Thundow Oneshots

Cuts

(Trigger warning: Self-Harm.)

(Note: I've never been through this myself or talked about it with anyone who has, so I don't know if this is accurate at all. I'm just guessing here so sorry if this isn't actually what it's like. I've done...a very small amount of research.)

Shadow sat on his knees in the dark alley, shaking, tears running down his face. Drops of blood peppered the snow and dripped from the fresh cut in the bone of his wrist.

Worthless.

Pathetic.

Coward.

Do it.

You know you want to.

You DESERVE it.

You deserve to DIE.

"Sh-shut up." Shadow croaked.

Nobody would care if you died.

Actually, people would be happy.

They've been waiting for you to die.

"N-no...people...they don't...th-they..."

They lie.

They all hate you.

They want you to die.

You should die.

This time, Shadow said nothing. He just stared at the ground, his teeth clenched and shaking even harder.

You're a pathetic coward.

You should die

You should kill yourself right now.

They would be happy. 

They all want you dead. You want to make them happy, right?

Appease your little crush?

He'll NEVER love you back.

So why not do it now?

Why not DIE?

Shadow, hands shaking, picked up the knife again. He held one arm against the ground and put the tip of the knife against it.

Just then, the wall behind him rippled like a disturbed lake, and Thunder stepped through it. It took him a second to process the scene in front of him. His face shifted from neutral to a mingled shock, horror, betrayal, but mostly just sadness. Shadow, seeing Thunder's face, just broke down. Thunder slid quickly to his side to wrap him up in his arms. 

"Are you okay?" He asked shakily.

"No, I'm not 'OKAY'!" Shadow snarled. "I want to FUCKING DIE!"

"Shadow...don't...please don't say that...please..." Tears ran down Thunder's face now, and his voice was quiet and constricted.

"What? It's just the truth..." Shadow's voice was quieter now, breaking as he spoke. "I want to die..."

"Why...?" The simple world carried so much pain, so much despair.

"I...because...because I hate myself. I hate what I've done, and I hate who I am, and I hate that I hate, and it all just...takes over. It's all I feel. I feel nothing but hate. And the only way to distract me...is...is to..." He trailed off, unable to keep going.

"Is to hurt yourself." Thunder finished. "So you feel in control. By hurting yourself outside, you don't have to think about how much you hurt inside."

"Y-yeah. Exactly."

Thunder pulled Shadow's arm towards himself, examining the newest cuts. Shadow didn't say anything, but didn't protest either. Thunder ran his hand above the cuts, glowing green magic forming around them. They slowly stopped bleeding but left several more scars.

"You...need to stop doing this." He said.

"I know. I just...can't. It's like an addiction." Shadow said. "It's the only way I can feel even remotely okay."

"Then I can help you. You need help, and you can't deny that."

"No. I can't. I'm messed up."

Thunder didn't say anything for a bit. After a few seconds, he smiled and pulled Shadow up off the ground, and into his arms. He needed some serotonin. Shadow didn't protest, instead wrapping his arms tightly around Thunder as fresh tears dripped down his face. The pair swayed gently back and forth, entwined tightly. Thunder whispered soothingly.

"Shh, it's okay. You're okay. I'm here. I've got you. I'm here..."