Family Comes First

Chapter 11: Formulating My Plan

 The idea came to me during the middle of the night. I was dreaming that Jimmy had pinned me to the bed and ripped off my clothes. He sneered and chuckled at me as I screamed for help. I was disgusted as his hands roamed all over me.

When I finally woke up, I sat and was thankful that I was not screaming. I did not want to wake Jimmy and have him asking me what was wrong. I preferred him asleep anyway.

He was lying on his back, his lips slightly parted, and his hair tousled. He had deep rhythmic breaths. When he was like this he wasn't a threat to me. The moonlight pouring through the window made the key visible. It raised and lowered with every breath that he took. He had his hand just an inch under the key.

I reached out to touch the key, but he stirred in his sleep. He mumbled something that I could not understand and stretched out his shoulders. I gasped, and my hand shot up over my mouth. My heart pounded in my chest as I watched him settle himself back to sleep.

It was going to be impossible to get the key off of him while he was sleeping. It was too big of a risk to get caught. If he caught me trying to take the key, I would lose all the trust that I have built.

I thought back to my nightmare. It would be the only reason for him to take off all of his clothes, including the key. If I told Jimmy I wanted to have sex, I could convince him to take off the key. If he argued, I could tell him it had to be that way. He would not know any different. If I got the key off of him and then told him I was not ready, he would surely want the key back. I wasn't going to risk that. I was going to have to go all the way.

I looked over at the clock to see that it was 4:30 in the morning. The alarm was going to go off in thirty minutes. I rolled over onto my side and stared at the moon through the bars on the window.

When the alarm went off, Jimmy reached over me and shut it off. He kissed my cheek before rolling out of bed.

"Good morning," he said.

"Morning," I said as I got out of bed.

Jimmy was going through the dresser and handed me a pile of clothes. I ran into the bathroom and changed. I guessed the plaid shirt was Jimmy's because I had to roll up the sleeves. I brushed my hair up into a bun.

I came out of the bathroom to see that Jimmy was wearing his usual T-shirt and jeans. He did not say anything about me changing in the bathroom. I made the bed as Jimmy went into the bathroom.

When Jimmy came out, he stared at me. He curled his fingers in and out, beckoning for me to come closer. I took slow and cautious steps toward him. He pulled me in and reached for my chest. I was about to push him away, but I saw his fingers buttoning up my shirt. He did up two buttons above what I had already done.

"Some of you is only for me," he said before kissing me.

He laced his fingers through mine and we walked downstairs to the kitchen. We were the first ones in the kitchen. Jimmy grabbed the box of cereal off of the top of the fridge and I grabbed a stack of bowls and spoons. Charles came into the kitchen and flashed me a quick smile. Tommy was soon in the kitchen too with his usual smirk.

We ate breakfast mostly in silence. They were quickly out of the house. I cleaned the mess and cleaned the house as I had been for the past week.

All-day I thought about my plan. The bile was rising in the back of my throat every time that I thought about having sex with Jimmy. I would have to stomach it. If I waited here long enough, I would have to do it anyway so I might as well use it to my advantage.

The hours of the day seemed to drag on as they would never end. I scrubbed and cleaned every surface of the house. I checked every lock in the house, but unfortunately, I had not earned enough of their trust yet.

I guessed when I should start cooking dinner again, and I timed it pretty well. A couple of minutes after I had finished, they came into the house. Jimmy and Tommy ran upstairs. Charles washed his hands with a bar of soap at the kitchen sink.

"Hurry up boys before it gets cold," he shouted up the stairs after he was finished.

They came back down the stairs and into the kitchen. I already had the food on the table before they came in, so I sat down in my spot.

They gave me compliments on the smell of the food as they passed it around the table. I never figured out what the chunk of meat was in the freezer, but it was the only meat that I could find. Jimmy was strict on me asking questions, so I left it alone so that I would not be punished.

Dinner whizzed by me without any of them asking me any questions. I could not stop myself from staring at the silver chains around their necks. I imagined myself yanking one off of their necks and running out the door.

I don't even know where I am or where I would go. All I can see out of the front window is the gravel driveway and then a blanket of trees. I was pretty much in the middle of nowhere. I don't even know if I am in New York anymore.

When they got up from the table, I cleaned until Jimmy wrapped his arms around me. He was kissing my shoulder and my neck as I dried off the last couple of dishes. I dried my hands on the towel, and he pulled it out of my grasp.

"Let's go upstairs," he told me as he grabbed my wrist.

He pulled me up the stairs and into his room. He wrapped his arms around me and started to press his lips hard against mine. I did not want to go through with my plan tonight. I needed one more night to prepare myself. I pushed him away with my hands, and he raised an eyebrow at me.

I sat down on the bed and smiled at him. I patted the piece of quilt beside me and Jimmy sat down. I was going to need him to trust me even more before I tried to take the key. I took his rough hand in mine.

"So," I said, letting out a deep breath. It gave me a moment to think. "I want you to tell me a bit about yourself."

"Like what?" Jimmy said with a chuckle.

I shrugged.

"Anything," I said. "You know a bit about me, but I know nothing about you. I just think that I should if we're spending the rest of our lives together."

I had to struggle to not let my voice waver or crack. I was thankful for those years at the orphanage and lying to my foster families as a teenager. Jimmy's lips curled into a smile, so I knew he fell for it.

"I don't know what to say," he said.

"It can be anything," I said. "What did you used to do after dinner before I was here?"

"I played cards with Tommy or read."

"What's your favorite book?"

"Lord of the Flies."

I remembered I was supposed to read that book back in high school. I never read it and guessed every answer on the tests. From what I heard a few of my friends say, it was a violent and disturbing book. No wonder this murderer loves it.

I had to admit that he was much nicer to me than the rest of his family. The only time he punished me was because Charles made him do it. He cleaned me and bandaged me after. Tommy had not hit me either, but his smirk and attitude scared me. Out of all of them, I felt the safest with Jimmy.

"I haven't read it," I said.

"It's really good," he said. "I have a copy if you want to read it. Like after you're done your chores. I've read it a lot, so it is a little beat up, but it's still the same words."

"You really do like it then."

"Yeah. Every time we go into town I look for a new copy."

"Into town?"

"Yeah. We go to the closest town every couple of weeks to get supplies and food. Dad and Tommy are going to go in a couple of days, so we'll have the house to ourselves."

My stomach twisted at the thought. I don't know what Jimmy would do to me if we were in the house all alone. I had to go through with my plan before that happened.

"That's nice," was all I managed to say.

My mind was made. I was going to go through with my plan tomorrow night.