Fatal Attraction.

25

True to Fai'za's words I feel better with her here. Fareed is in his stroller sleeping peacefully by the side.

"This is my sister in law Fai'za"
She smiles at her "Welcome Fai'za. I guess you'll be Ruqayyah's rock"

I chuckle.
"So—we'll continue were we stopped yesterday so can you tell me his name? The man you forgot".

I shake my head "No matter how much I'm told or being reminded I always forget his name"
"It's Sahil, that's his name" Fai'za answers "I asked her brother on our way here".

She nods.
"So? What is the issue here? There's a problem I'm not aware of"

I take a deep breath "The truth is I forgot him the moment I met my husband and I'm scared maybe all the feelings I have for him transferred to my husband so I'm scared that maybe remembering him might mean I lose the love I feel for my spouse. That's why I was hesitant about remembering".

She smiles "No, I can promise you that it won't be the case"
"Are you sure?"

"Yes but there's a fifty percent possibility you'll might lose yourself to depression like you did before but the good part about it is you have other people you love, I don't mean your siblings or parents but you love your husband and your son—with them it might not turn out to be a huge issue as it was before".

I nod "So what exactly is wrong with me?"
He takes in a deep breath, I immediately hold onto Fai'za's hands.
"You have what is called a Dissociative Amnesia. It occurs when a person blocks out certain events often associated with stress or trauma that causes a disconnection with memories, surroundings, actions and identity"

"Can you please elaborate?" I ask nervously.
"It usually develops as a reaction to trauma and help keep difficult memories at bay. It might also be the reason for the depression you had when you were pregnant"
Fai'za and I look at each other then back at her.

"So what can I do? How can I get my memory back? Is there a treatment? Or pills I need to take?"
"Well—an episode of amnesia usually occurs suddenly and may last minutes, hours or rarely months or years so I'm not sure when or if you will recover your memories. But as for treatment, it can only be through psychotherapy and medication"

"What's that?" Fai'za asks.
"It's a treatment by verbal communication and treatment"
"So I can get both?"

She nods "Yes and they'll help with that nagging feeling you said you keep having. So both treatments will be until you recover your memories"
I stayed quiet.
What else was I to say?
I'm a mental case.

She huffs "Look, this disorder usually develops as a way to cope with trauma but there is a possibility that it could be genetic"
I gasp.

She smiles "But don't worry too much, it's just a 20% possibility. For now let's focus on medication and therapy"
I nod.

"For now I'll prescribe some drugs for you, make sure you take them and we'll schedule a weekly meeting for the psychotherapy. But for that you'll need to inform your husband, the treatment is more liable to work with emotional attachment"
I nod "Thank you".

::

"So? You gonna tell him?" Fai'za asks as soon as I start driving.
"I have no other choice but I can't deny that I'm scared"

She smiles "Ya Rashad will understand, just try to explain it"
I huff "I don't want him to think—"

She cuts me off "—that you don't genuinely love him? I doubt he'd think that. Your relationship has evolved a lot and I think part of the reason it has is because you two care and understand each other"

I take a deep breath "I'm not too sure. I don't know what to do"
"Okay, when is he coming back?"

I smile "You don't know when your brother is coming back?"
She shrugs laughing "Yeah, he says I should ask you instead, his wife".

I giggle.
"Now you're laughing, because he called you his wife?"
I say nothing as I focused on the road.

"If you want we can talk to him together?" She suggests.
I smile "Thank you, you've been with us for so long. Taking care of Fareed hasn't been easy either and you've been doing all that without complaining.

She shakes her head.
"I'm not complaining because I enjoy it. I love taking care of my nephew and I love being around you and my brother as well, it's better than sitting at home alone or living with Ya Zoya. I prefer things this way"
I smile "Still, I'm thankful"

She nods looking back to check Fareed.
"He's still sleeping"
I groan "I guess we won't be sleeping tonight".

::

Nasir's POV.

I was pissed.
I really can't explain why but I was.
I came to see Mama after I heard what transpired between she and Zoya.

She folds her arms, raising her head.
"Mama, what did you tell Zoya?"
She ignores my question completely.

"Mama?!" I shout.
She jumps startled "What? What do you want from me?"

"What did you tell Zoya?"
She shrugs "I just didn't pay any attention to her"

I huff.
One of the reasons I fell inlove with Zoya was the fact that she didn't give a damn about our differences. Her father is terribly rich and mine was going through serious financial issues but it didn't matter to her. Even when everyone talked about how incompatible we were she still loved me and I appreciated her for that. But I came to realize after getting married to her that she didn't do it because she loved me. It was because she loved the idea of being above me and I beneath her, she loved it when my family treated her like a goddess and the amount of attention she got.

Even with everything happening I don't want other people treating her terribly. If I do it, fine but no one else and that's why I had to get that bartender fired even if it meant they all get caught.

"Just—let me handle my business. I didn't you you so you'd overreact and act out". I storm out.

::