SBI one-shot angst things????

waa waa waa

He was hiding again. It never used to be this bad. His brother had outbursts when he was younger, but he never used to take it out on Tommy. Techno used to soothe Wilbur, he used to stop the outbursts just as soon as they came, but Techno left more often now and Wilbur got upset more often now. Tommy had just turned eight, and Wilbur and Techno were fourteen. Their mom still got upset at Wilbur for his 'tantrums' but her disappointment did nothing to stop him. It used to be crying, screaming, accusing, and stuff like that. Now it was punching and scratching and full-blown attacks. Wilbur was a bully. Tommy didn't know if he meant to be like that or if it was just sibling rivalry. Techno used to tell Tommy it was the way he was wired. That he was different from him and the rest of the family. Tommy still didn't know what he meant, but he had an idea. He thought maybe Wilbur's brain was- it was, wrong? He didn't want to say that about his brother, his big brother whom he used to look up to, but he didn't know how else to word it. Sometimes Wilbur apologized, sometimes he didn't and they just went back to being brothers like normal. He liked it better when he didn't apologize. "Tommy?" Wilbur knocked on his door, Tommy could tell in his voice that he was coming in to apologize, not be a big brother like normal. This fight had been a scratching fight, not a punching fight like usual. Tommy brought this fight on himself this time, though. It wasn't completely Wilbur's fault. Tommy stepped out of his closet and walked to the door, unlocking it and slowly opening it to peek at the side of the door. He knew it made Wilbur feel bad when he looked at Tommy's eyes from the side of his door. "Hey," Tommy said, his face half behind the door. "Can I come in, please?" He asked, his hands were behind his back and his face was still covered in Tommy's scratch marks. He wondered if Wilbur had cleaned Tommy's blood from underneath his nails. "Yeah. You've washed your hands, right?" Tommy asked, he was a germaphobe. He knew he was an insane clean freak, but he liked his room germ-free. Wilbur? Not so much. Wilbur was kind of a big, walking germ. "Yeah, I did." He confirmed, being allowed into Tommy's room, he was quietly chuckling to himself imagining Wilbur as a big germ in a yellow sweater and black jeans with circle-rimmed glasses and messy hair in his big germ eyes. Tommy's room was clean, but it was cluttered. Organized cluttered, not just cluttered. His shelves had books on space and Minecraft, stuff that Techno deemed nerdy. He had no clue Tommy knew the books were all hand-me-downs from Techno himself. The only books he hadn't given Tommy were his Greek Mythology books, but Tommy couldn't care less about that stuff; they were too long with too few pictures. Wilbur sat on the edge of Tommy's bed, it was covered with a red blanket their mother had made for him and way too many pillows and stuffed animals. Tommy sat in his white chair that rolled like the chairs in the office that the office ladies sat in, across the room from where Wilbur was sitting. He crossed his arms and kept his eyes on Will. "I'm sorry. I genuinely am this time." He said, he was used to Tommy's responses, "that's what you said last time," "sure. I really believe you," "okay, Wilbur," That stuff, the sarcastic, still, not over it, eight-year-old's responses drove Wilbur crazy. Couldn't he just accept an apology and leave it in the past? "I uh, I am too, actually," Tommy said, which caught Wilbur by surprise. "Pause, what?" Wilbur said, his eyebrows raised and his eyes wide. "I think I started it this time," Tommy responded, slightly leaning forward and moving his gaze to the floor. Wilbur couldn't even remember what Tommy had said, he just remembered him screaming when Wilbur dug his nails into his arms. "Yeah, well, I made the, uh, I mean- I started the physical- the physical fighting, so thanks for the apology, but it's not necessary." He stumbled over his words, which he didn't do often, only when he was dazed or overly nervous. "I love you, Wil, you- you know that, right?" Tommy asked like he was about to cry. That also caught Wilbur off guard. "Of course, I know that, Tommy-" He was cut off by a very sad and small voice, one that he would never recognize from his abrasive, loud, little brother. "Do you love me, Wil?" Tommy sounded like he was begging. Like he was begging for his older brother, the person who was supposed to make him feel the most loved, to love him at all. "Tommy, T- what?" Wilbur got up from his spot on the bed to go and hug Tommy, but as soon as he stood Tommy jumped. He didn't just jump, he flinched. He was scared of Wilbur. He could do two things; pretend he didn't notice or make it clear that he did very much notice. He chose to pretend. He always did. "Tommy, of course, I love you. You're my little brother, you're like the fucking sun in this god-forsaken gloomy ass family." He tried to make it- he didn't know what he was trying to make that sentence. Funny? "You just don't say it often, Wil." Tommy responded in a small, sad tone. Wilbur didn't say it often, Tommy was right, but Wilbur thought being brothers came with an unspoken kind of love. He didn't have to say it; Tommy knew he did. He was wrong, he guessed. "You don't either, Toms." Wilbur shot back, he wasn't gonna let Tommy blame everything on Wilbur. It wasn't completely his fault, nobody said they loved him enough to make him remember to say it to his little brother. "Well, yeah, but you're supposed to say it. You're the bigger one, aren't I supposed to be the one starting fights, Wil?" He retorted, which pissed Wilbur off. Just because he was older, he couldn't start fights? What bullshit logic was that? "Tommy I go easy on you. I don't fuckin' pick fights, you start them." Wilbur lied. He knew he was lying. They both did. "If you go easy on me then what's your actual fighting like, Wilbur? Batshit crazy?" Tommy spoke louder now. He also cursed, which he's most definitely not allowed to do. Wilbur forgot he was eight most of the time. "Are you asking me to go batshit crazy on you, you fucking prick?" He stepped closer to Tommy's chair, Tommy stood up, and his breathing was faster than usual. He was angry. "Maybe I am! No wonder Techno leaves so often, if I was your twin I would've left ages ago. I would resent you." Tommy stared Wilbur in the eyes like he was waiting for a reaction. Like this was a script that he had planned out. He didn't care about Tommy's staring, his rapid breathing, or the dumb fucking expression he had plastered on his face, all he cared about was the insult he'd thrown his way. Techno isn't leaving so often because of Wilbur, right? Techno loves Wilbur. They- they're twins. He wanted to punch Tommy, to kick him in his fucking rips and break his arms. Instead, he found himself running out of Tommy's room and downstairs to where his mother and father were sitting on the couch. He didn't even realize he'd been crying until, "Wilbur, what's wrong? Why are you crying?" His mother asked, her voice the most comforting sound in the world. He brought his hand up to touch his face, and to his horror, he'd been crying. He didn't care about that too much, he just wanted closure. He needed to know Techno still loved him. "Tommy's being a dick! He- he- I fucking hate him!" He yelled loud enough for Tommy to hear him upstairs. He knew Tommy hated being told on. "Wilbur, please, watch your language. What's going on?" His dad asked before his mom could lecture him on how bad curse words were. "He basically said that Techno hates me and that he left- that-" He tried to say what Tommy had said, he had never tried so hard to say one simple sentence, but he couldn't. His knees buckled and he sat on the floor crying in front of his parents. He was fucking humiliated. He hated this, but he couldn't get up. His mom got up from where she was sitting to sit on the floor next to him, "Wilbur, hey, count with me, okay?" She did this often, she would count and Wilbur would try to slow his breathing to her numbers, but she'd never done this while he was crying, only when he was getting pissed off for whatever reason. "One, two, three, four," He could hear his dad going up the stairs to Tommy's room. "Five. Are you okay to tell me what happened?" She asked. He was calmer now, he wasn't sobbing his eyes out. "He isn't leaving all of the time because of me, right? He didn't start doing all of those tournament things to get away from me?" He sounded pathetic. He sounded like he was nine again. "Wilbur, Techno loves you more than he loves Phil and Greek Mythology combined. Think about that, he's insanely passionate about Greek Mythology. It's probably his favorite thing to read ever, but if he had to choose between reading it and you, he would choose you. If he could only ever see you or your dad ever again, it would be you every time, Wilbur. You are Twins," She moved her hands from his hands, which he hadn't even noticed she was holding, to hold his face on both sides, "He isn't going to his tournaments so he doesn't have to see you. He called yesterday to tell your dad and me that he wanted to come home early to see you." She assured him. She always knew what to say. "Tommy- he... He's genuinely jealous of you two, Wilbur. I know he's never told you, but he's complained about not having a twin bond like you two for years now." She brought one of her hands to him and the other to move her hair from her face. She had a smile on her face that instantly soothed every worry Wilbur had, it was honest. She wasn't lying to make him feel better. "It just got to me, I don't know why. I'm sorry." He kept his focus on the floor, he didn't want to apologize when he was looking at her. "It's fine, Wilbur. I miss talking to you." She said, and that hurt Wilbur more than what Tommy had said. His own mother missed talking to him at all. Why hadn't he talked to her? Why was he pushing her away? "Me too. I'm really gonna try to get better, I swear." He looked her in the eyes this time; he wanted her to know he was being genuine. He also wasn't lying. She smiled, "I believe in you, Wil." That was all he needed. Her trust was all he needed, he was certain he could get better. His thoughts were interrupted by a very upset father and his youngest sons mumbling as they walked down the stairs together. Wilbur turned around to look at them, it was kind of a funny sight. Their dad wasn't short, but he wasn't tall. He was shorter than their mom, but she was six foot two, so it wasn't like he was a midget. Tommy was already 5'4, so he was only four inches shorter than their dad. Tommy had his arms crossed and his eyebrows furrowed, his eyes glued to the floor next to him. Their dad also had his arms crossed but in a more intimidating way. He lightly hit Tommy's arm, "Go on," He said. "Wilbur, I," He stopped to groan in annoyance, "I'm sorry. I wasn't- I didn't mean it." He forced out. His eyes were still on the floor. Wilbur didn't know what to say or do, he was always the one having to apologize, he was never apologized to. "Okay? It- it's fine. It's okay." He settled on, which didn't sound genuine whatsoever but he didn't know what to say so he said anything to break the silent tension in the room. The room settled back into an uncomfortable and awkward silence, but it was broken by Wilbur's phone ringing. He grabbed it from his pocket, desperate to talk to someone to once again break the silence in the room. "Yeah?" He answered it, speaking as quickly as he could to start a conversation, he didn't even know who called him. "Wilbur, I've been calling mom for like an hour, is her phone dead? Can I talk to her, please? I- uh- no just please?" Techno responded, he sounded desperate and spoke fast, stumbling over his words. "Yeah, give me a second, are you okay?" Wilbur knew everything about Techno, he knew that he had OCD and refused to admit it, he knew his brother hated being away from their house. "I'm- please, Wilbur, let me talk to mom." He begged. Wilbur handed his phone to his mom, who was listening, eavesdropping, to their phone call next to him. "Techno, are you alright? What's up?" She spoke, Wilbur tried to hear what he was saying on the other line, but he couldn't make out his hurried, panicked words. "Okay, no- yes. Yes, I'll be there as soon as I can, okay? Alright, stay calm please," She spoke hurriedly and worried, "Okay, I love you, bye." She ended the call. "What? What's happened?" Wilbur asked, he needed to know his twin was okay. "We're going to pick up Techno, you're coming." She put her hand on his shoulder and looked him in the eyes. "Is he alright? He's supposed to be there for another week, is something wrong?" He asked, his voice was small and he sounded like he was eight. "We'll talk about it in the car, Phil can you stay with Tommy please?" She took her hand away and turned to look at his father, who was unsurprisingly visibly worried. "Yeah, text me, okay?" She nodded and headed out the front door.