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He listen to silence, almost inaudible music, the clinking of glasses, a few voices in the distance. He get used to listening to the silence now, it won't scare him the way it used to. He made it clear that he would not turn to him. Jeon would not turn to him. Taehyung had to come to him. He had to come to him. And if he don't want to, he'll accept it wholeheartedly. He'll respect Taehyung's decision.
But Jeon is afraid and fairy certain that he will not be able to love anyone, if Taehyung decides to leave him. Funny, how loosing someone ruins your ability to love anyone else just as deeply. He couldn't think of anything else beyond Taehyung. He just can't. But, hiding from our fears does not make us safe, it makes us live a life of fear that keeps growing in size, which is worse. Worse is good actually, only if he get Taehyung's forgiveness.
"I'm with him for better or for worse, he belongs to me." when he said these lines to Alain, he didn't realise that he's being selfish, he never once ask if Taehyung want the same. If he want him too. All this time he believed in himself that he'll make it, he's the one Jeon wants, but he never once tried to listen what Taehyung wants.
"It'll probably be for worse." Alain replied with a sad smile on his lips, putting a hand on Jeon's shoulder.
"I knew that the day I met him, and I made up my mind that very day that I'll make him happy, but all I did, all I wished for, resulted in his grief and pain." Jeon said.
Jeon fills his glass with martini and picks it up, he turns around to see the ambience of the pub is silent and dark today as no one comes in the morning for drink. The waiters are busy in changing the covers of one big brown expensive couch and wiping the tables. Jeon sighs and turns back to the private counter. He notices the door of the pub opening and closing but his mind is somewhere else.
Jeon is drinking here since early morning and he don't seem to stop just yet. He puts his head on his arms with his elbows bent on the counter and closes his eyes.
"Hey, suit guy!" a voice, voice he could die for, voice he'll do anything to listen to it everyday, yells behind him.
Jeon lifts up his head and turns, expecting to be confronted with an angry Taehyung but what he saw was a pair of gorgeous blue but sad eyes, the same color as the sapphire gem, set in a most gorgeous face with a delicate chiseled jaw. Brown hair shining under the top dim light, making his skin glow. Letting his gaze shift downward in a sudden still silence, Jeon is lost watching the beauty in a tight black shirt showing his sculpted muscles under, the grey denim jeans molded to his hips and thighs.
He'd never in his life's seen anyone so beautiful and perfect as Taehyung. And he's standing here, in his line of the vision, for him, just for him.
