Light at the end of a tunnel

Chapter Thirty- The Plan

(KELLINS POV)

One month.
JR and Copeland were officially one month old today. It seemed just like yesterday Hope nervously told me that she was pregnant.
Sure, every parent says that, even my Mother told me that when I graduated, and she reminded me of it when she watched my band perform for the very first time, and when I told her that she would be a grandma. However it was true. Your kids will grow up amazingly fast, like a blink of an eye. And the worst part was that Hope wasn't even here to see it.

She didn't get to see JR and Copeland grow.
She didn't get to see how long Copeland's light brown hair was growing. She didn't get to see how big Copeland was getting, or how she would curl up into a ball while sleeping.
Hope didn't get to witness how much JR resembled herself. She didn't get to see how JR's dark hair was growing too, or how he would smile when I talked to him about Hope.
And if that isn't fair, then I don't know what is.

I sat on the couch playing with Copeland, while JR slept peacefully upstairs. Copeland smiled brightly as I tickled her stomach.
Then the front door opened, revealing Justin and Gabe.

I pressed my finger to my lips, "JR is asleep"
They nodded, understanding.

"We just came back from Jacks. Thought we'd stop by"

"How is he?",  I asked Justin.

"We're lucky if we can get him out of his bedroom.", Justin replied honestly.
I couldn't imagine how Jack was feeling right now and to be honest, I tried not to. Because if I did, Jenna would suddenly turn into Hope again. I would be Jack, except I wouldn't mourn the love of my life's loss, I had to keep going. I had to a responsible father for my kids.
After that thought, I couldn't stop thinking. What if I was a single Dad? What would I tell JR and Copeland in the future?
The truth of course, you idiot.
How would they respond? How could I help them? I sighed, not wanting to think about any of that.

" You alright, man? You kinda dazed out there"

I nodded, "I'm fine."

I looked at Copeland, "I can't believe she's already a month old"

"Me either. They grow up so fast"

"Tell me about it"

What if Hope wasn't here to see that? What if she didn't make it home? What if she didn't get to see their first day of school? What about when JR gets his first girlfriend? And when Copeland gets her first boyfriend? I chuckled to myself, yeah. Like I'm going to let my babies date.
Yeah right.

"Kellin?", Gabe asked, hitting me in the shoulder.

" What?"

"Are you sure you're okay? You keep dazing off"

"I'm fine, guys", I told them honesty.
I was fine. I was going to be fine, because I had a plan. A plan to save my family.

"Well I have a date with Sophie. She'll kill me if I'm late, so we better get going.", Gabe announced. Then his phone rang.

"Hey babe", Gabe said into the phone, " No I won't be late. Yes, I promise. Yeah I'm at Kellins. Yeah I know we have a reservation in fifteen minutes, no I won't be late. Yes, sweetheart, I know you'll kill me if I'm late again. I love you too"
I chuckled. Gabe and Sophie have been dating for a couple of years and she still amazes me.

Gabe hung up the phone, "I have fifteen minutes to get to my house that's thirty minutes away if traffic is good. Let's go. Now"

"See ya, dude"

"See ya, guys", I told them. Justin left, Gabe ran out quickly behind him, slamming the door. I heard JR cry from upstairs.

"Assholes", I muttered.
Oh well. JR was going to have to get up soon anyways, we had a lot to do in very little time.

*******************
I pulled into the parking lot, feeling my nerves increase. I looked behind me, Copeland and JR both were fast asleep in their car seats. The weather was getting cold and it began to drizzle down rain. I hated the thought of getting them out in this nasty weather.

" Excuse me? Officer?", I asked getting out of the car.

"Yes? Is there a problem?"

"Oh no. I'm just here to see Detective Charles, I'd hate to get my kids out in this weather for a five minute visit. Would you mind staying them for a few minutes?"

"No not at all."

"Thank you, I won't be long."

The officer nodded and I walked quickly into the FBI building. The warm heat instantly greeted me and I sighed happily. Warmth.

"Mr. Quinn, can I help you?", Detective Matthews asked. Detective Matthews was a smart detective, who helped out occasionally on Hopes case. He was a bald middle aged man with a tall athletic build and gray eyes.

" Uh, I'm just here to see Charles"

"We just switched shifts, he should be in his office"

"Thanks"

"Not a problem. How are the kids?"

"They are great."

"Good good. They grow up fast, you know"

I nodded, "Yeah. I know."

I knocked on Charles's door. Nothing.
So of course, like any normal person would do, I walked in. There was a huge brown desk in the middle of the small room with a huge bullention board and dry erase board beside it each other. They both had pictures and notes scribbled all over them. I took my attention away from that and headed towards the file cabinet, the real reason why I was here. I scanned them quickly, expecting Charles to burst through the door and ask me what I was doing snooping in his office, but even I didn't know what I was doing.

"Lewis.. Lewis.. Come on", I mumbled to myself. I finally found a brown file with Hopes name on it, but Austin's and Lynn's weren't there. I sighed. Just my luck. I turned towards the desk and began looking for anything and everything about Lynn and Austin. Underneath a few papers, I found Lynn and Austin's file. I grabbed them and stuck all three files into the pocket of my big coat.
Shutting the door back, I ran like hell out of there, thankful Matthews wasn't around when I left and that no one stopped me.

********************
Ten hours of driving and still twenty miles to go, until we got there. I was becoming annoyed and restless, as was Copeland and JR, who would occasionally whine in their car seats. I knew they were uncomfortable, so was I. But I also knew it would all be worth it in the end.

"Just hang in there, kiddos. We're almost there."

When we got to the Motel I was so tired, I didn't even want to carry the bags inside. But I knew I would regret leaving them behind in the morning, so I put my backpack on, I put Copeland's diaper bag around my neck, then JR's diaper bag went around my neck. Next I grabbed Copeland's car seat, then JR's and rushed inside.

"Kellin Quinn", I told the clerk in the lobby.

" Oh, you're Mr. Quinn. My daughter adores your band"

I smiled, "Thank you. So what room am I in?"
I tried not to be rude but two newborns with two car seats and three heavy bags were starting to get to me.

"Oh right. Room 206"
He handed me the key and I made my way to room 206, thankful I made it safely. I laid Copeland and JR in the bed and fixed them both a bottle. I changed them into their pajamas, fed them, burped them, and sang two lullabies to them,then they were out. I felt like sleeping too, but I knew I wouldn't be able to.

So I put the bags down on a chair in the corner. I put the formula in the kitchen and then I got out the files and placed them on the small table. As soon as I sat down, JR started to whine. I got up and comforted him.

"Shh it's okay."
My phone began to vibrate, I unlocked it and looked at a picture of Hope with JR and Copeland popped up, it was my background after all. JR seemed to quiet down some. I smiled showing him the picture of Hope, which silented his cries completely.

"Don't worry, buddy, we'll find Mommy. I promise", I told JR honestly because it was true. It was time for Hope to come home and I was going to make sure that happened.