The Colorful Path

Chapter Six: Red; Love And Anger Part II

The following morning, I wake up on the couch in the same dress I was wearing last night. I have this pounding headache and the side of my face feels sore. What happened last night? Why am I on the couch?

I walk into the bedroom to see Samuel not in it. I then walk into the bathroom and begin to wash my face. I look up into the mirror to see this big bruise on the side of my face. I gently touch it to feel how sore it really is. It hurts like all hell.

Then my memory hits me, just like Samuel did, all at once. That's what happened last night. I was drinking at the party with Beth and Samuel came and saw me naked in bed after Beth and I-Oh my God. Beth and I hooked up? Beth and I hooked up?? What the actually fuck? Then after that Samuel took me home and we argued, then he hit me.

I change my clothes and then walk out in the living room to see no one. I walk out onto the back porch to see Samuel sitting in the chair. He doesn't even look at me, just stares out into the city.

"Good morning." I mutter.

He doesn't even glance at me. He is still very upset with me. I don't blame him.

"Hey, I just wanted to apologize. You were right, I wasn't thinking at all." I pause to see him looking in my direction. "I should not have gone to that party, but listen. What you saw wasn't planned or anything like that. I was drinking and feeling a sort of way and it led to what you saw, but please understand how deeply sorry I am about it. I love you, Samuel. Please forgive me."

Samuel sighs as he stands up from the chair and walks over to me. He looks down into my eyes and sighs.

"I don't think you understand how much I love you and how much it hurts me to see you with someone else. The fact that I saw you with a girl hurts even more because there's nothing I can do if you're a lesbian,"

"But I am not a lesbian. I was drunk and I am sorry. It won't happen again. I won't speak to Beth anymore or party or drink anymore, just please forgive me."

"I will only forgive you if you really mean it by you won't speak to Beth anymore and you don't talk to any girl anymore."

I thought that this was a dramatic request, but I am desperate to have Samuel forgive me. He is my life and my love. I can't live without him.

"I promise."

Samuel wraps his arms around me and holds me tight. I know I got him to forgive me, but something doesn't feel right. I don't feel right about this and I don't know why.

"Can we talk about how you hit me?" I cautiously ask.

"Hit you?" Samuel responds like he has never knew anything. "Why would you think I hit you?"

I can feel my facial expression change. He's making me second guess my memory.

"When we were arguing when we got home, you hit my face." I recall.

Samuel then puts his hand by my sore cheek. "Princess, I know your memory is a little foggy from the alchohol, but I never would lay a hand on you." He pauses. "I am actually kind of hurt you would accuse me of something like that."

He seems so hurt and genuine. The gentle touch of his hand on my face is the Samuel that I know and love. He has never hurt me before. Maybe he's right.

"I just-"

"Baby girl, you were too drunk when we got home. As I was walking to our room, you stumbled and fell on the floor. I think you may have hit your face on the couch or something." Samuel then kisses my cheek. "Does that make it feel any better?"

I force a smile on my face. "A little."

"I'm sorry that your memory is off. Maybe you've learned that drinking and parties aren't your thing."

"You're right. They weren't even my thing in high school." I pause. "And I shouldn't have gone last night."

"You shouldn't have." Samuel says without any emotion in his tone. "I'm going to make us breakfast if you want to take a shower and clean up."

"I will."

I know I just changed clothes, but I just threw on some sweat pants. I walk into the bathroom and turn on the shower.

Did everything that I remember from last night didn't happen? I feel my cheek and it still feel sore. I don't think I have ever fallen so hard onto anything for it to hurt this badly.

I stripe down all of my clothes and then walk into the hot steamy water. I begin to bathe myself and mainly focus on getting the smeared make up off of my face.

It's so weird to think about. I can still feel Beth's tounge in between my thighs. It feels as real as the sore on my face. I don't get how my memory can be so on point with everything that happened all the way up until Samuel and I were arguing in the living room. I also don't get why he would be so upset by me making out with a girl. Isn't it every guy's fantasy for their girlfriend to be with another girl?

Even so, it didn't mean anything. I love him and Beth was just a friend that I got drunk with. I really don't want to lose her, but I can't lose Samuel. I love Samuel and I've been with him for so long and planned to be with him my entire life. How could I let a girl I barley know come between that? I have to let go of Beth, for Samuel and I. I just have to.

Nothing is fair in love and war, and there isn't even anything to fight about for her.