Light at the end of a tunnel

Chapter Twenty nine- Time to Take Action

(KELLINS POV)

I cradled a very cranky Copeland in my arms , as I hummed a lullaby to her. She continued to whine, occasional tears falling from her hazel eyes. I felt my heart break into a million pieces, I couldn't stand seeing and hearing her cry. Seeing my baby girl cry made me want to cry. She missed Hope, I could tell and I did too. It had been two days since she left us and everyday became harder and harder. I could see something and I wanted to tell Hope, but then I realized she was gone. I wanted to tell her something and I would get ready to, but then I realize she's gone and my world just crashes down on me and the pain of her being gone hits twice as hard as before.

Copeland let out another cry. I laid her on my shoulder and rubbed her back softly, which was something that calmed her down. Hope was the same way. I could recall all the times I would rub her back when she became stressed out or when she was really irritable during her pregnancy.

However this time it didn't work and Copeland cried more. I walked downstairs with her and fixed her a bottle. I walked around the kitchen with Copeland, waiting for her bottle to be done. When it finally was, I got the pink bottle and went back upstairs. Sitting down in the wooden rocking chair, I rocked Copeland back and fourth as I fed her. She ate hungirly. I smiled at her and how happy she looked to have her bottle. After finishing the entire bottle, Copeland fell asleep in my arms. I watched her sleep for a few minutes, not believing how lucky I was to not only have a daughter, but a son. I felt an overwhelming sense of love, I love my kids. And it pained me to watch them cry for Hope. Sure, all new borns were cranky and just mainly cried, but I had a feeling JR and Copeland didn't always just cry because they were hungry or tired, but also because they missed Hope. And I did too. I felt like I was going insane without her.

I laid Copeland in her crib. After checking on JR, I went to my bedroom and climbed into the large soft bed. I stared at the picture of Hope and I in the hospital with JR and Copeland. She looked so exhausted and drained, but her eyes were shining and a beautiful smile was spread across her face. I flipped the light off and laid down, knowing it would be a long night.

***************
I was grabbing JR a diaper, when I heard a knock on the door.

"Come in!", I yelled as I quickly changed his diaper, which was something I was starting to get pretty skilled at.

The door swung opened and Nick and his fiancé, Sophia, came in. Sophia gushed at Copeland and immediately picked her up from the blue play pin.

" She's so cute!"

I smiled, "Thanks."

"Awe. And how's this big guy doing?", Sophia said, lightly poking his stomach. JR's lips moved, almost as if smiling at her.

" Did you see that? He smiled at me! They are so adorable! I definitely call being babysitter"

Nick and I both lightly chuckled at her. She rolled her eyes playfully while looking at Nick. Then she looked at me and said, "I'm serious."

"Have you heard from Jack?", Nick questioned, changing the subject.

I sighed, " No. I called him a few times and he didn't answer, I figured he wanted to be alone."

"He did. He's been so distant lately, but who can blame him? Poor guy.", Sophia said.

I nodded, " And when does the funeral start?"

"About an hour"

"I should go get ready then. Care to watch them? I won't be to long."

"Sure. Go ahead."

"Thanks."

Sophia grinned, "Well I am the babysitter."

**************
It was depressing. The funeral was. But then again it was a funeral, it wasn't supposed to be cheerful. Everyone gathered around the casket, a large picture of Jack and Jenna stood on display beside it. They looked so happy. Smiling and holding each other.

Sophia and Nick were holding JR and Copeland, while I walked up to the casket and patted Jack on the back.

"I'm really sorry, man", I told him honestly.

Jack barely nodded. He was so upset. But who could blame him? I couldn't imagine losing Hope, although she was gone she wasn't entirety gone. I couldn't imagine attending her funeral, planning it, and everything. As a matter of fact, I refused to even think about that.

I looked down at the casket and instead of seeing Jenna's face, I saw Hope. I saw Hope lying there in that casket. When I saw the picture of Jack and Jenna, it suddenly turned into a picture of me and Hope.
When I looked at Jack, who was crying silently, I saw myself standing there crying. I looked around at people crying. Jenna's friends and parents were crying and suddenly Jenna's friends simply turned into Hope's friends. Jenna's Mom's  sobs were suddenly my Mom lightly crying, as she held JR in her arms. Jenna's nephew, Brayden, stood beside Jack, unsure of what exactly was happening. Then all of a sudden, Brayden turned into JR. JR stood there uncertain of what was happening. I turned around and could see Sophia comforting a confused and crying Copeland.

I shook my head, making those thoughts disappear. I couldn't imagine that happening. I didn't want to. I saw Jack collapse into a chair, his head buried in his hands and I knew I had to get Hope home, I had too.
If I didn't, this would easily turn into her funeral.