Black Butler/Kuroshitsuji Boyfriend Scenarios (Ciel only)

Reunited

On the 6th week, after you awoke, you found yourself irrevocably pissed. Where the hell were you?! In your own bed? In your own manor? Alone?! 

Alright, you'll admit that doesn't sound bad, but rest assured it was. 

You had a concussion, and during that vulnerable moment where you barely even knew who you were, Ciel left you?! Oh, that little rat!

If he wanted to separate or cut ties, he could have said something instead of just abandoning you the second an opportunity arose.

You began to bicker with yourself. A long-standing insecurity of yours believed that this was his way of breaking up with you—something that he apparently must have been wanting for a while. But something else inside you said that that wasn't quite the reason he let you forget his very existence... You chose to believe the second one for now. 

You had a carriage prepared to go to "Lord Phantomhive's" manor immediately. The carriage ride gave you time to cool down and collect your thoughts. You were still mad, but it wasn't just anger anymore. It was hard for you to admit with how furious you were, but you did miss him. It felt... relieving to finally have that piece of you that was missing for so long finally return.

~ 

Once the carriage stopped, you knocked on the front door—banged actually. Part of you wanted to storm right in—it was basically your house before, so you'd be damned if it wasn't still now—but you decided to follow formalities instead.

Sebastian answered as expected, but he appeared surprised to see you, "Lady (L/N), wha-"

"Where's Ciel?" Formalities be damned apparently.

You saw his demeanor change, and if you had to guess, you assumed he now knew you were back to normal. He stepped aside and told you the young Lord was in his study. "Lord Phantomhive doesn't take visitors without an appointment, I'm afraid." He mentioned cockily as you walked up the stairs. Bloody demon was taking the piss; probably smirking all the while. 

You didn't bother knocking on the study door, you just walked in like normal. "You have some explaining to do, Lord Jackarse!" You declared. 

"(Y/N)...?" He said your name like a question, seemingly surprised but also not. "How is your recovery goin-?"

"Don't small talk me, what was this! Tell me why I've been alone the past few weeks instead of here?" You insisted. You didn't mean to, but your voice was raising the whole time.

"I suppose your memories came bac-"

"No thanks to you." You cut him off again. Your frustration was getting to its crescendo. You could already feel yourself boiling over. Your anger pathetically turned to tears as you bounced anxiously on your toes, unable to stay still. "The second things get tough, you just toss me to the curb like some piece of rubbish. I missed you, you know! I couldn't even remember you, and I still missed you! Do you know how confusing that was?!" 

"I... I didn't think it would turn out like that," He admitted. He looked uncomfortable, and that's probably because you were sobbing before him.

"How could you think it wouldn't turn out like that? What did you expect?" 

"...I didn't think you'd ever regain your memories. Especially since you weren't around anything to jog them." 

"And why would you hope for that?!"

"It was better that way..." He answered quietly that time.

"How...?" You incredulously asked in the same tone. 

"You and I both know what happens around the Phantomhive name." He said despondently, "You'd be in less danger by operating your own affairs on your own. And you'd be less hurt by my passing. If you never got your memories back, it would've been for the best." He sounded solemn, like it was a duty—a sacrifice—he felt needed to be made.

"Ciel...!" You started harsh, but you toned yourself down. He really doesn't get it, does he? He's so messed up—poor thing—that he really doesn't get this. "That's... that's not your decision to make." You finally said. He looked perplexed. "If I get put in danger, so be it. We've been through it before, and we'll be through it again. We both knew what we were getting into when it happened the first time, and I stayed. And... I'm not going to lie—yeah, when Sebastian fulfills your contract... that's going to hurt... but once again, I know what I signed up for-"

"But you didn't sign up for it." Ciel interrupted, "We started a relationship, let it continue, and then you found out. By that point, we were too emotionally involved for you to just leave. That was a trap-"

"But I know now, and I still choose to stay. You can't make these life-changing decisions for me. I would rather keep my happy memories here, with my friends—my family—than be left to my lonesome. I would rather spend as much time with you as possible and be happy that we happened, rather than act as if none of it existed. You don't get to just erase yourself from my life!"

"..." Ciel remained silent. He didn't have anything to defend his stance this time.

"I appreciate that you had my best interests at heart, but you can't decide these things for the both of us. I should get a say in my own life." You were calm now, ironically. Relieved that this got sorted out. Relieved that your insecurities weren't right—far from it. "Do you understand?"

"...I'm sorry."

That was big coming from the Queen's Guard dog. And as much as you appreciated it, you still needed it a step further, "Do you understand?"

"...?" 

You sighed. "You're right. We're in danger often, but that's just something we have to get used to. So if something like this happens again, I need you to understand that you don't get to make those choices for me."

"I understand." He admitted, looking off to the side like a child getting scolded for a misdeed. You supposed it wasn't so different.

"...Good." You nodded. Oh, the tears were back. "So... did you ever miss me...?" You felt awkward for letting the girl-ish side of you get the better, but you were curious. 

"I-" Ciel was about to say something, but he became deterred by his own emotions. "Yes." He decided on a straight-to-the-point response instead, void of emotion. How unsatisfying.

You chose to stop beating around the bush and just do what you wanted. You rounded his desk to hug him, but with his position, that ended up with you sitting on his lap. This was no gentle, dainty, proper hug of a lady—no, you hugged him tight, as if trying to constrict him. I guess with how mad you were before and the possibility of any lingering feelings, that might've been the case, but for the most part, you think it was just longing. You cried on his shoulder, and he held you firmly in return. 

It took you a few minutes to notice, but he put his face in the crook of your neck, calm and steady breaths leaving him. That was something he did when he was calm or destressing from work. Maybe he really did miss you too.

You stayed like that for an hour or so—just basking in each others presence after so many weeks—but you finally broke the silence once you noticed the sun start to set. Carriage riding was best to do before nightfall. 

"...I suppose I should be on my way." You muttered against his shoulder before lightly pushing off him. Your things were still at your manor so you would have to return for tonight at least. 

"Back to your manor?" Ciel replied. "What for?" 

"My everything? Nothing's here anymore." You laughed, but the humor wasn't there.

Ciel's firm grip didn't loosen up to let you go though. He didn't move you back to his shoulder either, but he did place himself back into the crook of your neck. "Sebastian will set up a guest room tonight. He'll fetch your things from your manor in the morning, and they'll all be here again before we wake up." He concluded. He sunk back into his office chair, subsequently bringing you down with him. 

You relaxed back into Ciel and relented. "It's hard to argue with that..." I guess you were staying tonight. 

It was so good to be back home.