chapter 13
I returned home bringing the bag I brought when I stayed in the apartment sighing heavily dropping my bag to the ground as I slumped into the chair exhausted. I've never been this tired and I just want to take a rest but it seems like I can't sleep.
Taking out a box from my cabinet I opened it to see pictures of me and my family, we look so happy, happy together enjoying every moment that we were together. I smiled looking at all the pictures, setting it aside I took out the locket my mother gave me when I was young. Opening it to see a picture of all of us grinning widely at the camera.
I can't seem to understand what I was feeling, I was angry at myself furious even. They died because of me I didn't try to save them I was selfish to do so. I can feel teardrops falling but I let it flow. How can I even forgive myself? I was born to be alone, no one loving me just me alone.
I kept the box restraining myself from setting it on fire. I slammed it on my bedside table before walking towards the bathroom.
Studying my face looking at myself. I look so broken, so lost. I deserved no one because I was born to be alone no one who can save me, no one.
I cried falling down leaning my back on the cold and hard wall hugging my knees closer to me. I lost them, all of them. My sister left me just like how my parents did. I deserved to die and leave this world. Heck I even was willing to.
Grabing the knife that was hiding on my medicine cabinet I looked at it studying how sharp it was. I shivered at the sudden contact as I brought it closer to my arm pressing it hard. I winced seeing blood all over it. I couldn't feel the pain this wasn't enough. I deserved to feel all the pain that my parents felt when they died, when I couldn't even save them.
Runnin towards my backyard quietly not trying to disturb my neighbors I grabbed a rope with my other arm that was still okay. I walked up to my room grabbing a chair with me. I threw it on the ground as I cried not knowing what I was doing I felt so useless, broken, lifeless.
'You don't deserve to live' I heard voices around me making me cover my ears shutting my eyes afraid that I might see something. I sobbed trying to catch my breath from constant crying as I grabbed the rope climbing on the chair tying it on my ceiling. I cried and cried while doing so.
'WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING!?' I heard someone scream I turned to see Yoongi oppa looking at me angrily.
'EUNBYUL GET DOWN FROM THERE RIGHT NOW' He sternly told me carefully walking towards me
'NO DON'T GO NEAR ME! STAY AWAY FROM ME!' I screamed making him wince, he didn't listen to me instead he kept on going near me.
'D-don't do it E-eubyul, P-please l-listen to o-oppa o-okay?' He nervously said as he carefully grabbed me lifting me to bed.
'I-i'm s-sorry' I cried as I felt him caress my hair telling me it was okay.
Yoongi's POV
I stayed at the apartment because I was too tired to go home. I yawned seeing an empty room that I shared with Seokjin hyung. I lied down on my bed shutting my eyes off.
'Hyung!' I heard someone shout seeing Jimin bringing a bag with him.
'WHAT!?' I shouted at him making him surprised at my sudden scream.
'Jeez hyung no need to shout, I just want to ask you if you could bring this to Eunbyul you know she left it' He handed me the bag walking out of the room. I groaned standing up grabbing my car keys with me. I jogged downstairs to see Jimin and Taehyung playing video games.
