ANIMOBF

CHAPTER 43 - RECONCILIATION AND KINDNESS

>>> VALDEZ-REYES RESIDENCE <<<

"I think it's time we talked." Beatriz muttered.

Alyssa nodded...a five-minute silence then followed.

"I think for this to work one of us needs to start talking." Alyssa spoke up.

Beatriz looked down and nervously picked at her nails she made a promise to herself not to get angry because she was tired and just wanted things to go back to the way they were.

"How long have you felt like this?" Alyssa finally asked.

Beatriz quickly glanced at her mother then looked back down and shrugged slightly. It took her a while to answer Alyssa just sat there and waited.

"Pretty much since you told me about her that's when it started." Beatriz finally answered.

"Bea you've felt like this for a few months? Why didn't you tell me?" Alyssa asked feeling like crap that not only did she not notice but she hadn't noticed for a long time.

Beatriz just shrugged again.

"I couldn't tell you mom...I didn't want to do that to you."

"What do you mean?"

"I know it doesn't seem like it but I do know how much this has meant to you...to find the daughter you gave up. You looked so happy and a part of me was happy but I think a bigger part hated it more. All my feelings and thoughts about it all are so confusing and I just got so tired of being confused. I took it out on you. With everything with Maddie and Jhoana and now with Jia and everything with you and Samantha it just got too much. I just felt like we were growing apart because you had Samantha. Because she's your real daughter and I felt like we were losing that thing that made us Alyssa and Beatriz." Beatriz rambled.

"You know when you were born, I was so terrified. I was scared that because you weren't biologically mine that it would be hard for us to be mother and daughter. But the moment I saw you I just knew that you were mine. Genetics has nothing to do with it and it's the same with Ced. You girls might not be a 'Valdez' by blood but you are a 'Valdez' in your heart and in mine. The same way Marck is a Reyes."

"And what about Samantha?" Beatriz asked.

"Samantha is a Bernardo. I may have given birth to her but I didn't raise her...she's my daughter biologically but she's Irene and Noli's daughter not mine. She doesn't see me as her mother because I'm not." Alyssa told her.

"But you want her to be."

"Of course, I did. Like I've been telling you Beatriz, giving her up was so hard for me. But I knew deep down that it was the right thing to do. I'm content to being her friend and just being a part of her life but I'm never going to be her mother." Alyssa added.

Beatriz sat there for a while thinking about all that has been said.

"I miss us." She finally mumbled.

"I miss us too." Alyssa whispered back.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you about me and Jhoana."

"Why didn't you?" Alyssa asked.

"It wasn't to hurt you...or punish you even if it seemed like it...we just wanted some time to figure ourselves out." Beatriz replied.

"And to not have the open-door policy?" Alyssa asked and raised her eyebrow.

Beatriz looked away as her cheeks turned a little pink.

"I have no idea what you're talking about."

Alyssa couldn't help the smile that appeared on her face the first genuine smile for a while.