Afterglow ❃ l.m.j

• chapter forty five •

I looked down upon the club from the balcony with a steely gaze. That familiar head of blonde hair was on her way out, bags tucked under her arms and a scowl on her face. Maybe this time she was out for good. And it serves her goddamn right. Who the fuck does she think she is, putting my business out there? She can't even assume right.

It was hard for me to let it go and plaster a smile onto my face but I knew I had a job to do. So after a brief pep talk in the bathroom and a few tears, I put my best foot forward and got back onto the floor.

I looked towards the bar, locking eyes with Normani. She seen the same thing as me. I could see her nod her head at me in solidarity. I nodded back.

I was seconds away from gesturing  something to her when I felt a hand on my arm. I turned to the touch. A woman slightly smaller than me looked up, her smile shy.

"Hi, I'm sorry. Do you think I could get a dance?"

Her demeanor was sweet. When she sat back down, I walked around her chair, leaning down to spread my arms down her chest. The music in the club was something slow and R&B like, which was perfect. Leave it to Mick to always know what he's doing.

I brought my hands back up to rub over her shoulders and down her arms. She turned to look at my touch, hopeful and curious. I smiled.

When I climbed into her lap and placed her hands on my waist, they began to roam. I popped my ass once or twice to the beat and settled on her.

I was busy trying to work a subtle routine onto her in my head when she spoke. Her voice was soft.

"I admire you, you know." I looked down, giving her a look of wanting to know more. She continued. "Your name's been circulating. It's nice to see you living in your truth. I don't understand it much but I know that not a lot of people have the guts to do that. I can only imagine how scary that was. Especially on New Years Eve of all times."

That familiar feeling of wanting to cry came back but I pushed it back down. I did my best to portray a cool exterior as I replayed her words in my head. My hips were still grinding on her to the music. I leaned down to whisper my reply in her ear.

"Thank you. You're right, it was scary. But I think I feel better with everyone knowing. I don't feel such a chip on my shoulder nowadays."

She nodded, her hands growing tighter at the feel of me sinking lower into her lap.

"You shouldn't have to. You're human like everyone else, just different parts. Still beautiful too. I feel honored to get to have a dance by you."

I pulled back, jutting my bottom lip out. I leaned forward to place a small kiss on her cheek.

"That is very sweet, thank you. I really appreciate that."

When the dance was over, she smiled and thanked me again, nestling two hundred dollars in my garter. I could almost sob, not from the money but from the sense of humanity. All that was riding on my new identity in the club was a lot to take in. I was becoming a lot less like Peaches and more like Lauren. And until this week, I wasn't sure whether that was a good thing.

The rest of the night flew by, and I'd still barely said a word to Ally. I had no plans to aside from plopping the club's share on her desk. Before I left her office, she gave me a date and time for that conversation we were speculating. And even then, I still didn't respond. She knew me enough to know I'd show up. I knew her enough to know that she knew she fucked up. There was nothing more to be said after that.