016 | anger issues

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S U N G H O O N

My head is still spinning and pictures of Mari lying down on the bathroom floor pops up as soon as I close my eyes. Even though I understand what went wrong, a part of me still doesn't understand what went wrong.

In the middle of me biting Mari's neck, the thought of Haeun hit my mind like it was struck by lightning. This makes me hate myself for thinking about Haeun when I shouldn't, and I made that mistake yesterday. That was the reason why I backed off from Mari because in my head, it was Haeun I had my fangs on.

I don't want to hurt her and that's why I freak out. However.. It's still a part of my nature and my way to survive. How am I supposed to keep myself alive when I feel terrifying just by thinking of it?

It doesn't matter how many kilograms of blood I have removed from a human body, what matters is the personality and character inside of me is slowly disappearing. I have hard stories about couples who were blinded by love and then slowly started to lose themselves without realizing it.

Am I just like those couples? Am I also blinded by love? I like the person I am with Haeun because she brings out a new side of me I have never seen before, but I'm trying to figure out whenever it's a positive or negative side of me.

"I think we should stop our bet" I suddenly said.

I could see from the corner of my eye that Jay looked at me like a question mark while I kept staring into the white wall in front of me.

"Why?" Jay asked out of confusion.

"I just think we should stop, I don't see a point in continuing it" I answered.

"Are you sure there is no other reason?" Jay responded and formed a smirk at the end of the sentence.

"What other reason would it be?" I replied.

"Don't ask me, I'm not the one who changed my behavior and attitude out of nowhere" Jay expressed.

I turned my head to the left to look at Jay but he turned his head to the opposite side as soon as our eyes met. To hear Jay saying my behavior and attitude have changed might be a confirmation that I have been blinded by my love for Haeun.

However, it's still unclear whether I have changed into a better or worse person. The definition of a better or worse person depends on every individual. Jay would say I have changed into a worse person meanwhile Haeun would probably say I have changed into a better person.

But before me and Jay continued to hold this awkward and heavy atmosphere around us, Minwoo and Hyunshik along with the Daesung-dude and his friend arrived. The six of us walked into the meeting room and took place around the table. Hyunshik had a paper roll in his hand which he spread out over the table.

"We don't have much time left for the school festival so we need to multitask. We are going to paint this banner while we discuss serving plans, who's in charge of what and stuff like that" Hyunshik explained.

"Where are Haeun and Jaehwa?" I asked out of curiosity.

"They are trying on their clothes with Juni" Minwoo answered.

I nodded. My eyes naturally looked across me at Daesung and his friend who looked at each other with a proud, satisfied smile. Don't tell me these two idiots have been in charge of choosing clothes.

"Our plan so far is to make sweet crispy fried chicken. Even though we are nine people in total we need to make shifts to make sure everyone gets a break, but we also might have to change some positions sometimes if there's a need for it" Hyunshik explained while we started to paint the banner of the table.

"Minwoo will be stepping in to wait tables if there's a need for it. Can either of you two consider stepping in if the kitchen needs more people?" Hyunshik asked me and Jay.

"I can volunteer" Jay said with a smile.

"Great! Daesung, Hyukjae and I will start preparing our tent on-" Hyunshik said.

"I'm going to kill you!" Juni suddenly screamed as she burst into the room.

My eyes naturally looked over at Juni when she entered the room, but I immediately looked away after seeing what she's wearing. I peaked over at the door, seeing Haeun and Eunji in the exact same revealing outfit as Juni.

"Did you guys seriously order these outfits behind my back? The ones we originally bought got canceled because you two ordered this instead?!" Juni shouted at Daesung and Hyukjae.

"We didn't order them because we wanted to see you in them if that's what you think" Hyukjae replied with a laughter.

"Just look at Jaehwa. Her body is already gorgeous but with that outfit it's ten times better" Daesung said as he looked at Jaehwa with a smirk. Jaehwa on the other hand was looking at Daesung with anger and disgust.

"Should we just make Jaehwa wear it? I can tolerate Haeun wearing it but it would fit her better if she lost a few more kilograms and Juni, I just can't-" Daeung complained until he fell down on the floor.

I had enough with his disrespectful attitude. I walked over to Daesung and pulled away his chair so he fell down the floor. He started to groan in pain a little but I wasn't finished yet, I threw the chair at him and then kicked him in the stomach.

"You seriously have anger issues bro" Hyukjae said.

"And both of you seriously have attitude problems" I replied.

I crossed my arms while I watched Daesung in pain on the floor. Minwoo and Hyunshik tried to help him up while the rest stared at me in shock, especially Haeun.

"You like her, don't you?" Hyukjae asked with a teasing smile.

"Yeah I do" I answered without hesitation.

"Someone with such a visual like you has very low standards. She looks like any other girl in this school, there's nothing special about her" Hyukjae said.

I didn't hesitate to kick him in the stomach, causing him to fall down on the floor and hit his head against the wall. It's unbelievable that someone's brain can be so slow and behind in development, it gives me second hand embarrassment.

I looked at both Hyukjae and Daesung one last time before I left. I would have looked at Haeun too if she wasn't wearing that revealing outfit, I don't want to make her more uncomfortable than she already is. 

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