Beside You, With Him

Week 5 - Chess Talks

When we got back I let Iben shower

And then I did.

We played chess afterwards.

As we played chess we talked and laughed.

That was nice.

I'm starting to smile as I'm writing this.

I asked you,

"Why do you stay?

With me..."

He went quiet.

"I enjoy your personality,

And honestly your great company!"

He laughed.

"I wish I believed that."

He seemed to frown, but there were signs of him thinking in his face too.

"You should! Why else would I be here?"

"Your mother wanting you to marry,

I'm close,

you're bored.

I'm good for rep if you save me."

He seemed sad at that, almost even hurt.

He opened his mouth to speak but stopped.

He took his turn and then sighed and spoke.

"I'm not like that.

I'm here because I like you.

You wake me up,

when I'm down in my dreams of better times."

My eyes went wide against my control,

I had never known of his suffering.

"What's happened in your past...

You've never really told me."

"Nothing major.

I just had a dad who hated my very soul

and a careless mother."

"Oh... I'm sorry I can't really relate."

"You have her..."

"That's different."

I looked down at my lap

"You have all your friends still with you."
"I guess, but my family is a junkyard

of broken relationships.

Plus, you have me. You didn't lose everyone."

"I guess, but I lost my world.

And I don't know how to rebuild it."

He paused.

At this point we stopped playing the game.

"Can I help?"

Those words...

He was definitely different,

then most "nice" ones I'd encountered.

I stayed quiet as I got up and walked away.

My heart was pounding

What do I say to that?!

The moment reeks of anxiety

and uncomfortable silence.

I turn to face him

a solemn look on my face

"You can try,

and you might be the first to succeed."

I trust Iben, I really do

But no one has ever helped me more

then just lifting my spirits momentarily.

"Then I'll try."

He said that so firmly and determinedly.

My face flattened.

"Try all you want."

I looked away as I got up

I tried to walk away

But he caught by arm and pulled me back

"I will help you."

He said his face was more sure than I'd ever seen.

I attempted to smile at him,

probably looked like a smirk though.

Then here in this boring ol' room,

We stood staring into each others eyes.

Longing for happiness in mine,

determination and fear in his.

This moment,

I will never forget it.

Not for anything.