Chapter 9
Jane stayed up for the remainder of the night mulling over what Lisbon had said, Angela's worn out journal in his hands. It was the same every night, if it wasn't Devils Cherry at the CBI it was Angela's journal. It always fascinated him how a plain, worn out journal could have such an affect on him but every time he read it he could still hear her voice like she was sitting next to him recording every minute of their lives together. It was an anniversary gift from him to her, he can remember it like it was yesterday. Today, however, he couldn't open it. In all reality Devils Cherry was making him worse, his addiction was beginning to affect the people around him and even doing it only when Charlotte was at a sleep over or he had to stay overnight at the CBI wasn't enough. But he couldn't expose her to this, she was his daughter and yet the solution to his addiction was gradually not working. Angela's journal wasn't giving him the same feeling the drug did.
How could Teresa even suggest that? Tell his daughter the truth, what in the world is she thinking!? Jane lets out an irritated sigh, the craving for Devils Cherry always seemed to resurface whenever it came to Charlotte remembering. He wanted so desperately to forget what happened and going under was the only way, Jane couldn't tell Charlotte. What father cries in front of his daughter?
Charlotte was his pride and joy, he loved her so much he wanted to shield her from the world and prevent anything bad from happening. The thought of making her cry tore at him, he didn't want her to have nightmares every night like he did and he couldn't stand the thought of Red John coming after her.
It's settled then, he won't tell her. Charlotte will just have to learn to deal with not knowing.
"Um...dad?"
Jane immediately hides the journal and turns to see Charlotte standing in his doorway.
"We're running late. It's already 8am."
Late?
"Ah so it is, alright Charlotte lets go to the CBI."
He must have stayed up later then he thought. Turning on the car father and daughter make their way to the CBI getting ready to confess the theft she had done.
"You seem happy today."
Jane says breaking the silence.
"I don't regret what happened if that's what you mean."
"Charlotte stealing is wrong, nothing good comes out of committing a crime."
"I disagree, you're finally opening up about mom! This is great!"
He can't get himself to look at her.
"Let's save the questions for this afternoon."
"Okay."
She frowns when they get stuck at a red light, Jane was completely in his own world and she knew that there was no way he'd answer questions tonight.
"Hey dad?"
"Yes?"
"Did you ever take mom to prom?"
It was a silly question but it still struck him to the core, Charlotte was still going to ask questions and as much as they stayed simple for now Jane knew she would eventually reach the incident.
"No. We never went to high school."
"Oh."
Silence.
"What was the wedding like?"
"I said no more questions!"
Jane immediately snaps at her and Charlotte backs down feeling as though she's in trouble. Jane was beyond irritated today and if he didn't find some alternate cure for her curiosity she would eventually remember.
This is all Teresa's fault. Jane thinks to himself. Why does she have to encourage this behavior!?
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