I thought that, if I would help them, I could prove myself I am worth it. I thought that, if I would be with them I would see myself as a better person. I thought that, I could change my bad habits. They were one of the bad habits of mine. The loneliness I couldn't deal with. They were horrible to me and to everyone but I still continued until I couldn't take it anymore. I will not allow them to take my life. I will not allow them to take my ability and power.
But all I was, was a person so lonely and so honest. They try to take my power as theirs.. But I know they couldn't take that away.
A conversation, when I truly got pissed and made Melanie cry. Can you blame me when I was in the same shit talk circle?
"Jesus, he looks so fucking horrible! Nobody could date that thing." another girl says in the group, that we will call Molly.
"Yeah.. Ew.. " Melanie says. I couldn't take it anymore, all they did was shit talk others. Don't they have a life? A life full of other things than negativity?
"You know what? Fuck you guys. All you do is talk shit. I don't belong here!" I said very angrily and walked away. Finally I had confidence.. Finally I felt victory.
But later I was told that I made Melanie cry. And she couldn't sleep.
I felt quilty.
But why did I feel quilty, when she had to hear that?
She deserved that, so fuck her.
"If you don't love yourself, how in the hell are you going to love somebody else?"
ESTÁS LEYENDO
Scars that Never Heal
Poesía"Depression has played a huge part in my life as long as I can remember. It is my only problem, that plays a huge part in me, that ruins my life, my happiness, my hope and my relationships. I feel worthless, talentless, ugly, stupid, dumb, unlovable...
