~chris sturniolo imagines~

you're gorgeous.💌

TW-mentions of ED and SH. 

Me, the triplets and Madi decided to film a video in the car. We decided to get Mcdonald's beforehand for dinner. 

I had been getting hate comments on every single post. Even when I had stopped posting, people would comment hate about me on my friends' posts. Worst of all is whenever Chris posted me, there was never a single good comment about me. I had been getting so conscious of it, and I started to think, maybe it is true, maybe I am fat and ugly, maybe I don't deserve fame or money.  I had decided to stop eating, all I drank was water, but eventually stopped and only drank a glass if someone pointed out that I hadn't drank any water. I started using things to even hurt myself. I had a little collection in my bathroom drawer; a razor, metal bits of sharpeners, broken glass, scissors and a little penknife. I always cover up with the clothes I wear so luckily no one knows.

"Hey y/n, what do you want for dinner?" Matt asked me from the front. Chris and Matt were at the front and me, Nick and Madi were at the back. 

"I'm not that hungry, I ate a bit before coming here." I say.

"Are you sure? You should get something, just in case." Matt says and Chris looks at me, concerned. 

"Matt, I told you, I'm fine. " I just started to look at my phone and avoid eye-contact with anyone. 

They all got their food, and I could hear Madi and Nick whispering about me. I just continued to scroll through Tiktok until I got a message from Chris. 

My Love <3

My Love<3: hey love,are you ok? 

I look up and see that Matt and Chris are already looking at me. I look at Chris in the eyes and nod. He nods back and turns back around. 

"Ok, let's get going." Says Chris and turns on the camera.

"What the fuck is up guys" Nick says out of nowhere. 

"Today, we are joined by Madi and y/n, and we are about to do a Q&A!" Matt says. 

"Ok, first question, How long have you guys known Madi and y/n for?" Chris reads from his phone.

"Well, I met y/n at a book fair in kindergarten, and then the next day I told Chris and Nick about her and I dared Nick to go and scare her. He did and we've been friends ever since."

"More than friends, in Chris' case." Nick smirks and Chris punches him. 

"Shut up Nick. Anyway, we met Madi in middle school because y/n and Madi were in the same classes so y/n brought Madi with her at lunch one day, and she joined us since then." 

"Yup, Ok now I have a question, Matt and Chris, have you ever liked the same girl?" Madi asks them. 

"Nah, Matt has bad taste in girls." 

"Shut up, Chris is just a child so he's only had one crush in his whole life, and that's the girl who he's dating." Matt says.

"You say that like it's a bad thing Matt." Chris says and Madi and Nick agree. 

"Ok, now my turn, lemme read this one." Nick says as he scrolls through a bunch of questions.

"'Why is y/n a p-'Nah I can't read that" Nick says. 

"Just read it Nick." I say, shaking his arm. 

"Trust me, you wouldn't want me to."

"Show us Nick, we'll tell you if you should or not." Matt says, as he and Chris turn their heads around. Nick shows them and their eyes go wide. 

"I think you should just show her, she would rather find out from you lot than from reading the comments herself, that would make it worse." Madi says to Nick. He shows me his phone and I read it out loud;

"Why is y/n a part of your group? She's a fat, ugly bitch who thinks she's worth something. Drop her. " I look down at the floor and Nick puts his arm around me. 

"It's not true, you're amazing."

"I'm gonna just go outside for a bit, you guys can keep filming if you want." I say, holding back tears.

I heard them try to stop me but I had already gotten out of the car and started walking to the bus stop. I just sat there, suffering. I was going to hold my tears until I got home. 

When a bus finally came, I got on. It was only a 10 minute drive to me and the triplets' shared house but it felt like a century. I finally get off and run to my room. I cry and cry and cry. I go to the bathroom and get out my razor. I take off my jumper, leaving on my tank top for now, and start to go down my arms. One line. Two lines. Three lines. I watch the blood trail down my hand and then I hear the door open. 

"y/n? Are you in here?" It's Chris. 

I don't answer and just fall onto my knees, crying. I think he heard me because I heard him knock on the bathroom door, and he opened it. 

"y/n...what the fuck happened to you..." He goes to get bandages and sits down beside me. I ignore him as he takes my arm from my face and wraps it in bandages. I look up and see his eyes are watering as well. He pulls me in and I start crying into his chest. 

"It's gonna be ok my love...It's all ok. Just know that I'm here, I always will be. " We stay there for a long time while I cry, until I stop, and slowly stand up, my balance wobbling. I just realised how much my head was hurting from lack of food and drink. He stands up with me and guides me to his bedroom. He helps me change out of my jeans and into a pair of my shorts and one of his hoodies. He then guides me to his bed and we both get into it. He pulls me in to a cuddle and starts whispering comforting things into my ear. Then, he asks me a question,

"I know you haven't been eating for ages, you're getting weak. What's wrong? Did someone do or say something?" 

"The hate." That's all I manage to say because of how dry my throat is from crying. Chris realises this and then looks down at me. 

"Don't listen to the hate. These people are just assholes who troll people on the internet for attention. None of it's true, they don't even know you. You're a gorgeous, kind-hearted person. Don't let those people ruin you y/n."

"Promise me, from tomorrow, you will eat something. Even if it is as small as one cookie. I'll feed you it, if you want. We're going to get you out of this mess. Promise me you won't hurt yourself either. You're my world y/n, I can't lose you." He looks me in my eyes and puts his pinky out. I latch mine onto his and he kisses it. I close my eyes and he strokes my hair, helping me fall asleep. I felt him kiss my forehead and say,

"you're gorgeous."