Over And Over Again

Chapter 2

Trigger warnings ⚠️ mention of Child abuse, suicide and sexual assualt.

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Loop 50

12:30 p.m

Sunday

Toga and Twice's same messages as before.

And Hawks' message (Good night with a heart followed by a fire emoji.) 

Dabi heaved a sigh as he stared at the phone in his hand for the millionth time as if it would automatically change what was on it. It was the same thing every time he woke up; the same day, the same messages, the same everything. 

In the last loops, he just kept sitting on his bed, doing nothing until a new loop started over again. He shuddered every time he remembers his suicide attempt.

Falling — only falling and feeling nothing

He didn't want to ever have this feeling again. He didn't know that he would ever be afraid of death because he always thought that he would only feel peace after being dead, but he didn't really get the peace that he always dreamt of. He only felt pain and fear and he realized that he didn't want to die, but he also didn't want to be trapped in the time loop.

He let out another sigh as he left his bed and didn't bother with his morning routine which he had done a million times. He didn't bother eating anything as he passed his small kitchen and he headed out of his apartment, his disguise was on because Dabi didn't want to confront anyone at this moment.

People were looking at him due to his disguise, and he knew that he looked suspicious, but he didn't care –  he felt so empty and alone as he walked down the streets, not knowing his destination. God, he was so pathetic.

He didn't know how long he walked, maybe an hour or two, his feet were hurting and he could feel pain radiating through them. But the pain made him snap from his poisonous thoughts and he found himself staring at his old home house  — it never felt like home.

He hated how his feet unconsciously brought him here as if knowing that it was the only place Dabi needed to go to.

He knew that Endeavor was in the house from the previous time loops, but he didn't care as he passed the house garden with his head hanging low and he tried to banish the memories of this garden, but it was to no avail.

"Can I name a star after me, mama?" Fuyumi asked one day while they were sitting in the garden, gazing up at the sky and simply enjoying their time without yelling or fear.

Rei laughed as she handed each one of her kids a cup of hot chocolate. "What star do you want to choose?"

"But, Mama! I want to choose first." 

"No, I asked, then I will choose first." Fuyumi stuck her tongue at Natsuo who pouted when she pointed at one of the stars. "This is Fuyumi!"

"And this Natsuo! It's bigger and more beautiful." 

"They are all the same, Natsu." Fuyumi giggled and her brother glared at her.

"No, mine is better." He said proudly then he looked at Touya. "Touya, choose one."

"Ugh, do I have to?" 

"Yes, Touya-nii!" 

"Hmmm, what do you think, Sho? What star should I choose?" Touya said, looking at his youngest brother who was seated next to their mother.

Shoto looked at his mother hesitantly and she nodded at him. 'Choose for your brother and yourself.' She said in a quiet voice, but a small smile was on her beautiful face.