you going to wear the full swimsuit or just the trunks?"

"Just swimming trunks."

"Aight same. See you at the swimming complex next week then." With that, Jovan ended their brief conversation.

During lunch break, Theo retold the conversation to Abby and Lola.

"I don't know why we are always together. It's like wherever I go, that's where he is."

"Theo, It's a signnn." Lola grinned.

"I don't know what you are talking about Lola."

"Don't lie. The two of you are 𝘮𝘦𝘢𝘯𝘵 𝘵𝘰 𝘣𝘦. Besides, both of you look so cute together. I totally ship you two."

"I agree." Abby added.

It was hopeless. Theo felt that they could never offer a practical advice. Lola in particular, was only interested in getting him into a relationship. She seemed to be more excited about the idea of matchmaking.

Theo couldn't blame them. They were his closest friends and one of the only people he told his secrets to. In fact, they were the first people that he came out to. To be fair, they already knew way beforehand and was always pressuring him to admit his sexuality.

To some people, getting into relationships seemed easy and fun. Theo could never understand some of the girls in school who would literally get into a new relationship immediately after breaking up.

Theo however, took the idea of a relationship really seriously, to the extent of overthinking every detail.

He exhaled through his mouth in a discontented manner and proceeded to sip on his strawberry milk.