Something but Nothing

Chapter Ten

I opened my eyes and saw nothing but darkness. I no longer felt the warmth of William's body on mine. I thought he had left me after the eventful night we shared until I heard muffled yelling coming from downstairs. 

I got up from the bed, wrapping the bed sheets around my naked body. I looked at my phone and saw that it was a little after 2 a.m. I eased out of the bedroom and followed the sound of the voices. The yelling echoed throughout the house and then I realized that it was William and his wife arguing. 

I got to the railing of the staircase and hid behind the wall listening to the conversations. That's when I heard my name and realized the conversation was about me. 

"You are a fucking cheater, William! You didn't even let the divorce finalize before sleeping with the fucking nanny!" Her voice carried through the halls. Her anger as clear as day. Pain and hurt filled the room. I couldn't help but feel bad knowing all of this was my fault.

"Don't do that. You've cheated first with that European model, and I forgave you. You fucking asked for the divorce after I tried over and over to make this right!" 

"Doesn't mean you had to get back at me! You're not the type to get revenge. I had calls from every damn news source asking for an interview about my husband and the mystery woman that is in the Wilson's Charity Ball pictures. You two are at the fucking headline and biggest scandal of the year!"

"So were you and that French male model! I didn't do this to get back at you. I will always love you, Krissy."

"But you love her more."

"Yeah, I love her."

"Very well then. I'm going to go get some of my things. I'll send Elise to get the rest once the divorce is final. Hope you're fucking happy."

I stopped listening at that point. I leaned against the wall and slid down the cold surface. At that moment I heard her heels clicking up every step, but I didn't move. I sat there with my head on my knees and tear-filled eyes thinking of the chaos I had brought to this family. I know it isn't all my fault, but I can't help but to blame myself.

Krissy stood in front of me, I rose to my feet, meeting the bleak look on her face. Her facial expression just made my heart sink further into my stomach. I tried to speak but no words came out. 

"Don't bother, you've said and done enough in this home." Her tone was harsh and hurtful. 

I didn't try to debate against her words. I turned and started towards the stairs to go speak to William. I felt a hard push from behind and quickly lost my balance. I went falling down the steps unable to get ahold of myself. I then felt my head hit something hard.

Everything went numb. William's words were fading in and out. My last thoughts before complete unconsciousness were filled with the smiling face of William and the guilt for all the drama, I've caused this family. Then everything went black.

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I lifted my heavy eyelids to see a bright light over me. My vision was blurry to my surroundings. I thought I was viewing the bright lights of Heaven until I heard a mumble of voices that were surely not our Lord and Savior. I heard a door shut and the place I was in grew quiet. As my vision began to clear, I saw the rectangle-shaped lights above my head. I was in and out of consciousness.  Seeing the bright lights, I realized that I am in the hospital. I quickly sat up on the bed, looking down at the IVs in my veins. I always had a fear of needles and attempted to remove them until a small pair of cold, pale hands gently pushed my hands away from the IVs. Eventually, I gave up fiddling with the damn thing and let my body relax.

Seconds later the same pair of pale hands held up a cup of water to my mouth. I took steady sips while I looked at the woman caring for me. She was older, maybe in her mid-50s. She was tall with a slim figure. Her hair was in a neat bun that looked to be too tight. She took the cup away from my mouth when it was halfway empty. She sat it on the small table beside me. 

I looked at the name tag on her shirt which read HELEN and under it said RN. "Glad to see you awake, Miss Brown. I'm Helen and I will be your nurse, so if you need anything just push that red button and ask for me. I need you to remember three words for me. House, Apple, Sugar. Can you tell me your name and where you are." Her voice was soft like honey. Soothing to the ears. 

I said my name and that I am in a hospital in a low voice. My throat still a bit dry. I reach over for the cup of water, taking more sips while repeating the three words in my head.

"Okay, good. Do you remember what had happen? The reason you're in the hospital." I take deep breathe before responding. 

"Yes. I was pushed down in the Rockefeller's home. William's wife, Kristie, pushed me down the stairs. I hit my head and blacked out. Is William here?

Her face went pale, and a bit of worry was showing. She forced gave a small smile before saying good job. She asked for the three words, and I said them loud and clear. She nodded her head before mumbling something about a doctor and left the room.

Shortly after a man in a white lab coat walked in. He was a short Asian man. He walked in with a smile, obviously happy to see me awake. He came to the side of the bed where Helen once stood. He looked at the monitor, watching the green and blue line pattens go across the screen. Marking in a book that I didn't notice was in his head. 

He looked at me with small smile. "Hello, Miss Brown, I am Dr. Xiong. I'm happy that you are finally awake. We were getting worried about you." He looked at the scribbles on the paper and his face sadden a bit. It was making me worry now because Helen was the same way when I told her what I remembered.

"Just tell me straight, what's wrong Doc." I sat up on the bed a bit to listen. 

"Well, I hate to tell you this since you are just waking up, but you are so eager to know." He breathes in and out.

 "Nurse Helen said you told her that you were here because you were pushed downstairs at someone named William Rockefeller's home. I hate to say this but that did not happen."

He went quiet waiting for reaction. Waiting to see if he needed to get back up in case, I have a psychotic moment. I was speechless, I don't know what is going on. 

"W-what do you mean? So how did I get here?" I couldn't help but to stutter as I got caught on my words. Was I crazy? Was this a dream? I didn't understand what was happening right now.

His face relaxed a bit see that my reaction was not hysterical. "You were in a car accident. You were hit by a drunk driver in a police chase. You suffered terrible injuries such as four broken ribs, collapsed lung and a severe brain bleed."

I felt my breath quicken. It was panic attack. Even though I am doped up on pain medicine, I feel slight pains in the areas he just named. It was all coming back now. Leaving the bar, playing music, the bright lights then all of a sudden, darkness.

"When was this?" I asked the doctor. He didn't hear me as his eyes looked over the monitor once again. I repeated myself a bit louder causing him to jump a little bit. He brushed it off with a cough before giving me an answer.

"Today is October 14, the accident was three weeks ago. You've been in a coma until now." 

A frown appeared on his face. I know he felt bad, but I could care less about his sympathy. I was crush. The Starbucks, the William, the fall, all of it was nothing. Nothing. I mean it was something but nothing. It was a dream. Just a figure of imagination or whatever dream are. 

My mind lied to me. Filling my head with nothing. Nothing but pictures that felt real. I awoke thinking he would be here by my side. Yet, he wasn't. He didn't exist. Not him, not Kristie nor Sophia or Johnathan. That push from a dream was my wake-up call. Literally. I wish that nothing was actually something.