Glitch in the System

2

No matter how much Steve argued, he was banned from going on any missions until he sorted his head out.

It sounded like a good idea to everyone else - yes, it was definitely a big loss for the team, but it was far better than Steve having another 'episode' and passing out. It had been scary for everyone, Steve was known for his unending endurance and stamina, so for his brain to physically switch off? Even if it had only been for a split second, it was unnerving, to say the least. However, his behaviour since the incident was the thing that really put the nail in Steve's coffin.

'Erratic and irritable'. Those were the words that Bruce had scribbled down on his notepad. His personality had completely switched. The Captain had always been a tough nut to crack, despite him wearing his heart on his sleeve, always finding vices in working out or mission planning, but this was different. Far different. It had even gotten to the point where Steve felt as if he was going insane.

It had been a few days since the incident, and y/n hadn't left his mind once. His dreams had been plagued with her silky voice and warm hands, his nightmares chilling him to the bone with nothing but her cold stare. She was everywhere, yet nowhere near him at the same time. Steve didn't know what he wanted more - to get close and confront her or to get as far away as possible.

What was still so dumbfounding to him was the fact that Bruce didn't believe him. Nobody on the team believed him. Whenever he tried to explain that he knew y/n, the world's beloved actress, they all had the same sympathetic glint in their eyes - like they were listening just to feed it back to Bruce later. He felt like a charity case.

The team had left on a mission that would last several days, leaving Steve alone in the cold expanse that was the compound. Alone with his thoughts, and, no matter how hard he tried to distract himself, there was only one person dancing through his mind. No amount of striking a punching bag could get that bitter glare out of his mind - which was made pretty obvious by the several broken bags on the ground of the gym.

A frustrated sigh escaped his lips as he finally stopped punching, sweat dripping from his forehead. He had been in the gym since the team had left, desperate to fill the silence with something other than the voice ringing through his head. The same voice that caused all the hairs on the back of his neck to stand up. He unravelled the bandages surrounding his knuckles, allowing them to drop to the ground without a thought of picking them up. There was no point. He was alone for the next few days. The only person it would piss off would be himself.

He swiped a hand across his hair, the sweaty strands that once stuck to his forehead now slicked back with the rest of it. Heavy footsteps guided him down the hallways and toward the shower, completely lost in his own head. Lost in the ghost of her hands cupping his own. He could've sworn he heard a pair of heels - identical to the ones in the dressing room dream - clicking down the hall behind him. Steve didn't turn around. He wasn't sure why, maybe it was the exhaustion or the hope that he'd actually be able to get into a physical fight, but whatever it was, he wasn't turning around.

Steve had been counting on the warm water to wash away his stresses, to flush that glare down the drain, and to scrub the ghost of her hands from his skin, but it didn't work. Of course it didn't work. The shower just left him with more questions that were impossible to answer on his own.

The steady drip of the showerhead echoed against the tiled walls as the super soldier dried himself off. He pulled on a pair of sweatpants, grimacing at the way they clung to his legs - a silent yet annoying reminder that he wasn't focusing and hadn't properly dried off. He pulled a plain shirt over his head, desperate to escape the steady drip before it sent him over the edge. Tony had been claiming to fix it for weeks now, but nothing seemed to be happening. Hell, Steve would rather hear Peter rambling for hours than hear that drip one more time.