Wanderlust [ editing ]

27. The Fall

I stumble out of the club ignoring people's "hey!" and "watch it!" I need to get out of here. How dare Abel treat me like I'm a 13 year old. I'm a grown woman. If I want to wear a dress and heels and drink at a club then I will do it! He totally embarrassed me in front of that blonde guy, the people around us and the bartender. I swear they probably thought I was his sister or something.

"Objectifying" myself. Ha, as if.

' What am I? 15? Can I not dress how I want and have a drink without Abel acting like my guardian or something. As if I didn't notice those girls. As if I don't know what happened.

Let me tell y'all what happened earlier.

After everything that went on with Abel at the apartment last night I felt really bad. I mean, Abel is a good guy and he was sticking up for me. I love him for that. Maybe it's the way he said it that just seemed so - rude. Anyways, I felt really sad especially because I knew he was at the club last night. I got him so upset, I practically begged him to go. I practically told him to go out and drink and be with other girls. So I was really upset about that. I knew I provoked him and I was too scared to text him after the fight because I thought he would snap at me or one of his friends would. It's something Hawk would do, I know for sure. So I decided to let him be. I figured he needed some time for himself, you know? To cool off.

But around 1 AM I couldn't take it. I missed him so much. Being away from Abel hurts especially since he was angry with me. I can't stand when he's mad at me and I can't stand being mad at him. We love each other. We aren't supposed to be fighting and ignoring each other. We're both adults acting like children, arguing like this. Waiting for one to text the other.

So I came up with a little plan. I walked into my room and went into my closet. I stood on my tippy toes to reach the top shelf. I grabbed a black little box. For Christmas I got Abel this really nice gold watch with his name engraved on the back of it. It was really expensive, but he's worth my every penny. I didn't get to give it to him because of everything that went on with my dad and I was saving it for a perfect moment and that was it. I thought that he'd see that I do love him and that we could fix things.

After sleeping a bit, I woke up at 3:45 am when the alarm I set rang. The second part of my plan was to go to Abel's apartment while he's asleep. Okay, this isn't stalkerish or anything. He gave me the key 2 weeks ago. So I wanted to go in and put the watch on him then fall asleep and wake up next to him. He'd notice the watch, I'd apologize, hopefully he would too, and we'd have make up and then all would be well.

I arrived at his place at 4:32 AM. It took me awhile to get there because I took shower and packed an outfit for the next day. I opened the glass front doors that led into the lobby.

"Hello Miss. Krissa." I was greeted by the night security.

"Hi Mr.Andrew. I'm just going to go see Abel." He nodded and let me by the lobby.

I got into the elevator and pressed the button that read "28." After waiting and hearing the ding from each floor, the elevator doors opened and I stepped out onto the red carpet. I walked down the hallway till I reached "65." I stood in front of the apartment door. I dug into my bag and got the key. Just as I was about to put the key in the slot the door slowly opens and my heart stopped a little.

Like a tower over me stood 2 beautiful and I mean really beautiful ladies. Their heels were in their hands, their hair was all messy. I knew what happened. I wasn't born yesterday.

"Hey." The blonde one said with a smirk on her face.

"Hi."

"Nice sweatpants." She said sarcastically "You are?"

Me. She asked who am I!! Who was SHE?

I hesitated, If I told her I'm Abel's girl she'll probably be satisfied that she slept with my man, so I played it cool.

"I just come in the mornings to clean Mr.Tesfaye's apartment." I said trying my hardest to not sound angry which I SO was.

"Oh. Well, okay. Sorry." She steps out and the other girl follows.

She sucked her teeth and shrugged "We made a mess." And then she and the other girl disappear down the hallway.

So many things were running through my head. Could it be true? He cheated on me? I mean, he's done it before! Of course it's possible. And he confirmed it tonight!

The reason I got all dressed up tonight was to show Abel I can be who he wants me to be. That, unlike him, I'm willing to change for us. So I borrowed my friend's dress and got my hair done and makeup. I figured that Abel wanted a girl who is into the things he's into and it's not a problem, I can do that. I'm willing to change for a person. I'm willing to make sacrifices for love, but no. Once again Abel took me for granted. Theres just no pleasing that man! What more can I do? I don't go to clubs or parties and I'm boring. I go to clubs and parties and I'm suddenly a target for men?! I am not!
I make my way out of the club. I stomp my heels harder and harder on the ground. I'm angrier by the minute. I open the door and cool air hits my face. I wipe the tears (caused by frustration) out of my face. I take my hair and twist it, then twist it again into a bun then I secure it with the black hair tie that's around my wrist. Before I can finish taking a big breath the door behind me opens and out comes Abel.

"Krissa! Wait." he pulls my arm.

"Don't touch me!" I pull away.

"What's going on? Why are you acting like this?" He asks

"Why do you treat me like this? I'm your girlfriend. You act as if I'm just another girl."

"I don't know what -"

"THOSE GIRLS!" I cut him off "I know you slept with them. I went by your apartment to give you this" I take the watch out of my purse and throw it at him "BUT instead I was greeted by 2 girls who you had sex with."

"I'm sorry"

"So that's what you do now? we get into an argument so you go out and have sex with other girls?" I cross my arms.

"That's different." He picks up the watch from the ground and dusts it off.

"No the fuck it isn't. You are so selfish and inconsiderate and I am done. I swear I am done."

"Done?" he steps closer to me and I step back "What do you mean by that?"

"I say what I mean. I'm done with this relationship. I don't want this anymore."

"Don't say that"

"DONE!" with that I walk away.

I'm tired of putting up with this. Its like he wants me but he doesn't. It's this never ending cycle and I'm sick of it. I deserve more than what he gives me. I know what I deserve and I'm sure as hell that this isn't it. Maybe one day Abel will learn how to be in a relationship and treat a woman but I refuse to be his lab rat. I don't want to be constantly stressing over him. Not anymore. I'm sick of it. I'm done.