Searching for Myself

What Not To Do

WYATT

Abbie snaps out of her stupor to see everyone off. Hugs and congratulations are given. As soon as I shut the door behind Andy, who's holding Jerra, I pull Abbie into my arms. She exhales with relief and I feel all the tension slip from her body. I'm scared. She's not acting like herself. I'm not sure this is what she really wants and I'm terrified she's about to change her mind. It is fast. I'm well aware of how our relationship went from zero to full speed in no time at all. We skipped a bunch of parts to be getting married and having a baby. I'm also cognizant of the fact that this is almost history repeating itself. I've already done this. I got a girl pregnant then married her. It's not the same though. This time it's happening with the right woman and I am beyond excited. I knew a long time ago that she was what I wanted. For Abbie though, she was blindsided by all of this. I'm not sure she knows how to feel right now then to throw a baby into the mix... Wow. She's giving me a baby. The woman I love is giving me a baby. My grip tightens around her at the thought. This is seriously surreal. I now have everything I've ever wanted. My life is truly complete.

"Abbie, my love..." Her bright blue eyes meet mine. "I feel like we cornered you into something you're not ready for." I hear the emotion in my voice, but I can't help it. I'm terrified. "I want you to be happy. I don't want you to feel forced into this. You should be over the moon happy right now. I am."

"My love? I like that."

"My love," I whisper out before pecking her lips. "Love you."

"Love you. I am happy, Wyatt. I'm just... in shock. Honestly, I think the rational side of my brain is battling with my heart. My heart is madly in love with a man and his daughter." I give her hands a small squeeze. "My heart knows it's ready. Now my brain on the other hand is saying whoa, slow down. You've hardly dated. You can't get married yet. We're having a baby though, so that changes this a bit even if I don't want it to."

"Get out of your brain and focus on your heart then." She giggles at me, so that's got to be a good sign. "How about we spend the rest of the night celebrating our engagement? We'll think of all the logistics and how crazy we are later. Sound good?"

"Ok, but I need to tell Morgan first. She'll be devastated that she's not the first to know." She rushes away from me and grabs her cell to video chat her.

"Happy Turkey Day, my Abs!" Morgan sings. "How'd your dinner turn out? You stuffed on turkey?" I settle on the couch near Abbie.

"Not exactly. Dinner got sidetracked a bit."

"That sucks. You went through all that and you didn't get to enjoy it? What happened?"

"I got to enjoy it, I just didn't go back for seconds."

"Abigail," she says with some kind of warning. That's strange. Maybe I'm misreading her tone of voice, it just sounds off.

"What?"

"I told you we weren't doing this anorexic shit again and I meant it." What the hell? Anorexia? My eyes sweep over Abbie's body. She gained back the weight she lost that week she was depressed. Did that affect the baby at all? "I thought you were better since you and Wyatt got back together."

She looks really nervous when she glances at me. I don't think she wanted me to know about it. That's concerning. She looks back at Morgan and shakes her head at her. "Why do you always assume the worst?"

"Since my baby girl is too far away to keep a close eye on."

"Well you have nothing to worry about. I actually have some news. Some pretty big news."

"You're pregnant?"

"Shut up," she rolls her eyes with a snicker. I take it Morgan knows. Makes sense. I doubt she'd go through all of this alone. It hurts that she didn't turn to me right away. I get her reasonings, but it's still upsetting. When did she first find out? How did she feel in that moment? I have a lot of questions here.