Kiss The Boy - descendants

Prologue

I want to be where the people are...

Shit, no!
Everyone's crazy in Auradon.
Always happy, singing and dancing like their having the time of their life. Kind of like they're on Fever all the time... and maybe a few are. I sure am sometimes.

But this is not what I intended to tell you... I had this whole speech planned out perfectly...
But who am I kidding?
Seriously, my brain is getting all mushy right now, maybe too much of Gillian's unique blend.....  I mean, we can at least pretend it's because of the weed and not just standard setting.

Wait!

Auradon and the Isle of the lost. I remember... I wanted to introduce you to this shithole I call home, as well as the even worse shithole that's supposed to be the only actual shithole...

I never really cared about the whole villains and heroes thing. If it were for me, one of the firsts to send to the isle would have been prince Chad, so I wouldn't have to endure him every single day, but sadly I'm not the one to decide on that. Wrong kingdom.

But back on track now, I want to be done with this; there's a booty call waiting for me.

So once upon a time,  some kingdoms decided it was a good idea to unite all kingdoms into one big, whatever you want to call it. So the United States Of Auradon was founded to protect each other from the evil that had haunted the realms. Who exactly were the big players, and how did that all happen... I don't fucking care. Just read your goddammit history books!

All the villains of the stories.. which is the point I have to disagree with Mal claiming that there are the real stars of the stories, but they aren't that interesting at all, were banned to the isle of the lost under a spell, which supposed to strip them of all magic.. until a specific, adorable boy, that is now my lovely boyfriend, poked the magic dome to get better Tv... but that's a different story,  his not mine, so ask him about that.

Anyways... One day our very own soon-to-be king Ben decided it was time to give the next generation of villains the chance to go to Auradon Prep; what lucky bastards. Thus, the four handpicked candidates were brought to us. That's where this story should start, but I completely forgot to introduce myself and the gang. How are you supposed to cheer for my problems when you have no clue who I am? It would have been wise to start with that instead of the crappy history lesson. Sorry. Nut guess it's too late for that now, so we have to live with this weird order.

Whatever.

We are the designated scum of Auradon.
First, there's Ad. Found her someday in the woods wandering around in aw,  high like a kite, and since then, I look have looked at her.
She's got difficulties articulation herself properly and tendand s towards randomly talking gibberish, which caused most of our precious classmates to make fun of her. But she had clear phases, too, and during them, she doesdidn'te. That's exactly what I like most about the tiny wonderlander.

Then there's Gillian, my best friend since forever. He's Grumpy's son and living the hell out of his family trait.
You don't want to get on his wrong side because he can get quite passive-aggressive, and that's quite an ominous sign. He gets all moody around people, but he still manamanagesget into almost every prince's pants. That's why I like to call him Sir fuck-a-lot.

And last but not least, there's me.
I'm a prince, not the Prince of smoke., although that's the nickname I was given by Sir fuck-a-lot.

I'm what happened after a mermaid fell in love with a prince. And no, I don't have that kind of tail, but I like how you are thinking. I can appreciate a kinky audience.

But hell, I am not a fish! I'm not too fond of water, and I actually despise the sea wholeheartedly. It's wet and salty in all the wrong kind of way, and I honestly don't like things with no visible end.

I'm getting exhausted just thinking of diving down to the ground where my grandfather lives. Besides that, I am also not able to swim. Like at all. My mom just thought I would be natural at that but surprise! I'm a freaking paddling puppy, trying not to drown. I'm sure as hell will deny the sea's existence and Atlantica as its whole until the end of time.

So... that would be it.
Everybody on campus ignores us all the time because we're a disgrace to their ideals until they need someone to pick on. And NOW that we have etablished the background, I can start to tell the real story. My story.