How to Create Your Perfect Girlfriend (On The Karma of Love by Michael Roach)

Chapter 4: Say Goodbye to Back Luck

Have you ever wondered why your girlfriend is unkind to you?

Maybe she ignores you, domineers you, or disagrees with everything.

By now, you should know that everything comes from you. What your girlfriend does to you is what you have done to people in the past. The karmic seed remains even after you have forgotten your actions.

If you want to change her, you must first change yourself.

So, how should you deal with it when bad things happen to you?

The Golden Rule

Firstly, it is very critical to control your reactions to bad events.

It is "natural" for you to hate those who are malicious towards you.

But when you hate, even if you never say it aloud or take any action, it plants negative karma for yourself. If you hate, you will surely get more hatred towards yourself in the future.

Moreover, do you recall where this malice towards you originates?

It comes from you! You were malicious to others a long time ago!

It is why Jesus said, "Do unto others as you would like them to do to you." Thus you must always keep the karmic law in mind and be mindful of any consequence of what you think, say or do.

So what should you do? First, you must forgive the offender.

I know what you are thinking. Forgiving someone is so difficult!

It is why I have created a special meditation for this purpose. In Chapter 6, you will find the exact procedure to forgive your enemy by sending love to her, no matter what she has done.

Next, let us learn how to correct your bad karma from the past.

The Four Powers to Reduce Bad Karma

Here are the four things you must do to diminish your negative karma:

1. Realize that all bad things come from you. Everything comes from you. If some people hurt you, it is because you have done it to others before. Therefore, do not get angry.

2. Resolve to stop this negative karma before it grows bigger and gets out of control. Remember that there is perfect justice, and your karma always comes back with interest.

3. Promise you never make the same mistake again. If you cannot eradicate it for the rest of your life, then add a time limit like, "I will not be rude to anyone again in three weeks."

4. Do something to make up for what you have done. For example, if you have been rude to your coworkers, you can apologize and be kind and patient with them from now on.

If you have done it correctly, you should feel these two signs:

1. You will feel a great sense of relief. It is like you have released a mental burden you have been carrying for a long time.

2. You will encounter slight discomfort or misfortune, like a mild headache or a little loss of money. You may see it as a discount price to pay for what you have done.

In Buddhism, there is a saying, "Your problems are your path."

Learn to love your problems. They show you what's wrong with you.

In other words, when you see a problem, you know it comes from your past karma. If you find out the cause and fix it, it will never appear again in your life, and get rid of it once and for all.

Let us look at a concrete example from someone's relationship.

A Case of Oral Sex

This story comes from The Karma of Love by Geshe Michael Roach.