The Sword Maiden

Debrief

The time with Axe cleared my mind, at least to the degree that I could calmly go over and assess all that had happened that day, to determine what I did wrong and what I did right.  

For the most part, I had done alright until the moment when I'd chosen to follow Daxton's orders and leave him alone in the courthouse with Megidil.  No matter how good Daxton was, there was no way he was good enough to take on five bandits, and I'd left him in a dangerous situation.  I should have deferred to what I knew Redwar would have wanted, which was to stay with Daxton.  Or, I could have at least waited until the miners were close to the courthouse before going out to warn them.

My second mistake was not going straight back to Daxton after delivering the message to Valeria.  My third, fourth, and fifth ones were during the fight against the attempted kidnapping of women and children. 

I'd barreled into the fight with no thought as to what I was going to do.  I was ill prepared, and ended up throwing myself off balance because I chose to slam into the thug.  I should've known better than that and attempted a different tactic. 

Then, I hadn't kept my attention on my surroundings.  Mr. Lotcin had appeared at my side before I'd known he was there, and taken out my opponent.  While I was happy for his assistance, if he hadn't been a friend but rather a foe, I could have been defeated all to easily.  

Finally, I'd let my attention be drawn to my brother and Daxton's fight with Megidil, which could have resulted in the escape of the thug if Mr. Lotcin's fist hadn't done such a number to him.  Again, I'd lost my attention, and that was dangerous.  I counted myself blessed that it hadn't led to some humiliating or devastating loss. 

All this and more I analyzed before Valeria came to tell me that Redwar wanted us in the dining room of the tavern for the debrief.  I was glad to have a chance to prepare myself beforehand, and was interested to hear of what Redwar would have to say about our performance. 

Derrek and Daxton were already there, sitting in chairs by a table in the corner with Redwar.  Daxton had his usual disdainful and stoic look on his face.  Derrek was still wearing that stone mask.  

I tried to lock eyes with him, and ask him silently what was going on.  But he ignored me, averting his eyes or keeping them half closed.  I wanted to drag him off and start employing all my sisterly interrogation tactics on him, but of course I couldn't.

Instead, I pulled out a chair that was next to Daxton and facing Redwar.  Valeria sat down on my other side.  

When I looked up at Redwar, I expected to see a solemn and serious look on his face.  But to my surprise, he still had that grave seriousness, as he always did, but there was a half smile as well.

There was a long, tense moment of silence after Valeria and I sat down.   

Then Redwar chuckled, which broke it.  "What, do you think I'm going to grill you over the fire of my wrath?"

It was his way of teasing, and I let out a breath, then smiled. 

He shook his head and leaned forward.  "No.  I am proud of you.  You did well for your second test of your training.  But of course, no matter how well you did, there are things that we can learn from, and  that is what we're here for.  To learn from both the good and the bad." 

Some of my guardedness, which I hadn't even known I had, disappeared.

Redwar looked toward Valeria. "You want to go first?"

She nodded. After swallowing and straightening slightly, she methodically laid out a report that she clearly had outlined in her mind. It was concise and to the point.

"Overall, I'm pleased with most of my choices and actions," she concluded. "But of course, like I said, there are some things I want to work on."

Redwar nodded. "I agree. Well done, Valeria."

Those words meant a lot coming from Redwar. You knew he meant it if he said them. A pleased glow lit Valeria's eyes as she nodded in thanks.

Then Redwar turned his grey eyes on me. "How about you, Ravine?"

I rolled my lips and took a deep breath before plunging in. My report was longer than Valeria's, in part because there was more that I had done than she had. I also mentioned more of my own mistakes. There was no point in not being honest about it.

"So, I did a lot of things right. But I also made some critical mistakes that I should not have; my biggest one was leaving Daxton alone, which disobeyed your orders and put him in danger. I'm sorry, Redwar." I finished up and let my gaze fall to the table in front of me as I uttered my apology. Then I remembered someone else I had failed and glanced over to Daxton. "I'm sorry to you as well, Daxton."

Daxton's eyes flashed with annoyance, but I didn't care. I had to say it, no matter what he thought of it. I'd failed him by allowing him to persuade me into doing that.

"I can see you've tortured yourself enough over that without me adding to it. Thought you are right that you didn't do your best, you still did well, Ravine, and your humility will serve you well if you keep it. One of the greatest mistakes for anyone, no matter how well they do, is to let pride blind them."

My breath was let out in a long silent sigh of relief. "I'll try to remember that." I looked up to see whether Redwar would pick Daxton or Derrek to go next.

He had pinioned Daxton with his gaze. "You're up, Daxton."

Unlike Valeria and I, who had been studious about our reports, Daxton projected an air of indifferent nonchalence. Which was not unlike him when it came to serious things, but I was coming more and more to know just how much of a mask that could be.

He did not list anything that he'd done wrong, whether it was persuading me to leave him or his determination to kill Megidil. His words rolled off his tongue with apparent ease, though I knew he had planned every word he spoke. His report was by far the shortest and he didn't offer a summary of what he thought of his actions. Redwar never took his eyes off him.

When he finished, Redwar leaned forward. "So, you don't think you did anything wrong? There was nothing you could have done differently?"

Daxton shrugged. "Well, of course, there were a few things I probably could've changed, but other than those tiny details, no."

I glanced over at Valeria, our gazes meeting and communicating the same thought: What is this boy thinking? He was treading a dangerous line.

"I don't call putting yourself in a dangerous situation a 'tiny detail'."

Again, Daxton shrugged. "I don't think I was. I could take care of myself; I didn't need her for anything."

"I assigned you and her to do your part of this together. Whether you believed you needed her help or not, you were to stick together. Furthermore, you not only jeapordized yourself but also her safety as well."

"I didn't need her help nor her protection. She is not my nursemaid and I'm not her's," Daxton shot back.

"You may not need her help, and she does not need yours, but a need for help is not the only reason to accept someone's help, Daxton. Nor does it excuse your own actions." Redwar sat back. "While you remain with us, you must work with whoever I assign you with. I know you're used to being a loner, but I'm hoping you'll find being part of a team isn't a burden but rather, an empowerment."

Daxton didn't respond, just flexed his lower jaw slightly and, to my surprise, gave a begrudging nod.

AN:  I had to rewrite this half chapter a second time because wattpad deleted the previous part, otherwise your update would have come sooner.  But it is here now, and hopefully updates will be more forthcoming!