Never Set In Stone

chapter four

I wanted no association with them afterwards. I wanted nothing to do with her. But what sucked was that I wanted nothing to do with him either. In my entire life I've been in two relationships and when we broke up, I was acceptant with it each time. Losing a boyfriend is one thing. But losing a friend is much, much different.

Boyfriends are mere strangers when you first meet them and you can only attach to them so much. Best friends are different because in time you become their person. They are the person that holds you together and the one you tell absolutely everything to. Once that's gone, it's like a large part of your life just slipped away.

If I thought I was hurt by Zach or any of my other flings or exes, it was much worse with JD. Throughout my life I've always had problems with becoming friends with girls for these reasons. They were too drama centered and always pretended to actually care about your feelings when truly they were just waiting for a perfect moment of jealousy or pain or anger, something that will make them start an argument. When JD came along, he was the perfect friend but his girlfriend took all of that away from me.

For months afterwards, I became increasingly depressed because I never thought that I could ever have a person like him in my life and I couldn't find anything to account for it. Ashlee was my only friend left and she tried everything in her power to make things better for me. With nothing else on my agenda and no one else to hang out with, I became a part of her friend group. I started going to parties and getting to know incredible people and having so much fun with them.

At a Halloween party that I was invited to, there was a moment where I felt so alive, and a person that I shared it with. Wearing a similar opposing outfit to mine, was this boy I admired strictly by what he was wearing. With all of the accessories, this guy wore an entire cowboy outfit that contrasted to my space cowgirl look. As soon as we saw each other from across the room, we instantly knew that a conversation was brewing.

He slowly started walking towards me and once he reached me he said, "Howdy, I'm Ryan."

"Howdy? A true cowboy, I see. I'm Delilah by the way."

"That's a really pretty name for a really pretty girl."

I honestly started to blush, "Thank you."

"So are you friends with Emily?"

"Actually, no, I'm friends with Ashlee but Emily invited me, what about you?"

"Me too," he laughs in his deep tone, "Like I know Emily, I come to a lot of her parties but it's all been because of Ashlee." I nod, not knowing what else to say until he continues, "I've seen you around school. Not in a creepy way or anything. Just I-I, damn how do I say this without me sounding weird? I just see you around a lot. I've always wanted to talk to you but I never had a good enough reason to, you know."

"I get that, well now you have every reason to talk to me," I smile.

We talked pretty much the entire night and things got pretty far for us. We learned a lot about each other and on top of that we took steps further. I never was this forward with anyone before, but here I was about to kiss this stranger who took off our cowboy hats for our lips to meet. And here we go.

That same night, I spent the night over Ashlee's house and almost the whole time we were talking about Ryan. While I would ask her questions about what he's like since she's one of his closest friends, she would ask me questions about what I had thought about him. But it was clear. Otherwise, that kiss would have never even happened.

"So you like him? A lot? I'm guessing. That is also only because I saw that kiss. Delilah, that is literally the dream kiss that any girl would want. But you like him? Cause honestly, at one point or another I was planning on setting you up with Ryan. He's just your type," she kept talking and talking. Where I was originally from, cowboys were pretty much everywhere so I was shocked to see one appear in the city.