Waves - Book #2 [completed]

35 ~ Alexithamia

Alexithamia
noun
The inability to express your feelings.

"Where are we going?"

"To see koalas. I told you like five times now." I run my hand through my hair, trying to tug it behind my ear. I forgot to bring a hair tie, but Riley pulls one off her wrist and hands it to me with a tight lip and narrowed eyes.

I grin. She'll never know that I've planned this whole day. Not the exact day because I didn't know when we would get to it, but I planned the activities, did a little research and now here we are on our way to our first date in my car because I don't trust Riley's truck. Frankly, it looks like it might disintegrate any moment. But I'd never tell her.

I'll also never tell her how extremely nervous I am.

First, we'll go to see koalas at s sanctuary and then go get ice cream and eat it while taking a walk on the beach a few towns over. If she's up to it, I even have a dinner spot picked out.

Riley huffs in the passenger seat next to me, folding her arms over her chest. Even agitated, she looks beautiful. She always does, I know, but today she looks less weighed down. After our night together and our talk I was afraid that she'd push me away, change how she views me, maybe even project every negative feeling and emotion onto me. But she didn't. Instead, I have the feeling that the more I hold back the more she feels drawn to me.

I'm not gonna lie. Holding back is the hardest thing I've ever done.

"Okay, let me rephrase," Riley says. "Where are we going to see koalas?"

I don't answer and just shake my head. She groans.

It's so fun.

~~~

The sanctuary I looked up a couple days ago is small but well maintained. It's run by donations and volunteers who take in injured koalas and pep them up before releasing them into the wild again. There are still a few animals that had suffered from the bushfires last year and need to be nursed before they can be released.

Ever since we got here, Riley's been clutching my hand like she's afraid to lose me in the non-existing crowd. It's one of the best feelings in the world and I dare to imagine that we're a real couple for the time being. I kiss her cheek a couple times and watch her make googly-eyes at a mama-koala with a baby attached to its front who's chewing fresh eucalyptus.

Riley gasps when the baby koala moves. "Look. Oh my God, my heart. I can't. Look!"

"It's like you have never seen koalas before," I remark, stilling her pawing at my arm. "Wait! Have you?"

"Of course I've seen koalas before," Riley murmurs without looking away from the fluffy animals. "But they're just so adorable. Look!"

Smiling, I pull her into me until her back is flush with my chest, hook my free arm around her and dip my head, breathing in the fresh, masculine cologne that had made me weak months ago. It-