I Always Will

Fix You

Paul sighed as he went over the list of supplies in the back room of the clinic one more time. He didn't need to be there. It was his day off and the clinic was closed. Someone else took care of the animals that had to stay over, but there currently weren't any there. He had woken up that morning with his thoughts and stomach churning, knowing that he didn't want to stay around the house and all the memories there.

Paul needed something to do with his hands and to try and distract himself.

More and more, his thoughts started turning back towards his conversation with Briony the night before. It was the most he had spoken to anyone about Rachel in the last year. And surprisingly, despite the fact that it was uncomfortable, the anger hadn't been there. It had been - dare he admit it - therapeutic. But talking to Briony had always been like that.

However, the longer they sat on the beach and the more Briony spoke about her husband with a faint smile on her face, the more Paul started to open up about Rachel, the more the pain returned. To the point where he knew he needed to leave, otherwise he risked phasing on the beach and giving up the whole damn secret.

Shaking his head, Paul continued on with his work, pushing it out of his mind. It didn't matter. It was too late for him. Whatever ease he felt about the conversation was gone as the familiar pain filled him, along with the anger. Not to mention, there was a lot Briony couldn't know. He needed to keep her at arm's length, both for her safety and his.

Paul stopped again, closing his eyes as he breathed deeply, feeling his wolf coming to the surface again. He needed to stay in control. He was in Forks and couldn't risk phasing here. He couldn't risk it anywhere, otherwise everyone would know what was on his mind.

After a few minutes, he felt his wolf retreat and he had stopped shaking. Swallowing, Paul opened his eyes and left the room, going over the possibilities for how he should spend his day. Maybe he'd go sit on the beach.

"Paul, you here?"

Groaning, Paul walked out to the front room, finding Jared there. It was almost as though he was tracking him.

"What do you want?" he asked, narrowing his eyes at his best friend.

"You left pretty quickly last night. Just wanted to check on you," Jared said, the concern clear in his eyes.

"I'm fine," Paul said harshly, starting towards the front door of the clinic.

"It looked like you and Briony were having fun catching up."

Paul stopped and closed his eyes, taking a few deep breaths. It was a mistake to sit and talk to her. Now Jared and the others would start getting ideas. Or maybe it wasn't such a bad idea. If he at least put up the pretense of talking to Briony, they would finally start leaving him alone.

"It was... okay," he admitted, opening his eyes.

"I think it's good for you," Jared continued. Paul could hear him walking closer.

"I can't... Jared, she doesn't know about us," Paul said, putting up another attempt to block Jared's plans. Whatever they were.

"It's not like she needs to know about that," Jared countered. "I'm sure there's plenty for you two to talk about - reconnect over - without mentioning anything about us."

Paul turned around to face Jared, frowning at him. His best friend was wearing a hopeful expression.

"Right, so you think we'll bond over our dead significant others," he spat, feeling his irritation start to build.

"It's better than you destroying your house every other night," Jared shot back, now frowning as well.

"Have you forgotten? She's not one of us. More than that, it's not like she went out of her way to keep in touch over the years," Paul said. "I don't need to bare my soul to someone. I'm fine."