𝔅𝔞𝔟𝔶, 𝔬𝔫𝔢 𝔪𝔬𝔯𝔢 𝔱𝔦𝔪𝔢 || 𝔨. 𝔥𝔞𝔪𝔪𝔢𝔱𝔱

.09.

Two weeks have passed since the clash with Metallica. James and I have talked on the phone in between and he had also invited me to visit them again but I really didn't feel like it.

Even if it was meant nicely. But I can do without someone who plays with the feelings of others.

What am I actually complaining about? It was clear from the start that there were no real feelings involved. But why did it all feel so real? Why did it feel like he's always been by my side?

It didn't feel repulsive, nor did it feel gross. Even thinking about it afterwards wasn't a problem for me.

It confused me.

I spent a cozy evening on the couch with Nelly. We watched Grease at her request. There was also popcorn. Sweet popcorn of course. She loved this movie as much as she loved her teddy bear. Halfway through the movie she fell asleep in my arms and now I'm sitting here staring at a black screen.

Noah was out with Ashley so I agreed to babysit Nelly. Somehow she was more my child than Noah's. But Noah was the best father anyone could ask for. I have to know what I'm talking about with my family business.

Out of nowhere the phone started ringing. I felt my heart stop beating.

Who is calling at this time?
Okay it was only half past ten in the evening so not too late but still.

I gently laid Nelly on the couch so I wouldn't wake her up or anything. Getting her tired again takes what feels like half a century. I could do without that.

When I got to the phone, I picked up the receiver and put it to my ear.

"Park?", I said surprised and confused.

I rarely got calls. I didn't have many friends and my parents never call me anyway.

"It's Cliff, Cliff Burton. Can I speak to Olivia?", said the man on the other end of the line who turned out to be Cliff.

Cliff called me? How so? And above all why? But there was a more important question. Who did he get my number from? Probably James so the question wasn't that important after all. But still, why is he calling me? He didn't seem happy on getting to know me.

"Olivia is on the line. What's up? Something with James?", I asked him.

James sometimes had tantrums. They were nothing new to me but most people are sensitive to his behavior. Sometimes James can be a real asshole. I know what I'm talking about. When we met he called me a hooker and I gave him a nosebleed.

Not every friendship begins harmlessly.

"No, James is fine. I'm calling about you. Because of that two weeks ago.", he said.

That's when memories came up. The not-so-nice reunion with Kirk or the guy I spread my legs for. The conversation, if you could call it that, sucked. Admittedly, I wasn't exactly friendly either. It's not every day you find out that the guy you hooked up with is in your best friend's band.

"What about it? It didn't go well. I wasn't expecting anything else.", I said to him.

I didn't sound really friendly. I had come close to forgetting, after all. I couldn't care less what Cliff has to say. I could just hang up now and fall asleep on the couch with Nelly. But I didn't. I wanted to know what he has to say. I wanted to know what was so important that he called me.

"Actually, I'm not allowed to tell you that but maybe you can understand why Kirk was so lousy.", he said and now I got curious.

At least now Cliff had my full attention. I loved knowing things without the other knowing about them. I was basically like a walking encyclopedia. I knew things about each of my friends or family that no one else knew. They trusted me with everything. I can use all of these things against them if I want. But all the better.

"I'm curious."

"Up until a few weeks ago, Kirk had a girlfriend whom he loved more than anything. The two had been in a relationship for a few years.", he began to tell.

The heartthrob himself had a girlfriend up until a few weeks ago? Unbelievable. But Cliff doesn't seem the type to lie, so it had to be true. But what did his relationship have to do with me? I mean that doesn't make any sense. I'm a completely different person. Or did I know his girlfriend at the time? I have no idea.

"Kirk was ready to propose to her. But that went wrong. When he wanted to surprise her, he caught her with another guy. Turns out she's been cheating on Kirk for a year. That broke his heart.", he said and something stirred inside me.

I felt compassion well up in me. I could feel myself starting to feel sorry for Kirk. My stupid soft heart started liking him instead of hating him. But maybe that was for the best. Maybe not, but we'll see.

"He's trying to process it. Not a nice way, but better than drugs."

"Please don't tell me he's already on drugs.", I said without paying attention to what I was actually saying.

At that moment I didn't care if he just wanted to have fun. Drugs aren't something you just start recklessly. I have to know. It destroyed my father. I don't know how many times my mother put him in rehab. But it didn't help. He always relapsed. Whether alcohol or other even harder things. It completely destroyed him. I don't know how things are with him now. My parents live across from San Francisco. It takes hours to get to my old home.

"Not yet but I don't know how long it will be before he switches to that option.", his voice sounded worried.

Cliff must be worried about Kirk. But what is that to me? I could just pretend I don't care. But I wasn't like that. Even if I'm not the person who likes to talk to others, I still care about other people's well-being. I don't know Kirk and Cliff as well as James does but James is my friend and I'm helping a friend.

"I'll come by tomorrow. Good night Cliff and thank you for telling me."

"No problem. Good night and see you tomorrow.", he said and that was the end of the conversation.

I put the receiver back on the phone and exhaled deeply. Would he really go that far and turn to drugs? That the boys drink alcohol is nothing new, every rock star does that. But drugs? I don't know and I hope he doesn't.

I went back to the couch and picked up Nelly. I didn't want to let her sleep on the couch so I walked into Noah's room with her in my arms. Gently and carefully I laid her down on his bed and then covered her up.

Tomorrow was Saturday, which meant I didn't have to work. So I was able to show up at the boys house around noon. Even if only Cliff knew about it.