Rainbow | Markhyuck

twenty

Donghyuck sighed a breath of relief as he reached his front door. He adored Renjun, don't get him wrong, but something about someone having a breakdown over the exact same thing you're struggling with was exhausting. He felt as if someone really had stacked just piles upon piles of bricks and stones on his back, ready for him to falter and crash, never to get up again. Not that he wouldn't mind that right now.

He shuffled his key out of his pocket, slotting it into the lock. He turned and unlocked his door, heaving his weight to open it. The door had always been a challenge at his unfortunately ancient-ass home, he guessed he just forgot how hard to push to get it open this time.

He huffed, shutting the door behind him before flicking his eyes to the ghost before him. Mark was sat at their dining table, trying to push over the candle holder at the centre. Donghyuck sighed, making his way over to the seat beside him, slumping into it and crumpling like paper. "Eomma home?"
Mark hummed before grunting a little as his hand went through the candle holder. "Dunno, I think so."

Donghyuck nodded, going to lie his head on Mark's shoulder, fully prepared to just melt into his side before he froze. He swallowed sharply, pretending like he wasn't doing anything and letting his head fall down on the table.
Mark snorted, side eyeing him for a moment before going back to what he was trying to do. "I saw that."
"No you didn't," Donghyuck grumbled, moving his arms onto the table and curling up as comfortably as he could.
"It's okay," Mark smiled, "I tried to greet your mom earlier yesterday, cause I forgot, and she just walked straight through me."
He giggled to himself, looking down to Donghyuck expecting a similar reaction. His smile vanished pretty quickly as Donghyuck simply stared back up at him with glassy eyes.

"Yeah," Donghyuck nodded, slowly lifting his head off the table, staring at or through or whatever at Mark. Did it even matter, he wasn't there. "Cause you're dead. You're not alive, are you." He bit down hard on his lip, blinking and swallowing away whatever was trying to come up. "You never will be alive again...will you?"
Mark stared back at him for a small moment before nodding his head, inadvertently tightening the knot that had tied itself in Donghyuck's chest. "You're right." He took a breath. "You coming to terms with it? Cause I'm not really here, Hyuckie, and I'll be gone gone very soon."
Donghyuck sighed, nodding his head for a little before immediately dismissing it and shaking his head rapidly. Just cause he was lying to everyone else doesn't mean he should lie to Mark.
"No. I...I don't want- you're still here though, aren't you? And until I can't see you anymore you're still alive." Donghyuck sucked in his bottom lip for a short moment, trying to orientate himself again. To focus on Mark again as if he were whole, just as he was. "Is that okay, at least for now?"
He watched Mark look back ahead of himself at the candle holder again, reaching back out to push it again though hesitant. He clenched his fist, nodding once sharply before attempting to push over the holder again.

Donghyuck sat straight, watching Mark try over and over trying to push the candle, grab it, shake it, anything, and failing over and over again. If Mark was alive, Mark could've swung the damn thing over his head. If Mark was here, he would've been able to pick up the damn pen from his desk. If Mark was here, he would've still been able to hug him as tightly as he used, no matter how much he whined. If Mark was still alive, he would've been able to melt into him over and over again. So why couldn't he pick up the fucking candle holder already?

Donghyuck took in a short breath, silently trying to hold back tears to not alarm the boy beside him. He swallowed down whatever gross shit was in his throat and blinked back the tears that were trying so hard to come out as if they had not been doing that every night for the past few months.

Mark huffed, slumping in his seat with a defeated look. "I...I-I can't do this." He shut his eyes tightly before slumping his head onto Donghyuck's chest. "Why can't I do this?"
He hiccupped a little, masking Donghyuck's. The older male sighed, subtly rubbing his head against Donghyuck's chest.
Donghyuck simply stared down, reaching up and patting (or at least attempting to pet) his head in comfort, "It's okay, hyung." 

Mark sighed again, taking Donghyuck's free hand into own, Donghyuck going along with it cause he could only see it, not feel it. Mark laced his fingers through Donghyuck's, holding his hand. Donghyuck shakily curled his fingers onto Mark's. He didn't know if it was right though. Whether the pressure was right, whether he was even holding Mark at all. He didn't even know if Mark could feel him either.
Donghyuck pursed his lips, still looking down upon him. "You alright, hyung?"
Mark opened his eyes, staring at the interlocked hands with an indecipherable expression. He took a deep breath, giving a pitying smile to himself. "Yeah."

"Donghyuck. What are you doing?"
Donghyuck's eyes darted up to his mother, who appeared to be staring at him confusion. Mark immediately pulled away from Donghyuck on reflex, however seemed to pause a moment. Donghyuck couldn't address him just yet though. "Hm?"
His mother stared down at Mark's seat then back up at her son with sorrow in her eyes, prompting Donghyuck to internally roll his. So that's what she meant. "Hyung's just trying to move things."
"How many times do I have to tell you, sweetheart?" his mother made her way to the table, placing his tea cup down. "He's not here."
The lady attempted to sit down on the already pulled out seat but was quickly stopped by her son, Donghyuck shouting for her to stop and placing his arm over Mark's lap.

Mrs Bahng froze for a moment at Donghyuck's raised voice, not used to it after so many weeks had passed by. She placed her hand on the top of the back of Mark's chair, leaning closer to her son and observing his face in worry. "He's not here-"
"HE IS!" he snapped back. Donghyuck glared back at her, still covering Mark's seat. He could see Mark cast his eyes down to the side, his image flickering once again. Donghyuck grit his teeth. "Just cause you can't see him doesn't mean he's not here."
Mrs Bahng looked back at him, most likely disappointed and upset that her dumb son couldn't get over his stupid friend's death, hallucinating someone that looked like him probably.

At least Donghyuck knew he was real. At least Donghyuck knew he wasn't insane.

Was he?

Mark sighed, shaking his head. He gently left a peck on his arm before his image faded to nothing.
"No, plea-" Donghyuck whimpered as Mark disappeared, glancing down to his empty hand now. He clenched and unclenched his hand, a few stray tears falling from eyes as he stared down in disbelief. He retracted his other hand from the seat, curling it into his lap.

Mrs Bahng attempted to console her distraught son but was pushed away by a simple shoulder roll, making her retract her hand. He didn't want anyone to touch him, and with his mother refusing for him to be alone, Donghyuck just let her watch him fall apart all over again, holding onto his shirt and quietly sobbing in his seat.