TOXIC BLOODTYPE | Park Sunghoon

013 | haeun's afterparty

↪H A E U N

Even though I wanted to get wasted tonight, just living without thinking about the consequences of my actions. I knew it was not going to be worth it tonight.

Based on my mentalt state because of my emotions and then combine it with alcohol didn't feel like a good idea at the end of the day.

Jaehwa thought about getting wasted tonight as well just for fun, but Eunji being the responsible one among us didn't think of it. But I'm sure she would if she didn't drive us and had her part time job early in the morning the day after.

"Okay.." Eunji said once we all were inside her car.

"That was a successful party or what do you think?" She added as she looked at me and Jaehwa with a smile.

"You are just satisfied because the boys from the medical department were there" I replied with a chuckle.

"Yes, because of obvious reasons" Eunji said with a pleased smile.

"I agree with Eunji but because some girls from the biology department were there" Jaehwa replied with a soft chuckle.

I shrugged my shoulders and smiled while I listened to the conversation between my two friends. Eunji started the engine while she continued the conversation with Jaehwa. I chose to not participate and instead stared out the window.

I didn't really have any expectations on how this party would end, but I definitely didn't expect it to end like this. Me and Sunghoon making out in the pantry because he chose me in 7 minutes of heaven, then he almost bit my neck with his sharp fangs.

I pushed Sunghoon away to protect myself and that's when he started to explain himself, saying he doesn't want to hurt me even though he knows exactly who am I.

What am I supposed to do with him? I'm trying to understand the type of game Sunghoon is playing with me right now because he is constantly messing with me in so many ways. Why did Sunghoon choose to study martial arts when he surely has a talent in acting.

I'm sure Sunghoon is playing a stupid game with me along with his natural acting skills. It makes me hate myself being I'm being such a fool for following along his stupid game.

"Are you okay?" Jaehwa suddenly asked me.

"Yeah I'm fine, I'm just tired" I answered while I stretched out my arms.

Eunji drove her car for another five minutes until she reached my student apartment. I said goodbye to them before I closed the car door and walked up to my apartment. As soon as I stepped inside and closed the door behind me, I let out a loud sign and stood still in my hallway while staring at nothing. 

After all of these books I have read and movies I have watched, I never expected myself to be trapped in this kind of situation. I know have seen this film before but I don't know if I liked the ending of it.

Choosing between an happy or sad ending of my own movie is like choosing between a rock or a hard place.

But at the end of the day, how am I supposed to choose between an happy or sad ending when I don't even know how I personally feel. Why on earth do I suddenly start to feel things for Sunghoon?

My feelings go against everything my parents and relatives taught me from the day I was born. They taught me to naturally connect monsters into something negative but aren't we supposed to be called monsters as well?

The world just calls monsters like Sunghoon a monster, but never apologizes for making me a monster as well for my behavior and attitude. And I thought Romeo and Juliet was a tragic story with their forbidden love.

"I need to call Hawon" I said to myself.

I started to take off my jacket and shoes and then walked further in my apartment. I layed down in my bed and went straight into my contact list.

I only needed to wait a few seconds until Hawon answered.

"Hi, are you busy?" I asked when Hawon picked up her phone.

"Not at the moment, why? Has something happened?" Hawon asked back worried.

"I guess you can say that.. Do you remember the vampire I mentioned before?" I said.

I paused because my mind started to debate with my heart. Should I really tell her about this? Is it going to be worth it?

"We.. I mean he.. Do you really think monsters is the way we have portrayed them?" I replied.

"What are you talking about Haeun?" Hawon asked confused.

"Is monsters behavior true or is it just something we have made up like a stereotype" I said.

"I'm going to ask you one more time, what are you talking about Haeun? You have killed so many monsters, you have experienced interracions with them but yet you think it's just something we made up?" Hawon replied.

"That's  why I'm confused Hawon! I may have experience with meeting and interacting with monsters but at the same time, the only thing we do during those meetings and interactions is fighting and killing them. Are they really the only ones who should be called monsters when we are behaving in the exact same way" I responded.

"And don't think I'm the only one who's insane at the moment because this goddamn vampire is responsible for this. He is the one who made me feel this way because he started it first. He told me he likes me and doesn't want to hurt me even though he's fully aware of my hunter identity" I added.

"And the worst part of it, I don't even know if he's speaking the truth or being serious with me. He is probably playing a stupid game with me right now to make it easier for him later to drink up all the blood in my body. I'm such a fool for letting him play with me like an easy target which makes me hate myself more and more" I stated.

My feelings started to take over me to a point where I couldn't handle it. I ended the phone call and then threw my phone across the room. I don't even care if the screen will be covered with a crack. My phone continued to ring from across the room, Hawon is definitely trying to reach me but because of my emotional state am I not able to answer.

I didn't lie when I said I hate myself. I hate the way I am, I hate the person I have become, I hate the way I'm acting, I hate my personal identity, I simply hate being me, being Bae Haeun.