I Was Always There

11

Thank you to everyone who is still following this story. With work and applications for graduate school, I have been insanely busy. I decided I might write the chapters and put them out there but once I have time, I go back and edit. 

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The Star and moon competition was about to start. I still had thirty minutes to prepare and I was internally freaking out. I kept staring at the mirror trying to give myself a pep talk. I breathed in and out but it seemed to only work for a second until I started freaking out again. 

  I then saw Pha stand right behind me with a small smirk. "Nervous?" he asked. 

I nodded and felt my stomach drop. He then grabs a chair and sits down next to me. 

He just stares at me and then finally says "I know". 

"You know what?" I asked quizzically. 

" I know that confusing feeling" he sighed. "I know the feeling of not knowing what's about to happen but knowing everything is about to be different once it happens. It makes you want to scream but also know you did everything you could do in the end". 

  I stared at him wide-eyed. After a few seconds of silence, I managed to stutter out "I don't know what you're talking about". 

He smirked and said "sure you don't". 

  He got up and stretched and then said "What do I know? You're obviously only nervous because of the contest". 

  Someone called his name so he quickly said wished me luck before giving me one last knowing look.  I turned back to the mirror and stared at it intensely. Remembering Pha's words I slapped my cheeks and told myself "everything will be okay" before seeing Ming come towards me. 

  He smiles and tells me we have to start getting into position because the show starts in five minutes. I nodded and got up. While getting into like I for some reason didn't feel the butterflies in my stomach anymore or felt the nerves tensing me up. They started calling the contestants and I can confidently say for the first time all day I had a clear head.