Something but Nothing

Chapter Eleven

Six months has passed since the accident and when I had awoken from my coma. My mind still plays tricks on me. Thinking I'll run into William one day at Starbucks. I had gotten a few offers on the Northside of city, just two weeks after getting out of the hospital. It really made me believe that it was all real, that the party had really happened. I drove around the city expecting to see his name on billboards and signs. I even drove through the Northside expecting to see that big luxury mansion on almost 100 acres of land. Then I realized that place didn't exist. It was all a dream. My disappointment was proof of that.

I haven't been with a man since the night of the accident. Nor have I been to the bar. It's not because I'm too busy but because I'm scared of going back to reality. My memories of what really happened are coming back while the memories of what I thought happened were fading away. Back into the deep crevices of my mind. 

"You need to get out of the house." Jessica yelled from the other end of the phone. It was a Friday night and instead of clubbing with girlfriends I sat on the couch binge watching episodes of Supernatural while eating chocolate ice cream. 

"I do get out of the house; I work every day." I blurted a response while scrapping the bottom of the pint.

"Other than that. Go have a drink at whatever bar you go to get laid." 

I didn't respond to that. Just another reminder of my life before the accident. I even started going to therapy for what happen, but still, I feel that I am missing something. Something I left back in those dreams.

"I MEAN IT. Get your sorry ass up before I hop on a plane just to come drag you out. I did it once before, I'll do it again." Her voice echo through my little apartment.

"Fine, fine. I'll go. Don't need a repeat of what happened last time. You're the reason I started having one-night stands in the first place." I rolled my eyes knowing she couldn't see me as I rose from the comfort of my sofa.

"Yes, yes I am and I'm still waiting for my thank you for getting you laid." I could envision the smile on her face as she said that sentence.

"Uh-huh. Well, I'm getting dress I'll call you tomorrow. I had enough of your threats for one night. Bye. Love you. Mwah"

"Not threats, just promises. Love you more. Mwah!"

With that the call ended. I could lie and just lay back down but I know Jess. She'll track my location and see that I am still home and hop on the first plane here. Thats a best friend for you.

I took a quick shower then rampaged through my closet for skinny jeans, a slightly revealing shirt and whatever boots I could find. Jess texted while I was in the shower saying, "WEAR SOMETHING SEXY." Even though I planned to do so anyway. Just because I'm not feeling up to going doesn't mean I won't get all dolled up for it. You never know who is watching. I'm not trying to look like a depressed alcoholic like half the people who go in a bar. 

I enter the Moonlit bar and it hadn't changed in the slightest. It was already halfway full by college students and workers. Pretty much anyone who is looking to get a good meal, a good drink and a good lay. I headed towards the end of the bar near a corner where no one was sitting. I had a clear view of the bar from this spot. I liked it.

"Long time, no see. I haven't seen you since the night of your accident. How are you holding up." A familiar voice called from behind the bar. I looked over and saw Chuck's friendly smile shining towards me.  

"Hey Chuck, I'm good. Just been busy. Sorry I haven't been in lately. Sleep, work, eat, repeat. You know how it is." I returned the smile, but it felt a bit fake, forced. 

"Well, I'm just happy to see my favorite customer back at it. Free drinks tonight." 

Before I could object to that he yells over to an unfamiliar woman at the other end of the bar. Telling her that all my rounds were on the house. She was wearing all black like Chuck. I guess they finally hired someone else. 

"Oh, and if you're looking for a new catch, there's a new guy who has been coming in every Friday. Better shoot your shot." Chuck glanced somewhere behind me, but I didn't try to turn in that direction.

"Nah, I'm done with all that. Just focusing on me." I let out a little chuckle, surprised at what just came out of my mouth. 

I took a sip of the cocktail that Chuck gave me earlier when I sat down. I haven't had much since that night, and I must say it is much need. I was still drinking when Chuck said, "More for me then" before walking to another customer. I laughed remembering that he's bisexual. I wouldn't be surprised if he gets a couple of phone numbers a night.

Now I was alone again. I've had a total of two and a half drinks now. I saw a few guys that I slept with then ghosted come in and out of the bar. I would leave to the bathroom just to avoid them, and Chuck would knock on the door when they left or weren't nearby. Toast to the good friends.

The bar began to clear out and it was only so many people left. Even though I was still at the end of the bar, my hiding spot was slowing revealing itself as people began leaving. I didn't want to be bothered but I wasn't ready to leave for some odd reason. It was like something was about to happen. And something did.