Will you still love me the same way you loved me before? || Lenrisa

maybe i am just not enough?

"Kung sinabihan mo naman ako about it Leni, it wouldn't be this worse. But you chose to hide it from me then look. Ang kalat na. I already told you it is alright na you'd lose feelings for me, but please at least tell me. I don't want you suffering from me Leni, i want you to be free. And also im sorry if nagalit ako sayo kanina, i mean who wouldn't? of course magagalit ako sayo. Leni please sabihan mo ako okay?"

"Yes Risa, im sorry. Im really sorry. I thought it was better for me to hide it kase alam ko na masaktan ka about it..i totally lost it for a few years. It was a few actually. And thankyou, thankyou Risa. I.."

"yea?"

"i...i can't say it."

"why? is it because-"

"i still love you Risa, but i do too much nonsense and i might break our relationship again. I can't do it, i can't stand seeing you crying and crying about me, about us. Pero if you will wonder if mahal paba kita, yes i still love you very much, pero hindi ko alam bakit ko yun nagawa Ris, i didn't have the courage to tell you how much i really do because you might bot believe me. Of course is to see is to believe right? pero ano yung nakita mo, yes. Cheating..me being a redflag..ect."

"Me too Leni, why don't we?"

"We still have to think about it Ris, i'll let you know soon as possible whenever..is the right time."

"Yeah..cge Leni, me too, we have too. I have to think about it and also you. I guess thats all? i don't have much to say right now, im still processing. See you tomorrow? or...hindi na?"

"Tomorrow Ris, grabe naman yung hindi na. Look im really sorry ha, i left you 3 years flat. I don't know how to tell you exactly what i really mean..pero im sorry Risa. Im really sorry."

Leni cried.

"Uyy, wag kang umiyak. I understand Leni. Don't waste your tears for such a shit Leni, deserve momg umiyak para sa iba. Wag ako okey? it's better if hindi kana lang umiyak."

I laughed.

"Wala ka talagang respeto Risa. May umiiyak dito pero andyan ka tumatawa hays, anyways, no. You deserve my tears Ris."

"And why is that?"

"Because you are the one, ikaw ung andyan at my worst. You were the person who helped me get over everything, you were the one who made me feel i was enough, i was pretty in my own way. Ikaw lahat Ris, i couldn't thankyou enough."

"You're welcome Leni, you also. Im really thankful to have you, and..i..."

"Hmm?"

"I love you more Leni."

"enebe, marami pa akong kasalanan Ris. Marami pa, na pagsisihan ko. No matter what, i promise you, i'll stay. Even if mawala ako after 15 years babalik, at babalik ako sayo."

"Well..i guess that's enough for today? it's turning pretty dark. By the way saan ka? i mean saan ka naka tira? why did you went here also?"

"I rented a hotel room, yeah ako lang mag-isa. I went here to witness the sunset and the sunrise. I know it sounds pretty weird but i love both. Sunsets or sunrises."

"Oh wow, same here! sabi din ni Pia na maganda daw talaga ung view dito especially sa sunset and sunrise."

"To be honest. I remembered you when we arrived here, i went outside on my own and remembered you. Also your promises, i was losing hope and i thought you were never coming back Leni. I was crying for dear life, wala na akong magawa of course. No connection together, wala lahat."

"Ye..about that im still so freaking sorry Risa. Hindi ko alam kung pano ko sasabihin sayo about it."

"Well, let's don't think about it anymore."

"Pero im really sorry Ris, ah..mahal kita."

"I do too."

Leni smiled and waved goodbye, i did the same thing and got inside the house. And i see na nag-order lang pala sila ng food. I ate, it took some time for me to chew the food properly. Ewan, and took a half bath, still thinking of what had happened earlier kase parang hindi totoo e. I can't imagine, parang nasa wattpad story ba yun? like she pops up out of nowhere. And i don't know. Wala na akong ibang ginawa kung hindi mag cellphone and lying down the bed. The bed was too big for me kase ako lang isa. Pia doesn't want to sleep with me so of course ako nalang mag-isa. Boring ung night ko. Walang kausap, wala. Wala si Leni. I miss her, even if redflag sya, mamahalin ko pa din sya ng todo. I don't fucking care if red na redflag sya pero hihingi sya ng tawad that's all i want. Sorry, simple word. "Sorry" sorry means alot to me, even if may nagawa ka that's alright basta mag sorry ka saakin. I accept it with my heart open, especially for Leni. I know she's a huge REDFLAG pero i can't, i can't stand it when she's begging for me to say it's okay. I mean okay naman ako pero it'll took some time. I can't freaking say "it's alright" to someone unless it's Leni, i really love Leni. Si Leni nalang lahat, i know. Pero i don't even know if ako padin ba haha. Maybe she was just saying sorry para patawarin ko lang sya tas okay nanaman. Nah, she's Leni. She isn't that kind of person. I know Leni from the bottom of my heart, i was with her for a dozen. Pero not when that day happened. I don't want to think about it lol.
I was so bored, so wala na akong ibang choice hahahaha. Natulog nalang ako tutal, it was already 1:15am. I didn't know bakit. The time was so fast like i don't know. Matulog nalang tayo kase may problema nanaman na haharapin tomorrow haha.

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I apologise forda late update, ksi busy sa school maraming sched💀

pero it's oke. May time naman ako😂 ewan ko lang bakit ako tamad na tamad especially updating my wattpad stories HAHAHHAHAHA wala pa akong nagawa na mga assignments☺️

iiyak na ako hindi ako marunong🫡🥹