The Hurt Game

❧ fifty-two

"You're home early," Royden said as I closed the door behind me. I didn't look at him, simply dropped my bag on the ground. I shrugged off my coat and hung it on the rack. "Wait, what's wrong?"

I inhaled deeply as I forced myself to look at him. Having cried in the car all the way home should be enough. I even stayed fifteen minutes longer in the car to completely calm down.

It wasn't enough.

My bottom lip trembled and I shook my head as tears rose. Royden shot from the couch, groaning slightly, but ignoring it just the same. He cupped my head in his warm, large hands. He made me look at him, but I shook my head and collapsed in his arms as sobs overwhelmed me.

"Hey, sh. I've got you. I've got you. I'm here," he murmured as he held me close to him. He kissed my head, rubbed his hands over my back to calm me down and whispered sweet nothings in my ear. However none of it helped, none of it could turn back what happened.

"The store is closed, for good. It is bankrupt," I managed to say.

"Oh my god," he breathed. "I am so sorry, love. I'm sorry."

"It is of-of-official and n-nothing-nothing can be done."

"Okay, hey, first, let it all out. Then speak," he murmured, and I did. I sobbed in his chest for another fifteen minutes, hiccups disrupting the sobs that wrecked my body.

Eventually all tears were cried out and Royden let me over towards the couch. As I hiccupped and sniffled, he prepared me a hot chocolate. No words were spoken and I appreciated the silence.

When the hot chocolate was done, he came back to me. He placed on the table and sat down next to me, wrapping his arm around my shoulders.

"Do you want to tell me what happened? You said the store is bankrupt," he quietly said.

I nodded my head, sniffling. "Yeah... Arthur told me this morning. I knew it was going bad, but I... I had never hoped it would actually lead to this point. Silently I had hoped for it to stay, to make it through, but..."

"But it didn't," he finished my sentence. I nodded my head and breathed out a shaky breath. He pressed his lips against my temple softly. "I can't imagine what it must be like."

"It is hell," I murmured as I looked down at my fingers. My nails were ripped and short―ugly and unladylike, but screw that. It was a time of heartbreak and crisis. "I don't know what I'm supposed to do now and I know it's stupid to be this upset about a bookstore, but―"

"No, I want you to stop there," Royden cut me off. I looked up at him with teary vision. His hand cupped my face as he brushed the fallen tears away. "It is not stupid to be upset about a bookstore. It has been a home to you for so long. You're allowed to upset, Wave. It was a home and you lost that. That is painful."

I bit on my lip as I nodded my head, letting my forehead fall against his collarbone. "I just... I wish I could have done something. Everything seems to fall apart and I see it happening right in front of me, but I can't do anything."

Royden stayed silent as his arm tightened around me. His chin rested on the top of my head. His hand rubbed my back in soothing circles.

We stayed like that for a long time. My eyes were closed and I must have dozed off, because a lot of time seemed to have past. Royden had moved to lean against the cushions of the couch and I was curled up beside him.

My temples were throbbing and I knew another headache was coming soon. I rubbed my eyes and stretched my legs, popping my knee. I sat up and looked at the empty mug sitting on the table. I had never had a chance to drink that hot chocolate.

"I can make you a new one," Royden said. His hand came to rest on my back and I looked back at him.

I nodded my head with a little smile. "That would be lovely."

"And I was thinking of still having that movie marathon and some take-out. Pizza, or Chinese, or Tai. Whatever you like. We can also make something if you prefer. Whatever you want."

A chuckle escaped my lips and I nodded my head. "You're quite perfect, do you know?" I whispered.

He was grinning as he leaned forward and came face to face with me. Our noses touched. A wider smile spread on my face as his hand came up to my neck.

"Nowhere close as you," he breathed before pressing his lips against mine. I kissed him back immediately, on instinct. Kissing him was as easy as breathing, as familiar as the taste of a mocha coffee. It was being wrapped in a warm blanket, as stepping in a warm bath or feeling those first sunrays on your face after a cold winter.

Royden felt like home. I could repeat it as much as I wanted to, but all those times wouldn't add up to how much I loved him, to how much he meant to me. Something much more than love existed between us.

Our lips moved in sync. His tongue touched my bottom lip and I parted my lips more, meeting his tongue with mine. My heartbeat quickened in my chest. A fire rose in my lungs.

His hands slid down my neck to my waist and slowly he pulled me on his lap. My legs were on either side of him. My hands were tangled in his hair.

A fire burned in my chest and I pulled away. Oxygen flooded my lungs as I gasped for air. His lips travelled down my jawline to my neck. He pressed little, sweet kisses on my skin.

I bit on my lip as my eyes were closed. My head fell back as his kisses were laid on my throat. A low moan escaped my mouth.

Unfortunately Royden leaned back, leaving my skin cold and bare and alone. I tilted my head down to look at him, meeting his love-struck gaze.

"You're so beautiful," he said earnestly.

I smiled and leaned forward to press a kiss on his lips. "And you're the best boyfriend I have ever had."

"I'm the only boyfriend you've ever had."

"Not exactly true," I said while leaning back to sit on his knees. He raised an eyebrow, waiting for an explanation. "I had one in high school, but he played me."

Royden furrowed his eyebrows. "What a dick. What did he do?"

"He made a bet with his friends, said how he could make everyone fall for him. It wasn't an entirely fair bet, because I was already kinda into him, but still... I was just a bet."

"Fucking douche," he grumbled. His hands ran up and down my thighs as he looked past my shoulder. "Did you ever see him again? After high school."

"Nope. Left for a school in Scotland, I think it was. I don't know and frankly, I don't care. It is in the past and I have a much better boyfriend now." I was smiling brightly, matching the sparkle in his eyes. He bit his bottom lip and squeezed my hips. Warmth surrounded me. "And that lovely boyfriend will make some pasta with me now."

I jumped off his lap and headed in the kitchen. "Oh, and he is making me a hot chocolate."

Royden laughed wholeheartedly and got off the couch, walking towards me. He wrapped an arm around my waist from behind. "And all because I love you so much."

He released me anddid actually make me a hot chocolate. He helped me prepare a delicious pastaand all this time I was grinning. He was good at making me forget things.