Nothing Without You

XVIII: The Liar and His Lover

Now | Adelaide

The office screamed Christian.

It might be because I just saw him but the whole office echoed in his advances, in celebration of his successes and even his failures.

Osama's eyes watched me analyze the layout of what is his supposed office.

"You can already tell everything belongs to him," he said when a second between us passed tersely. The laugh that escaped his lips sounded forced and non-comical. Honestly, it was a surprise considering how often Osama joked about everything. It reminded me of Hasan, of how he made jokes about everything too. "Nothing here belongs to me."

Except your mind, I wanted to say but I didn't. His insecurities weren't my problems to solve. "How are you?" I asked him like it would make this whole situation much better. What I'm about to ask him is either going to ruin his relationship with me forever or ruin his friendship with Christian until the end of time.

Either way, he loses.

"I'd be lying if I said I was great, but I'm not bad. You?"

"Good. Fine," I replied.

Awkwardness filled in the air between us. At least something found comfort in this unwanted space. "I'm sorry for texting you without like," my words fumbled and disconcerted themselves with him.

He smiled, "Without what?"

He knew exactly what I meant, "I'm not usually like this."

"I know," Osama slumped down on a couch and gestured for me to do the same on the one opposite from him.

I did and I wanted to leave. It suddenly felt like a mistake coming here and asking for his help. I'd be a fool to think he wouldn't tell Christian about what I came here for, but I also knew that Osama would give me what I wanted without any questions asked.

That's just the kind of guy he was.

Jokes aside, he was loyal.

Only to Christian, though.

"Remember how in college you told me you hacked into the deans personal documents to expose the nasty stuff he did to students?" My throat jumbled in my throat, choking on nothing and struggled to make sense of words. My brain was unsure of what I was asking him—too slow at processing my question. My disassociated self had a hard time conforming to the situation I was in because of nerves, but this wasn't the first time it happened.

"Yeah," Osama choked back on a laugh. "I remember getting a man who had been dean for over 50 years fired by doing that."

"It was cool," I responded. "And I know you do the same kind of stuff for Christian, but I was wondering..."

I couldn't. It was too much to ask.

"What were you wondering?"

I refused to meet his gaze. One look at me and he'd be able to sense the nerves. In fact, he'd be able to see the part of me that wanted to jump out of my chest and burst into a thousand flames. I couldn't handle this myself but I couldn't bear handing the situation to Osama. He had enough on his plate, I'm sure, yet here I am—

"Addie," he spoke softly. "Breathe."

A part of my body recognized the sensation of breathing, of the tone of voice. It was like Umaima's when she gently placed her hand on my back and shielded me from the world. Osama was doing the exact same thing.

"I'm okay," I breathed heavily. "I just, I don't want to ask you for this but I don't have any other option at the moment."

"I know," he said. "If you had another option you would've picked it."

"But I need to know what it is you need from me in order to help you," he added.

I looked at him and saw a form of gentleness I wanted to be invisible to. It made me feel weak when someone looked at me like I was incapable of solving my own problems—as true as that might be, I was working on no longer being weak, on fighting for a stronger version of myself.

"I need you to do the same kind of thing for me."

"Say what now?"

"You remember my aunt, right?"

He nodded.

"I need you to access her personal documents, photos, videos, bank statements—anything and everything you can possibly find."

He stayed quiet.

"Before you ask why I'm doing this," I focused on a tissue box on the table that separated us. "It's frankly none of your business, but just know that I need this."

Osama untied his hair, running a hand through it. It changed his whole look from composed to completely insane. "Christian's gonna know about this."

"I don't fucking care." Christian involved himself with everything. "As long as you don't give him the information I asked you for, I don't care what you say to him."

Osama stiffened at the comment.

Loyal indeed.

"Will you do it for me?" I stood up as he contemplated what I wanted. "If not, I can try to find someone else."

"I'll do it for you," he replied. "On one condition."

I held back the urge to roll my eyes, "What's the condition?"

A slow, steady smirk formed on his lips. "You tell Christian what you really want from him."

I was confused. What's he talking about? I didn't want anything from Christian, other than to stick a tight pole up his ass.

He put his hands in his pocket as soon as he stood up, one leg in front of the other in a casual way. "You know what I'm talking about, Addie."

"I really don't."

His smile dropped, "Tell Christian the real reason to why you're using him as husband."

This time my whole body stiffened.

I was wrong to think that Osama was any better than Christian.

These two were exactly the same. Only one was more ruthless and right now, I wasn't sure which one it was.

"You know," I said rather than asked. "How?"

"I know a lot about everything, especially with the people that are in Starlight."

"From the look on your face," Osama held a strong, almost mocking expression when I addressed it. "He already knows."

Osama nodded, confirming it.

My back stiffened like a rod. "I'm not the only one using him."

"He's using you too."

"Why?"

"Find yourself someone like me to hack into Moonshine's documents and maybe I'll tell you."

I almost cursed in his face but chose to be the bigger person. "You're a big faker, Osama. That's why you and Christian are so perfect together."

His smile dropped once again.

"You and Christian play life like it's some kind of game, but you're forgetting how life is the rules, not the game itself."

"What's the game then?"

"Humans themselves and so far," I walked to the door, not wanting to spend another second here. "Both of you are failing."

***

Author's Note [May 2, 2023]:

i loooveeeed writing this scene for no particular reason other than it was just fun.

also DONT HATE ON OSAMA, he's a loyal friend and he does love addie, but christian's his number one priority.

anyways, see you soon!

fingers crossed,
izza malik