lost in my mind

         The man was still on my floor passed out, i put on a pair of ripped up jeans and a hoodie. i gathered up my phone, ipod, and clothes and anything else i needed and shoved it into my bag. i needed to get out of here, and fast and i knew exctly where i was going. i went to my moms room and as i suspected she was passed out on the floor. i put my bag down and scooped her up in my arms and put her on the bed. i combed her tangled brown hair and and laid her down gently and tucked her in. i wiped her tears away and kissed her on the forehead. i knew she would have a killer hangover in the morning so i left her a glass of water and a packet of alcaseltzer. "bye mom" i whispered she opened her eyes slightly and whispered back "im sorry" and she slipped back into sleep. i let a few tears slip down my face before wiping them away. i grabbed my things and went back to my room and dragged the man out of the house. i locked the door just incase he tried to come back for my mom when he woke up. i dragged him down the street to the park and left him there in the grass. i looked down at him in disgust and walked away. i checked my phone and it was 4:35 a.m. i only slept for 2 hours and i was exausted.

           I walked back to my house and got in my car, i threw my things into the passengers seat and drove to a friends house.

              i knocked on the door of his appartment, his dark brown hair was a mess, his dark blue eyes still swolen with sleep. he didnt have a shirt  on so his light olive skin and abbs where shown. "felix put  a shirt on" i teased  hes smiled but his smile quickly faded once he saw my eye and lip. his eyes widened with worrie "what the hell happened to you?!" he said pulling me inside. "my mom brought home this guy from a club and i woke up to her screaming and he was choking her. so i defended her and he came after me and beat me and tried to rape me" i said between sobs. his eyes widened in pure anger "where is he?" felix asked with fire in his eyes "i dragged him to the park down the street from my house and left him there" he came and hugged me "im sorry felix,i would have went to bella's house but if her parents would have seen me like this they would flip." "no im glad you came here" he smiled "i get lonely sometimes" he said sadly. Felix was abused by his parents too. he moved out and got this appartment. "want to watch a movie?" i suggested "yeah sure" he smiled "the breakfast club" we both said at the same time. it was our favorite movie. Felix put in the movie and sat down next to me.

               It was nice being able to hang out with my bestfriend, i leaned against him and relaxed. before i knew it i fell asleep. i woke up with my head in felix's lap and his hand on my head. i sat up and shook him awake "get up dork im hungry" i said "what do you want to eat?" he asked stretching  "im in the mood for hash browns and-" "pancakes" he finnished my sentence "stop doing that" i said "doing what?" he asked confused "knowing me so well it aggravtes me." i pouted "well thats kinda hard to do since we've been best friends since 6th grade so... yeah" "whatever" i shook my head "k lets go" i prompted. we walked down to my car and jumped in. i let felix drive, we pulled out of the parking lot and drove down the road, the streets where empty, all was quiet and peacefull. felix and i where silent but it wasnt an awkward silent it was comfortable.

         we pulled up to a small diner and walked in, when i opened the door the smell of bacon and eggs flled my nose and made my mouth water. we took our seats and a friendly blonde girl came over to take our orders. "butter milk pancakes with whipped cream on top and a side of hashbrowns please" i stated. the girl smiled at me with a bit of concern in her eyes when she saw my bruised eye, and nooded writing down my order. "and for you?" she winked at Felix "bacon,egg and cheese,sandwich please" he said casually not even noticing her attempt at flirting. i had to admit Felix was really good looking and was the best friend ive ever had but i never fell for him. he is and always will be just my best friend. "so terra im going to bella's house after breakfast to hang out and im going to have dinner with her and her parents will you be okay alone today?" he asked slightly concerned "Felix ive been alone my entire life, im pretty sure ill be okay today" i stated. 

           "Just making sure" he said shrugging "thanks for letting me spend the night" i said looking down at my hands i wasnt used to asking for anything "no problem T" he smiled "you can stay as long as you want" just then our food arrived. shoveled down my food. ididnt realize how hungry i was "i guess kicking someone's ass makes you hungry" he lauged but i just ignored him and focused on my food. when we finnished we walked back to my car and drove back to his appartment. he changed and said bye "bye terra ill see you later movie night tonight?" he asked "sure, tell bella i said hi" i said "okay" he noded and left. i realized i still had Max's number so i called "hello?" he answered. just the sound of his voice made my heart jump "hey its terra" i said "hey i was just thinking about you" i blushed "so do you still want to hang out today?" i asked "yeah come over" then he hung up. "well okay" i said to myself. i went into felix's room and changed into skinny jeans and a long sleeve shirt that hangs off my shoulder. i looked in the mirror at my beat up face and messy hair.

          i combed out my hair and did my best to cover up my bruises with makeup. i got my car and turned up the radio. Max texted me the adress, it was the same house the party was at last night, i knocked on the door and he answered. he didnt have a shirt on, he ws only in sweat pants wich he  managed to make look good. "hey" he smiled "hey" i said back "i ws thinking we could have a lazy day today?" "that sounds perfect" i said releived, i wasnt exactly in the mood to go out anywhere. he lead me upstairs to his room. it smelled like axe body spray it was absolutly intoxicating. he opened a drawer and pulled out a pair of sweat pants and a t-shirt and handed it to me. "whats this for?" i asked "well we're having a lazy day so you have to be comfortable" he stated as if it was obvious "oh right" i laughed "wheres your bathroom?" "just change i promise i wont look" he turned away and faced the wall "ugh fine" i sighed. i slipped off my shirt and jeans and put on the clothes max gave me. "you can turn around now" he turned around and walked over to the bed and laid down turning on the t.v.  he motioned for me to lay down too. i walked over and laid down and tried to focus on the t.v. he put his arm round me and gently touched the bruises on my arm "what happened?" he whispered "nothing i just fell" i said back "then why are they in the shape of fingers?" i didnt say anything... he caught me. "you can tell me" he assured.

          i dont know what came over me but i told him what happened, and i noticed when i got to the part when the man was on top of me his jaw clenched and his hands balled up into fists. "he better hope i dont find him" max said furiously. i sat up and looked at him and his eyes widened in horror "your eye" he said between clenched teeth. "its okay max its over. i can take care of myself its not the first this has happened" he took my face in his hands and gently ran his thumb over the cut on my lip. my heart stoped and i wasnt sure what to do. i was overwhealmed and a tear slipped out. he wiped it away and pulled me to him. he laid back down and my head was on his chest. i could hear his heart beat and it calmed me down slightly. we just laid there and watched t.v. quietly. i curled up and fell asleep. 

        when i woke it was 5:00 p.m. i tried to get up but max only pulled me closer. "max" i whispered while gently shaking him awake he opened his green eyes and looked into mine. "im hungry" he said stretching "me too" i said. he looked up at me and pulled me close "do you want to spend the night?" he asked seductively "well i have to call felix and tell him" "why do you have to call him" he asked with alittle jelousy in his tone and it was actually kind of cute "because i went to his house last night after the fight and im staying with him untill i figure out what to do" "is your mom always like that or was it just that one time?" "i rather not talk about it" i looked away. "its okay i get it" he said. 

        "Well i'll go grab some food and we could head out to the lke for a while?" he asked dropping the subject, my heart sped up with excitement, i really did enjoy that lake "yeah that sounds fun" i smiled "alright ill be back" he walked out of the room. i sat down on the bed and burried my face in my hands. Whats wrong with me? why am i even here, i know all im doing is setting myself up for hurt. I looked around the room slowly taking in each detail max's walls where just a plain simple white and his bed was black, the soft comforter provided much warmth, his flat screen t.v was mounted on the wall, his dresser matched his bed and on top of it was an array of beanies and cologne. his closet was neat and my favorite part was it mostly consists of sweat pants and t-shirts and  i liked his room it was simple and modern, good taste.