Unbounded Love

Chapter Seven

I breathed deeply through my nose, trying to calm down. I had killed my fair share of people over the years - it was a must when it came to the jobs that I had taken. Nobody had said that seducing the enemy was easy. But it had to be done. Nonetheless, it was one thing to kill a stranger and a completely different thing to watch a man snuff out the life from your uncle for hurting you. Though, I couldn't really say that I was sad. Because I wasn't. I was feeling quite the opposite. I felt like a weight had been lifted off of me. I felt free, like I could breathe easier now. Like Ilaria's death had been avenged in a way. And I had only one man to thank for that.

I could hear the deep rumble of his voice from downstairs as I waited for him to come up. Yes, I was relieved that he had gotten rid of Sergei, but I was confused. Confused as to where this left us. Because the way he had spoken back in the room...it had made me feel things. Things that I wasn't supposed to be feeling. Feelings had no place in our friendship, after all. And that's what this was, right? A friendship and nothing more. So why did it feel like it had been more than that for the past week or so?

My breath caught in my throat as I heard the thud of footsteps come up. Alexei's face came into view a moment later, his beautiful features creased in concentration.

"We need to talk."

Those features creased even further at my words, the furrow between his brows deepening.

"About?"

"About what just happened." I said as calmly as I could even though my heart was racing a mile per minute.

"What about it?"

"You can't just say things like that and pretend it's okay."

"You mean say things like how you're mine?"

"I'm not yours and I never have been." I muttered furiously as he started walking.

I struggled to keep up with him despite my long legs, my strides being no match for his.

"Keep telling yourself that. That kiss said differently all those years ago."

My cheeks heated at the mention of it, one of my many stupid mistakes coming to bite me back in the ass. Apparently, me escaping to America had done nothing to diminish those memories. And yes, call me a coward if you want, but going to a whole other country was the only way 18 year old Sofia could have dealt with at that time. It had only been two years since I'd come back - and that too, for Mikhail.

"I thought you said we weren't supposed to talk about that. You made it clear that you wanted to be nothing more than friends since then. So why the change in behavior all of a sudden?" I asked nonchalantly, though a part of me was curious to know too.

Alexei suddenly stopped walking, making me bump into his muscled back with force. He gripped my arm, pushing me back into the nearest wall.

"What -

"Don't say that word again."

"What do you mean?"

"Fuck being friends. I want to be more than that. I want to be more to you."

My breath caught in my throat at his words. Words that I had longed for him to say for so long. Unfortunately, he was 12 years too late now.

"Fuck you Alexei. You don't get to say shit like that and then go back to pretending that we're nothing. I'm nothing to you."

"You were never nothing to me, milaya." He admitted softly as my eyes welled with tears.

Fuck. He wasn't allowed to say stuff like that. He was the one who was supposed to push me away - it acted as a good wake up call for me.

"But then why?" My voice cracked on the word as I turned my face away from him so he couldn't see the single tears spill down my cheek. "Why did you hide? Why did you push me away?"

"I...I had my demons, Sofia. I couldn't drag you down with me back then."

"And now?" I questioned as I hit his chest. "Now you want to drag me down with you, you bastard?"

Hit.

Hit.

Hit.

My blows were weak at best, but I kept hitting, taking out 12 years worth of frustration on him. Years of sleeping with faceless men and hoping foolishly that I'd get to be the one in his arms someday.

"Sofia. Stop."

I didn't. I kept hitting. Kept pushing him back until he finally held my wrists together and turned me around. My breasts were pressed against the wall, his chest glued to my back as the sound of our breathing filled the otherwise silent air.

"Goddamnit, woman! I'm trying to be better for you. Is that enough of an answer?" His voice was low, but the weight of his words was enough to send a ripple of goosebumps over my body.

I'm trying to be better for you. He was trying to be a better man. For me.

"If we do this," I started slowly, resting my forehead against the cool marble, "you don't get to push me away again."

"I'll try not to."

"That's not enough, Alexei. I need to know that I won't be dealing with your hot and cold behavior. Or worse, that we go back to being just friends." I said the last word venomously as his chest pressed even further into my back, the warmth of his body seeping through our clothes.

Silence was his only answer as I closed my eyes, took one deep breath and pushed away from the wall.

"Let me know when you've made up your mind because I'm done playing your fucking games."

And with that, I left him to think over his words, my head held high as I speed walked towards my room, all the while holding back the onslaught of tears. Fuck him. Fuck him for managing to break me even after so long.

I closed the door shut behind me before I slid down, the darkness welcoming me back like an old friend. And then I cried. I cried just like when I had felt the sting of rejection the first time. When I had boarded the plane to Vegas, hoping that a change of scenery would allow me to forget about him. Forget about the memories we had built over the years. My eyes fell shut as my body loosened, willing myself to get up and go to bed. I stood up, just as three knocks sounded on my door and filling my heart with hope.

"Alexei?"

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