Return Of The Last Dragon

Return Of The Last Dragon: Sundown Gaiden-Phoebe

A few weeks back!

A lady named Phillis St. James enters her modest, but yet fancy home in North Hollywood, California.  Her neighbors beckon to her...  Miss!,.....Miss!  Phillis looks over at the two men.  Ma'am, you don't look like Billy!  Are you by chance his wife!?..  If not, we're having a party out back later want to join us? Phillis just stares at them.  We got that action if you know what I mean?... She still just stares at them.  SERIOUSLY WHO ARE YOU!?, shouts the other guy.  Cut it out Bob!  No!,..People squat all the time out here because they know the owners are always gone, and we've never seen her around here before!  Billy isn't the marrying kind, and she ain't even blonde, so we know she's not his type!  WHO DA F*CK ARE YOU!?  Phillis chirps her expensive Mercedes and ignores them as she enters the home.  I'm calling the cops!,..shouts the one named Bob.  Phillis shrugs, then goes into her home, and turns on the huge television, after pouring a huge glass of expensive whine.  "NEWSFLASH!....THE TERRORISTS DRAGON GREENS CONTINUE TO TERRORIZE NEW YORK CITY..DESTROYING BUILDINGS!...".. CLICK! Phills turns to local news.  "Dame Boni Bustamonte or Love has been in a court battle over the estate of renown rapper, actor, and mogul Shawn Johnson also known as Sho-Tee Bumpstock!  The former oligarch of Spain, Boni has made claims that she is the common-law wife of the mogul, and also the mother of his child!"  Motherf*cker!,..she was pregnant when she fought us!???,..says Phillis thinking out loud. "So far all the cards seem to be falling for the Dame formerly of Spain, as it looks as if she will be found to be at least partly awarded some if not all of the assets of the presumed dead Rapper slash Mogul!...back to you in the studio Ted!"  Click!,.. Phillis turns off the television.  !DING-DONG!......!DING-DONG!.....  Phillis goes to answer the door.  It's the police, with her two neighbors in the background looking on.  Sorry ma'am, but we have a report of a squatter in the neighborhood.... Can you prove this is your domicile, or that you are supposed to be here!?  No problem Officers....I'm actually house sitting for a friend...  Here is my driver's license, and the house sitters agreement per my friend the owner of this house Mr. Robert Newman.  ...Hmmmmm  Phoebe Harris.....Everything checks out!  Sorry to bother you ma'am.  You have a nice evening Ms. Harris!  ...And you do the same officers,...replies Phoebe as she looks angrily at the two enterlopers behind the cops...   Shoom!..  Phoebe sends a shot of what looks like silly-puddy rocketing over to the two guy's back yard.  BOOOOM!,...  AN EXPLOSION!?,..says one the policeman.  It came from over there!   LET'S GO!  The two cops race over to the two guy's back yard as Phoebe closes the door behind.  I'm running out of time!,..thinks Phoebe to herself as she hears the police carting off her two nosey neighbors.  It's his drugs!,..  No, it's his!  Officer my sister is dating the brother of the guy who does Whoopie Goldberg's hair for The View...I can't get booked!,...This won't look good for Ms. Goldberg if I get a rap sheet!  Getcho' ass in the car!!,..shouts the cop.  Simpletons!,..snarls Phoebe.  Sigh!,....Let's do this!

A few hours later at a very popular restaurant  frequented by the A-listers, a guy slips into the backdoor behind a couple of waiters on a cigarette break.   He dips, and ducks around until he sees a chef overseeing a huge pot of some freshly cooked chicken.  That's messed up Mistress!!  !!GASP!!...the lady recognizes that only a select few would use that moniker.  !!GOT-D*MMIT!,..only a few people would even know to use that name with me!....... Sha-Boogie!....The fact that you're here means we gotta' fight!  WHOA!,...WHOA!,..coming in HOT!...  Who said we have to fight!  If you're here someone obviously sent you, or you're on your own twisted mission of some sort!  If you don't want to die a terrible, and agonizing death...get the f*ck outta' here now!  HOLD ON,..HOLD ON!,...you aren't even going to at least hear me out!?  What's there to hear!  We both know what world we deal in!  I have no time for games man!  Ok... sheesh!....  But still....first off the Orange Chicken Mistress?...really?,...the most popular dish in this establishment!  You do know you would be killing about 20 to 30 innocent people!   She eats it every time she comes...I can't take any chances.  Still the Plague Mistress I see! ....Sorry Phoebes...I can't let you!  Shariq!,..step away from the chicken.  BLAM!,... Shariq knocks over the chicken Phoebe just poisoned, bringing the attention of all the cooks, and Chefs.  !!WHAT DEE ACTUAL F*CK!,...WHO IS SH*TTIN' UP MY KTICHEN!!?  IT WAS THESE TWO CHEF!,.shouts a random cook.  !!WHO DA F*CK ARE YOU GUYS!?  CALL THE POLICE!...KILLER FANATICS...KILLER FANATICS,...EVERYBODY CALL THE POLICE!!...  Shariq and Phoebe high-tail it out of the back door, but once they get two blocks over .....Phoebe punches Shariq hard, sending him rolling in the street.   When he gets up, he can barely breath as goop is coming out of his nose, ears, and eyes.  Shariq, do you have any idea how long it took me to get to this point!?,...All the planning!?,...  Do you even know what's going on out there!?,...What you have done!?  Shariq gurbles, and can barely speak due to the goop.  Now die!,..says Phoebe..   !!KACHEEEEZE!!  Shariq camera flashes Phoebe's eyes enough to break the hold she had on him.  COUGH!,...COUGH!,..WHEEZE!,....UGH DAT'S GROSS!  D*mn Phoebe!,..I mean D*MN!,..Is this really necessary?  Let me just tell you!....  NOT INTERESTED SHARIQ!!,..I held back just to let you know I'm not playing.  You got seconds to get out my face before I finish the job!  Would you please stop playing super-b*tch for just one second,...  Save your breath, I don't need to hear about the deep state funded government agency that sent you!,...And how they need my help!!  No...No!,...I mean Yes,...But......look!...  How much do you know about Operation Bumpstock?  I know that the whole outwest facility fiasco was organized by the US Government.... And as usual things got "out of hand" and now they are looking for some expendable bad-ass to clean up the mess?  What?,..I don't know what you're saying!,..replies Shariq.  In the beginning when Bruce Leroy, and Sho-Nuff got on the radar of the US alphabet agencies, they began to look at the "glow" as a possible weapon they could harness for themselves.  In their experiments they mistakenly opened up a portal to another dimension, releasing something with tremendous power.  You mean Arafel, and that's what I said!,..replies Phoebe.  If you hadn't got in my way, that b*tch would be dead right now, and the problem would've been solved already! That's not the whole extent of the story replies Shariq with a forlorn look.  For the love of god, let me guess they have someone,..who!?.... your parents!?,...brother!?,... sister!?,....no....a lover!  For f*ck's sake Shariq!  Initially she said they started this, and now they want to finish it! Who's she?,..asks Phoebe.  Senator Tandoria.  That spook!,..replies Phoebe.  I knew it!  She was at the facility all the time, and once Arafel popped up... She never showed her face again!  It was the advent of Arafel that changed everything!  They have been trying to get control of the facility ever since he took over!   Well d*mn!......BWAAAAAHAHAHAHA!  What's so funny?,..asks Shariq.  It was her!..... It was her all along!  She played every single last one of us.... the Shogun,...the Greens,...everyone!  Look......she wants access to whatever intel of Arafel's that Boni has from the facility......And I just want my friend back!  PLEASE....help me! Dang Shariq!,..whoever this chick is, she's got your nose all the way open!,....But NO!,..I will not trade one world ender for another!  Boni was all in with all Ararfel's plans!  I know she will try to finish what he started!  ...And she just got the means to do just that!,.....NOPE!...Whatever Boni has dies with her!  You know what kind of woman Tandy is!,... replies Shariq.  She won't stop!  ....Help me, and I'll help you kill em' both if need be and stop this!  Rrrrrrrrgh!,...but if you try anything or if this goes south for any reason, I will murder everything in my path!!  Oh my!....So dark!,.replies Shariq.