'stunning, remarkable, entertaining.' - joris bohnson
'a real page-turner. you will never get bored of this exciting story.' - lana del armadillo
⚠️⚠️⚠️TW: words, sentences, the english language, heterophobia, cisphobia, racist language towards whit...
author's note (the only real one in this damn book😭😭😭)
HIIIII OMG it's been like a good year and a half since i last wrote in here and yes this is actually one of the ONLY serious things im gonna actually write in this book LMAO but i honestly just wanted to say a massive thank you to everyone who's been reading and enjoying the shed eeran chronicles so far, to be completely honest i literally started writing this book COMPLETELY as a joke and it was legit full of just silly inside jokes between me and some of my online friends where im surprised so many of you even read it when the vast majority of it started off as inside jokes😭and i would NEVER in a million years have expected a book that i started writing as a joke and only showing to a small circle of friends to ever reach 8 THOUSAND VIEWS????? WTF?? 😭 so thank you to everyone who's been loving and showing support to my book so far, sorry for the huge lack of shed updates i have been busy with school uni exams work life etc but do not worry i'm finished with my first year of university for the time being so look forward to many more chapters to come!!!! but for now enjoy your fav main character vibes girlie(slash boylie slash nonbinaryie slash dreamgenderie🙄🙄)'s iconic comeback!!! seems like shed has a lot to fill you guys in on...
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shed's pov
guys its been a hella long time let me tell u whats been happening since we last spoke.
first of all ive decided to change race. im so jealous of how oppressed white people are and how my dark, rich, melanin filled skin could never reach the level of exotic-ness and rare beauty and oppression that caucasians have😢😢😢😢
this is an example of my 'before' picture, before i transitioned to white
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so i'm thinking of changing name to something like emily rose but im not sure if that sounds white enough :///////////////////////
then my bae drake suggested i change it to emily-mae-rose-louise-leigh- chlamydia-virginity-felony-arson-gonorrhoea which i think is perfect!! 🥰
now i need to choose some slurs that i can use. i need to collect them all like gems. so far am thinking of 'milk' 'white' 'blanc' 'snow' 'cloud' 'chalk' 'yoghurt' 'opposite of black' btw this is a reminder not to use these slurs as they are already claimed by white people like myself.
then i took out the Jamaican, Nigerian, Congolese, Ghanaian, Papua New Guinean, Sri Lankan, Malaysian and Bangladeshi flags out of my bio on tiktwitterinstasnapbookfacepinteresttokcord 💔
i hope u can all respect me coming out as transracial... the popular girls at school don't... they keep calling me something, what's the word again, artistic????????????????? i don't get what my transracialism has to do with picasso?? :/
i'm nearly ready to become white now the final step is the transracial surgery which is booked in for the 02827th of decanuaryprilemberulyunegust
the second thing that's happened to me is that i went to my prom recentky
