I told the stars about you 《DNF》

Chapter \18/

TW: Mention of suicide, suicidal thoughts, suicide

I recommend playing the saddest song you know

Clay didn't leave his room for a month, he was severally damaged on the inside

It was time for him to go back home but he just couldn't leave

He was depressed since the day George died

He didn't eat, didn't talk, didn't do anything

He still took the medications and did his treatments cause he promised George

They never let him see George for the last time

He hated everything and everyone

He felt the guilt, he blamed himself for the tragedy

Dreams pov:

I can't do this anymore...

It's all my fault...

I've been suffering for so long now, I just can't do this

My only motivation left, it was George

He kept me going, I'm thankful that I got to be with him not for long but still

I'm lying on my bed, thinking about the same person I've been thinking this past month

I stand up, grab my coat and run out of my room

I go up the stairs and open the door to the roof...

I remember everything that I felt here

This was an incredible moment that I'll never forget

I just wish that me and him could look at the stars one last time

I just...want him back...

I take a big breath of the fresh cold air

This feels surreal

I stare at the park, and remember every little convo we had

"AAAAAAAAAAA" I yell on top of my lungs and break down

All the tears stream down my face, I histericaly sob into my hands

I'm on the edge of the rooftop, I'm sitting on the soft white snow

I look up at the stars, I usually feel mesmerised or taken away by the stars

But now...now I don't feel anything

My watery eyes sparkle from the moonlight

I'm still looking up and going closer to the edge

I lost myself again...

Before I met George my life was so miserable, I even attempted a couple of times..

"George was my everything..." I tell the stars

"I loved him...I really did"

"George you were the most beautiful person"

"I would do anything to be with you"

"You were the smartest, I still don't know how could you fit all of the information you knew into your head" A tear rolls down my face through my smile

"I don't know if I ever told you this..."

"The first time I ever saw you was when I just came to this hospital, I saw your precious face through a small crack between the doorway and the door"

"God I want to go back in time and re live all this and save you"

"I thought we would last at least a year.."