A Prairie Rose

Chapter 2

Pa's eagerness to build seemed to slow as the days went on. That first day, he cut down four trees, making half of a foundation for a house. The next day, he cut down three, then only one the following day- then we had a foundation, but no more trees being cut. Pa was back to just sitting, drinking, and cussing. 

Days passed. Then weeks. I tried to get Pa to set back to work at chopping trees down sometimes, to no avail. 

"Hey, Pa," I would say suddenly- usually after serving him a warm tin of coffee. "It sure looks like a nice day out. Want me to fetch the axe?"

But I would always just get a grunt, or sometimes even a reprimanding smack for speaking out of turn. So I would just sigh, and turn to watch the sky fade from a warm blue spattered with whispy white clouds to an orange glow.

That was when I sent myself to bed. Ma had always said good little girls should be in bed before it was dark. I wanted to be good for her, even if Pa didn't.

Then, after I don't know how many days, I heard a sound in the distance. It roused me from my sleep- which was rather uncomfortable in my flannel underwear, stockings, petticoat, chemise, and dress. But even in this rather warm weather, the nights could be so chilled and the wind so harsh that it was needed. It had been far warmer when Ma was alive- she would help me into my nightgown and wrap quilts around me until I felt I was in a safe, warm caccoon.

For several seconds, I just laid on the stool I had been sleeping on, wondering if I had just dreamt the sound. But no, there it was again- a banging sound in the distance. I wondered if Pa had wandered off to hunt, and hesitantly rose to my feet- I did not want to be left alone in this place, where I so often heard nearby wolves howling and coyotes barking. 

Pa was just where I had left him-sitting near the fading fire. 

"Pa?" I asked, wondering how he was not chilled at this time of night. "Did you hear that?"

He nodded, taking another sip from his bottle. "There must be others, settling in nearby. Two miles North, I'd reckon. I wonder if they have any whiskey they want to trade for blankets or food."

Wearily, I glanced back the pile of blankets- they were hardly enough to keep me warm through the night, and when Pa finally went to bed, he pulled a few off of me to lay over himself. And the food was running low now. He wouldn't truly trade away things we needed so desperately for whiskey, would he?

But Pa had never been the joking type.

He took another drink from his bottle, staring off in the direction the sound had come from. Another shot sounded. Then the sound of a dog barking. 

Pa looked at me. "Go on back to bed now, Rose."

I swallowed hard, trying to rid myself of the anxiety I felt creeping up my chest and into my throat as I turned to duck back under the cover of the wagon. "Yes, Sir."

 The next morning, I was awoken earlier than usual- the sun was hardly up, the sky still mostly dark. But there was a loud thud! that seemed to shake the earth, and rattle my very bones. I jumped up and hurried out of the wagon, wondering if the long journey had left it crumbling. Surely if the wagon collapsed on top of me, the weight would be enough to kill me!

But it was not the wagon at all- it was a tree. Pa was there, as were three other men, pulling it with a rope towards the foundation Pa had started- it was two logs higher now.

I stood there in amazement, watching as the four of them hefted the next log up atop the others. For several minutes I just watched, until Pa caught sight of me peeking out from the side of the wagon.

"Rose, don't stand there and gawk like a little imbecile," Pa scolded my manners. I was glad he wasn't close enough to strike me, but I still flinched at his tone. "Go bring us some water. And warm the rest for coffee."

"Yes, Pa!" I said, wincing as I turned on my heel- I had forgotten that it was the only sore spot left on me, where the scabs and bruises had not yet fully healed from walking so far to get to the new country. But the bucket was almost empty, so I picked it up and carried it down the short path through the grass that had been made from my frequent treks to the river for refills. 

My dress was too short on me- even for my age. The hem needed to be brought down some, but Ma wasn't here to do it, and she had brought it down twice already. I wasn't sure there was anything left to bring down. But it worked fine enough, because as I stepped into the water to pull from the current, my dress was not soaked at all. The early morning was chilled enough that I was grateful for that.

Once water and coffee had both been served, Pa told me to start making johnny-cakes over the fire- lots, he said. I was nervous, knowing I was not very skilled at actually cooking things- Ma had always told me I was too young to do any actual cooking, and had given me other chores to help with meals. But I couldn't disobey a direct order from Pa, so I set to work mixing cornmeal, water, and salt. We were low on sugar, and had been out of bacon for a long time, so those were the only three ingredients we had. I scraped a bit of molasses from the bottom of the bucket, though, to try and add some sweetness.

When I brought the plate over to serve the men, Pa took the whole thing from me. "You go on and find yourself some hardtack to eat now, Rose. Stay out of the way."

I fought to keep the disappointment off my face. Hardtack was all we had eaten for months- the hard, dry biscuits were made of nothing but flour and water, and were cooked for so long to preserve them that they sucked all the wetmess from your mouth, and could even make you bleed as you chewed from how pointy the hard corners were when you bit into them.

But the men had already turned away from me, and one of them was talking to Pa about how he would bring that whiskey over later in exchange for the food. Pa laughed and said he would collect it himself- he had some blankets he wanted to try and haggle over, too, and he would bring them with. 

I did my best to ignore the loud voices nearby as I chewed on my breakfast of hardtack and water. I tried to dip my biscuit into the water to make it easier to eat, but then it was just soggy on the outside and dry on the inside. 

As I walked, I did not notice how far I was getting from the wagon, and the men working on a new house for us. I supposed I should be grateful to them- I was being awfully naughty by being upset over them getting better food than me when they were the ones building a home. I wondered if angels could hear thoughts- Ma would have been awfully disappointed if she were reading mine just then. She probably would have punished me and sent me to apologize.

Ma always made me apologize. She said apologizing was important. But it was a whole lot easier to force myself to do when she was pulling me by the ear and demanding it, and I was a coward, so I did not go and apologize to the men. I just kept walking, struggling to chew on my hardtack.

A sudden rustling in the bush just beside where I was walking made me jump. My eyes immediately flew back to camp- it was far. Too far for the men to reach me in time if a wolf jumped out at me. Maybe even too far for Pa to shoot it, especially if he had been drinking. He may even hit me, instead.

Did any of the other men have guns? I couldn't remember. But surely they would not have wandered the several miles to our camp through the wilderness of the west unarmed?

A rabbit sudden darted out of the bush, zig-zagging through the grass and disappearing into another bush, closer to the river. I couldn't help but giggle to myself, but then I felt a shiver run up my spine.

What had it been running from?

I rushed back towards the sound of men's voices, dropping my hardtack on the way. Maybe whatever was chasing that poor rabbit would like hard, stale biscuits more than little girls. 

But that hard tack was still laying there the next day, when the men came back to keep helping Pa build our house. And the next day, and the next day.

It seemed nothing in the whole world liked the food I had to eat for breakfast. And I couldn't blame them one bit.