The Summer Before

Chapter Fifty

Tessa

"You really love me?" I asked.

"I've always loved you, Tessa. Even when you broke my heart, even when I wanted to hate you, I loved you."

Levi moved closer. "And I'm done trying not to love you, Tessa, because that's impossible. I can't carve you out of my heart. Not when the whole damn thing belongs to you."

The air rushed from my lungs. His words were beautiful. They were everything I always wanted to hear, but I was still afraid. Everything that happened this summer, everything that had come to light- it was overwhelming.

I wanted to say the words- the ones that were stuck on the edge of my tongue, but something stopped me. Everything that had happened between us this summer was weighing on my mind. Add to that the information Colin shared along with Levi's confession; I was struggling to process everything.

My heart was aching to say the words I knew were true, but my mind was still cautious. I couldn't forget how badly he'd hurt me last summer and how I'd discovered it was all for revenge. The logical part of me was trying to save me from harm, but was that really what I wanted?

Another tear fell from my eyes, only to be brushed gently away by Levi. His touch felt amazing, so familiar and warm. I couldn't help but lean into him as he tried to comfort me.

"I don't know if I can do this, Levi. There's so much to process. I- I just don't know." My words were shaky as I struggled to get them out.

I looked at Levi, who was regarding me sadly. His head bobbed slowly. "I understand, Tess. Take all the time you need, but please consider it. One more chance, that's all I ask. Whenever you're ready."

That's reasonable, right?

I can give him that, can't I?

I wanted to say yes. My heart was begging me to, but still, I hesitated. Levi's eyes grew sad, almost as if he could read my mind.

"You don't have to answer me now. Just consider it. Please."

He started to remove his hand. Before he could, I reached out, grabbing his wrist, not ready to feel the absence of his warmth. Startled at my own reaction, I released his hand, letting warm air fill the space between us.

I needed to breathe. Being so close to him was clouding my mind, and I couldn't afford to be rash about my decision. I took a step back, putting some distance between us. I didn't miss the look of hurt in Levi's eyes as I did.

"I need to think," I whispered.

From the corner of my eye, I could see him nod. Sadness was overtaking his features, making my heart ache. "Do you want me to leave?"

I nodded, holding back the dam of tears threatening to spill from my eyes.

He wouldn't look at me, choosing instead to focus on the floor. Levi nodded as he said, "I'll let you think in peace."

He started for the door, pausing feet away to turn and say, "Goodbye, Tessa. I'm sorry again for everything I put you through."

Levi reached for the handle, ready to leave me be and let me have the space I told him I needed. There was something in the look on his face that pulled at my heartstrings. He looked like a man who'd lost everything. And that killed me.

Before he could open the door, I sprang into action. "Levi, wait!"

I rushed over to him, watching as surprise etched its way onto his face. I didn't have my answer yet, but I couldn't let him leave like that, not after everything we'd been through. My heart couldn't take it.

He stared at me, waiting patiently as I decided what to do next. I didn't have a plan when I stopped him from walking out that door. All I knew was I couldn't leave things between us like this.

He'd come all this way to try to win me back. It felt wrong to let him leave feeling so dejected. I reached out my hand. "Let me see your phone."

Levi's eyes widened at my words. After the initial shock wore off, he reached into his pocket, pulling out his device. He unlocked it before handing it over.

I gave him a small smile before opening up his contacts. I typed in my name, prepared to add my new number. It was a shock when my old contact information popped up on the screen with a note saying it was no longer in service.

He saved it. After all this time, he never deleted it.

I looked up at Levi, only to find him watching me curiously. My throat knotted, and I had to look away. I quickly swapped my new number for my old one and handed the phone back to him.

He gave the slightest hint of a smile as I told him what I'd done. Before sliding the phone back into his pocket, I noticed a grateful look pass over him. It was a small gesture on my part, but to him, it seemed like it meant the world.

"I still need time, but this way, you have a way to contact me if you need to."

A moment passed before he said anything. When he did, I felt myself being pulled into a warm embrace. Levi hugged me gently as he whispered, "Thank you."

My head bobbed in reply as my arms circled around his neck, returning his hug. I didn't trust my voice to say anything at that moment, still too emotional from everything that had transpired.

The embrace seemed to last for ages, yet it ended too soon. Levi squeezed my hand one last time when we parted before heading for the door.

As he stood with his hand on my now open door, he turned to me and said, "I'll give you all the time in the world, Tessa. I'll give you anything. You just have to ask."

With that, he turned, closing the door behind him. I rested my head on the oak slab, trying to process everything that happened, when my phone dinged with an incoming message.

My heart leaped, thinking it was Levi. When I opened my screen, I saw a text from Charlotte asking if I wanted them to come inside to say goodbye. I'd forgotten that anyone else was there after my talk with Levi.

Thoughts were swirling in my head, and my emotions were running wild. All I wanted was time alone to try to sort through everything. I felt terrible but sent her a text saying I just wanted to be alone, promising to make a trip back to Raleigh soon to visit. Charlotte quickly responded, saying they all understood and reminded me to call her if I needed to talk.

Shortly after, I heard the car start up and watched out my window as it disappeared down the street. My mind was still racing ten minutes later when I received another text.

I opened it, expecting to see a message from Colin or Jason. But the text was from an unsaved number. My heart sped up as I read and reread the message.

Unknown: Thank you for hearing me out today. Just so you know, I meant every word. You're worth waiting for, Tess.       -Levi

My eyes stung as fresh tears welled within them. I didn't know what to say, so I said nothing. After what happened today, only one thing is certain. I have no idea what to do next. 

A/N: 

Aw, Levi... At least this is a step in the right direction. Maybe there's hope for them after all...