School was always stressful, it was stressful on Hannah, it was stressful on Alex, it was stressful on everyone. Hannah had assignments coming in almost every week, and the only thing keeping her sane was Alex, talking to him was calming her down, but part of her still felt that maybe he didn't think of it that way, maybe she wasn't calming him down too, that maybe what she was feeling was one sided, and she hated that, and she felt jealous at the thought of someone else making him feel the way he makes her feel, she hated it so much.
Because of their late replies to one another while texting, it was hard to talk during school, and even out of school, Hannah felt like they were getting a bit distant. The late replies never really bothered her up until now, she would constantly wonder whether or not the reason he wasn't replying was because he was talking to other girls, or hanging out with them. After all, she was only someone he met online.
Because of her crush on Alex, she never paid attention to any other guy. Obviously if one came up and talked to her she would be polite and talk to them, but she was never interested. Everyone at her school wasn't very attractive and she had her eyes on only Alex, and she had no intention of getting to know another guy, even if her and Alex wouldn't date, she still liked him and she still wanted to be with him, so why would she try to stop that? Especially when Alex was such a sweet guy.
"When's your concert?" One of Hannah's friends, Lilly asked, while the two of them were sitting in the cafeteria,
"I think it's December 14?" Hannah replied, but she wasn't sure. Band was an elective so she hasn't been paying that much attention to it, even though she loved the class, she had more important classes to focus on. She told Alex about her concert, sent him the music she was going to play, he was happy that she was excited, and she loved that he was happy, it made her feel good, she liked that. But the two of them weren't talking as much, to Hannah, it seemed like he wasn't interested in her and was trying to distance himself a little bit, his replies were really late and dry, so she figured he didn't want her, it seemed that way to her.
It got to the point to where the two of them weren't calling that much, Hannah was sad, really sad, even cried a few times, when she would ask to call he would be busy, and she understood that, but it still hurt. It was a stupid thing to get hurt over, talking to her wasn't his whole life, he didn't focus on just her, and she was upset because of that. She liked him and she wanted herself to be what his world revolved around. It was selfish.
Since the two of them weren't talking as much, Hannah was mostly alone, sure she had friends but they weren't usually with her. Alex was really the only real friend she had.
Days and weeks passed and the two of them started talking less and less, Hannah's band concert was in a day or two, and she was focused on that. She wanted to have one of her friends stay after school with her, she didn't want to spend 2 hours in the school by herself, but none of them were available. Besides one of her brothers friends, Braylon. Her and Braylon have talked before over text, not really in person. They mainly talked because he'd want her to pull some stupid prank on her brother, but the two of them talked enough to the point where she figured she'd have him stay so she wasn't by herself, so she asked and he agreed.
Braylon wasn't that attractive to her, she had a type and he didn't fit it, she didn't like his personality as much, so she really didn't have much interest in him. She still liked Alex, even though the two of them were barely talking, deep down she still liked him, he was the person that was on her mind at night before bed, in the shower, in the mornings before school, she wasn't over him.
But Braylon talked to her more, and thats when things started going downhill for her.
He wasn't rude or anything, he talked about how he was raised right and how he was raised to treat women right, but then he texted her something that caught her completely off guard,
Braylon: I need to tell you something
What is it?
Braylon: fuck I shouldn't be telling you this, I don't even tell my guy friends this
Just tell me I won't judge
Braylon: No I can't you're going to think it's too weird
I swear I won't just tell me what it is lol
Braylon: I want to watch yk porn rn
Hannah stared at her phone in shock, she wasn't expecting that, part of her was uncomfortable that he said that, she didn't like it when the first thing guys talk to her about is something sexual, and this was the first actual ongoing conversation her and Braylon had.
But she was scared if she said something too rude or something that got him upset he would tell her brother they were talking, and her brother didn't want her talking to his friends, he didn't like it. So she didn't say anything, she just told him it was normal and nothing to be ashamed of, and ever since then he would text her everyday,
He would constantly tell her how amazing she was, and in all honesty she was really fucking uncomfortable by it, she didn't find him cute, it was weird to her. She didn't see him in that way, but she was still nice, which was a mistake.
He would text her about how he wanted her to suck him off, and do other things, she was pretty weirded out by it, but by this point she was a little attached. Not because she liked him, but because he was everywhere. He would text her a lot, she'd see him around school a lot, its like she couldn't get away from him, so it got to the point where if he didn't text, she would get upset. She didn't have any real feelings for him, looking back at it she realized she didn't, it was more of him being anywhere and everywhere that got her confused, this was nothing like how she felt with Alex, it wasn't real.
Things got worse when he texted her about how he wanted her to give him head, she thought it was a joke and joked back, she did that with everyone. Even girls. But when he asked to meet up with her, then proceeded to ask if she was going to get on her knees for it, she realized he wasn't joking. And that he was serious. He seemed so serious about it to the point where if Hannah didn't do it, she knew he would leave and be uninterested. She was so surprised by it and didn't want to, she wanted to do that with someone she was dating, they weren't dating, he didn't want a relationship because of his "commitment issues",
But she did it anyways. It was horrible, and she felt horrible. The only thing she wanted to do was leave, she felt so gross and dirty. Hannah couldn't do it anymore and ended up blue balling him, he told her it was fine, but she could tell he was really upset by it, which got her even more disgusted. Every day she would spend with him after that felt wrong, really wrong and she didn't like it, but when he told her he loved her, she didn't say it back, not at first, because she didn't. But he kept saying it, over and over again, he was love bombing her, and when she said it back, when she returned the same energy back, he left. Leaving her alone, she had no one. No one she really cared about, because Alex was gone, they weren't talking, and the only thing that she could think about when her and Braylon were together was him.
