don't miss me

three

Tori came back and wrapped his arm around me. "After we leave here we're going out for food, you should come." Maggie smiled.

"Thanks but we have plans after."

"It'd be so nice to catch up though!" Maggie smiled and the lights dimmed again. Everyone screamed and Tori leaned over.

"How the fuck do you know Billie Eilish?" He asked.

"It doesn't matter, it's a long story." The show started again and I tried to not think of the past.

Finally, the show ended and Billie came over to us. "You like Paramore?" She asked Tori.

"Yes, it's literally my favorite band."

"Come with me." She said and he followed her looking back at me mouthing 'oh my god' I smiled at him and let it fade as he turned away.

"No matter what happened with you and Billie I still love you so much." Maggie said hugging me. "Are you sure you can't come out to eat with us?" She said and I held my breath. Against better judgment, I agreed to go knowing Tori wouldn't let me live it down if we didn't go.

Once I got in my car I laid my head against the steering wheel. Tori got in and took a deep breath. "Holy fuck." He mumbled. "Holy fuck. What the hell happened in there, it feels like a dream."

"Or a nightmare." I mumbled.

"What?" He asked and I shook my head.

"Nothing, did you have fun?" I asked starting the car as Maggie texted me the address.

"Yes, it was literally the best night of my life. I can't believe I got to see Paramore and Billie Eilish on the same night. Now we're going to dinner with her?"

"Life is crazy," I said turning up the radio and trying to clear my head. "All I am is a man-" Tori laughed and I raised an eyebrow.

"That's ironic."

"What?" I asked.

"The song."

"How?" I asked. He stared at me for a second. "What?" I asked.

"T-the neighborhood."

"Ok, Tori you're making no sense."

"Jesse?"

"Who's Jesse?" I asked.

"Billie's boyfriend."

"What?" I asked turning down the radio.

"This is the neighborhood. And billies boyfriend is the lead singer."

"Are you kidding me?" I snapped.

"That's Jesse... the guy there tonight."

"Unbelievable," I mumbled. I turned off the radio. "That fucking bitch."

"Are you ok?" He asked.

"I'm fine." I didn't speak the rest of the drive. As we pulled up to the restaurant I was ready to beat Billie and Jesse into one person. Tori got out and I grabbed a cigarette. I hadn't smoked in four months, I quickly lit it and after a second I saw Billie approaching the car. She said something to tori and he nodded laughing and followed Maggie, Patrick, and Jesse inside. Billie opened the passenger side door and got in.

"V-"

"I don't want to hear what you have to say. I'm here to make Tori happy and then I never want to see you again."

"What the fuck is your problem?"

"My problem?" I laughed. "What the fuck is my problem?" I shook my head and took a long drag on the cigarette. "After my accident, you fucked off Billie. You said you'd always be there but suddenly Brandon was all that mattered. Oh he's the sweetest guy ever, he drinks and drives and gets high and drives but he's the fucking best. I smoked cigarettes and a joint every now and then when we were... whatever we were and you almost took off my head!"

"I was a fucking kid I'm sorry."

"What's your excuse now? You're really fucking the lead singer of our band." She didn't speak.

"Flawless was literally our song. Whenever it'd come on you couldn't keep your hands off me, do you remember that?" I asked. "Now you're fucking him!"

"Vivan stop!" She yelled. "We were kids! I didn't know what I wanted back then."

"Now you want him."

"I didn't know what I wanted and I thought I liked girls I knew you were gay-"

"So I was just what? A... a fucking experiment?"

"That's not what I mean!" I put the cigarette out in an old cup of coffee.