Light at the end of a tunnel

Chapter fifteen-Joke is on you, lovebirds

"GUYS, GET UP NOW! COME ON GET UP!", Jack and Nick screamed at me and Kellin. I groaned and rolled over, desperate for more sleep. If you can't tell, I am not a morning person.

"I'M SERIOUS! WAKE UP!", Jack yelled.

"JACK, GO AWAY!", Kellin said, throwing a pillow at him and Nick.  

I chuckled. I guess he is not a morning person either.

"We are not going to be late for our show just because you refuse to get up."

Kellin and I quickly jumped up, as Gabe, Nick, Jack, and Justin started laughing at us.

"What?", asked Kellin.

"We don't really have a show"

"I hate you guys.", I announced, laying back down on the couch.

"NO!", Gabe yelled at me, "We don't have a show tonight, let's go out and do something"

"Like?"

"We could go out to the movies?", Nick suggested.

Flashbacks of my disturbing dream began to race through my mind. I could not go the movies, I just could not. But if the guys wanted to go, why should I stop them? They've took me in and helped me and became my best friends, couldn't I at least suck it up and go to the movies?

No you can not.

"What do you think Hope?

"What?", I ask, slowly coming back from my thoughts.

"About the movies?"

"No we said we weren't going to the movies, what about the fair? Wait.. Did you want to go to the movies?"

"No", I said too quickly, "I mean, the fair sounds nice"

"Then lets go"

The guys began getting ready as did I. I grabbed my suitcase and went to the bathroom, then I began searching through the clothes the guys had bought me, thinking of what to wear. Okay, the guys did not pick out my clothes, but they did give me money to buy new clothes with. I thought about wearing a dark blue floral sundress, however it was strapless and would show my scars and bruises. My bruises were actually healed but if you looked closely, you could see them.  Did I want everyone to see them? To see how weak I am?

No I didn't.  So instead I wore dark skinny jeans and a simple royal blue diy tank top with a pair of black Vans.

"Hope? You ready?", Justin asked.

"Yeah.", I said walking out of the bathroom.

********

When we got there, I regretted my choice of clothing. Yes, the sundress would have showed all of my ugly scars and bruises but at least I wouldn't feel like I was living in Death Valley, which got as hot as 134 degrees once. The air was suffocating and I craved to feel some type of breeze. I could not handle the torrid weather.

"You okay?", Kellin asked me.

I stared into his eyes for a moment before answering, "uhh.. Yeah, I'm fine. It's just really hot."

"Which is why we should go get a snow cone!", Justin recommended.  

We walked to where the snow cones were being sold. Kellin purchased a cherry snow cone. Jack and Gabe bought the lime snow cone, and me and Nick settled  with strawberry. Justin ordered the Leche which was vanilla ice cream flavored with cinnamon, and according to Justin tasted a lot better than it sounded.

After that, we rode the bumper cars and Gee-Whiz, which was one of my favorite rides. Next we ate good but greasy corndogs and sweet funnel cake, with a nice cold bottle of water.

Then Justin betted Gabe that he could bust more balloons than Gabe could. Accepting the challenge, Gabe went to go prove him wrong.

Thinking that they were both stupid Jack and Nick went to watch, leaving me and Kellin alone together. We rode a few more rides. On our way to go find the guys, we passed an older man that resembled Austin a lot, which freaked me out. It suddenly became hard to breathe and I was feeling sick to my stomach.

"Hope? Are you okay?"

"I.. I..", I struggled to speak.

"Come on, lets sit down."

We sat down on a near by bench. My head was spinning in circles with memories of Austin and I felt like vomiting. Kellin was talking to me, trying to see if I needed anything and telling me to just relax and that I would be okay, but I could not reply. Every time I opened my mouth to talk, the words suddenly left and I had no idea what I was doing. I closed my eyes, ignoring the world around me.

It is okay, Hope.

That was not Austin, you're fine.

He can't hurt you anymore.

Pull yourself together.

I took a long deep breath and somehow managed to calm down.

Although I felt calmer, I did not feel better or safer. I kept remembering Austin, the beatings he gave me and even my Mom. The things he forced me to do, the things I did not want to do, things teenagers or anyone shouldn't be forced to do.

I rested my head on Kellin's chest, he traced his fingers on my back still trying to calm me down.

"I'm sorry.", I apologized looking up at Kellin.

He pushed my bangs out of my face, "Don't apologize. Are you okay?" 

"I am now.", I told him, burying my face in his chest once again.

And for the next hour, we sat there just like that, caught up in our thoughts about each other.