Lose My Mind *Jay McGuiness Fan Fic* (FINISHED)

Chapter 4

Jay POV

Max and I got quiet and turned towards the door to the basement, we heard the door closed. We stopped and looked at each other. He just shook his head without saying a word he gathered his stuff in his hand and started walking up the stairs and then stopped midway and turned to look at me.

"Mate you need to tell her, especially if she just heard us. She has a lot of questions and if you want her to love you and trust you, you need to be honest and truthful." with that he walked out leaving me with my thoughts. I decided to check on Juls and the kids. I walked up stairs, it was all too quiet. walking in the living room I notice the kids sitting in front of the TV watching cartoons. Kissing each one on the head I walked out in search of Juls, I knew that if she did hear anything she woudn't be in our room or in the house for that matter. So I walked out into the back garden. She was sitting on a bench facing away from the house. I thought about calling out to her but then I noticed she was on the phone. Her left leg was shaking, never a good sign which meant one of two things, she was excited or really pissed, and if she did hear my conversation with Max, I doubt she's excited. I watched her stand up and throw the phone against the fence, and walk up and punch it, I quickly made my way over to her. I bent down to cradle her but she instantly pushed me away.

"WHY?" That simple word in form of a question stopped me cold.

"I'm sorry I don't know what you're talking about?" Was all I said, but I knew, and she knew that I knew. She stood up holding her left hand in her right and pushed me out of the way. 

"I'm leaving don't bother looking for me because I'll make sure you don't find me unless I'm ready to come back."

"Juls please wait listen to me. I'll tell you whatever you want-"

"How about the truth? The truth about me, Us, about THIS SO CALLED PERFECT LIFE you described to me? How about the truth behind all your lies?!" I stood there quiet I had no answers to her exclamations.

"That's what I thought. Good bye Jay, and don't worry I won't take your kids. Because no matter how much time I spend with them, I can't remember them, I don't know them." She choked on her tears at the end I tried to go up to her, but she held up a hand, putting space between us once again.

"I'm sorry." I whispered, she turned to walk away, I stood where she left me. When she got to the house glass door, she turned and said the word that hurt me the most.

"Jay I though I had started to love you but I can't love someone that can never be honest with me. Now I understand why I walked away from you the day I got hurt. I'm sorry is never merely enough. Good bye Jay. You could've been the best thing in my life but your lies ruined it." With that she walked in. I don't know how long I stood there but when I finally got my body to move I noticed that my vision was blurred from all the tears, my skin was covered in goosebumps, and Alberta was standing in the door way calling out to me. I walked into the living room behind Alberta, and she pointed to a corner. the twins were hugging each other balling their eyes out, and Anthony was in fetal position by the door and Alberta was hugging him. How could she walk away from them, leaving them like this. It infuriated me. Did she have no feelings? I picked up Anthony who had his thumb in his mouth something he hadn't done since he was one, and walked over to pick up the twins and sat them all on the couch, Alberta was the only one that didn't seem to understand or was immune to the situation, it reminded me of Juls impassiveness, I shook my head and after setting them all on the couch. I made them look at me as I told them that I loved them and would never leave them no matter what. My heart broke because I could see the pain Juls had caused on their face, and they seem to not trust me a first but then they all jumped into my stretched out arms. I held on to them as we all cried.