Two Idiots Walk Into a Bar (Dramione)

Two Idiots Do It

The bar was blessedly empty that Friday night; the barman seemed surprised to see him there for a second time that week, but after the disastrous lunch where he had bickered with Her like they were second years in the Great Hall, Draco needed a drink, and staying at his flat wasn't an option – not with Theo and Potter glaring at him between intense snogging sessions on the sofa.

Yes, Draco was aware he had fucked up – royally. Guilt was eating him inside after hearing Potter say all the things the Weasel used to tell Her; learning her struggles to maintain a healthy weight made his banter sound arsehole-y.

Draco knew he had acted like an idiot and didn't need the reminder.

She would most likely never forgive him for saying those words.

Little do you know, Granger, I only mention the size of your hips and the buttons of your blouse because I'm absolutely hypnotised by your curves.

Would she be flattered or horrified if she knew the truth?

He sat at the counter, raising his usual glass of whisky to his lips and taking a large gulp, letting the burn of alcohol hurt him; according to muggles one pain could dull another; wasn't there a saying?

There should be.

Draco was so absorbed in his own pain that he didn't notice someone sitting beside him.

"Hey, Jake."

Jake? Draco wondered. Who's-?

Then he looked up, seeing his most recent (and only) muggle friend and snog partner.

Yes. Here I'm Jake.

"Hello, Miss Jean." He replied with a small nod.

She ordered her usual drink and let out an audible sigh.

"Bad day too?" he asked quietly.

"Yes. Today is one of those days in which all I wanted was to have someone to hold me and whisper in my ear that I'm enough. Cause I feel anything but."

"I get it." Draco replied, staring at the mirrored wall but not really seeing their reflections. "Just someone that looks at you the moment you enter home and immediately knows you need a hug, some chocolate and a cup of your favourite tea."

She hummed affirmatively and sucked on the straw of her drink.

"I'm thinking of quitting my job." She whispered.

"Because of him?" he was surprised.

"Yes. And no. I have a very demanding job and it is interfering with my personal goals. Seeing him at work every day doesn't help either."

"I get it. Maybe I'll end up doing that as well."

Jean smiled at him: "It's both strange and reassuring that I can speak to you about this."

"I share the same feeling."

Unexpectedly, a slow song began to play and they both turned to the left, seeing a man playing guitar on a small stage in the corner.

"Would you like to dance?" Draco asked her.

"Sure. Why not?"

"Don't let me see your excitement, Miss Jean." He chuckled, revelling in the oddity of her unenthusiastic reply; women usually fell into fits of giggles when Draco Malfoy asked them for a dance.

But he wasn't Draco Malfoy there – he was Jake, and Jake was just a heartbroken nobody.

Draco liked being Jake.